


Tomorrow, Today

by MrSunshine



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Famous, Barista Lee Minho | Lee Know, Child Abuse, Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, I'm basically tagging everything so there hopefully won't be bad surprises, Internalized Homophobia, Jimin is aged up, M/M, Multi, Overdosing, Tattoo Artist Bang Chan, Tattoo Artist Han Jisung, Tattoo Artist Seo Changbin, Therapy, baker Woojin, mention of suicide, tattoo artist 3RACHA, the rest of the maknae line appears but only occasionally
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-07
Updated: 2020-02-26
Packaged: 2020-02-27 21:46:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 47,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18747718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrSunshine/pseuds/MrSunshine
Summary: He sighed when he looked at himself in the dimly lit bathroom mirror. He looked tired, as always, feeling like he looked a lot older than 22, looking too worried for his age. He couldn’t change it, though. They hadn’t saved up enough money yet to move out, so their days would have to continue being full of worry, anxiety and trying to survive.---Woojin and Seungmin are trying to survive day by day in their abusive home before it gets too bad. Never had they expected to get help from three strangers and to find love on the way to recovery.---An AU nobody asked for but I wanted to write anyway.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE READ
> 
> Contrary to my other Fanfics this is not as fluffy and cute in the beginning and in a few following chapters!
> 
> Please read the tags and every note before the chapter carefully as I'm going to put trigger warnings (tw) before each chapter.
> 
> Please only read it if you feel comfortable with the topics mentioned and if you are in the right headspace to do so.
> 
> If in any case you started reading and a tw pops up that you cannot read but you want to continue reading please feel free to dm me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and I can give you a rundown of the chapter!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 1:  
> \- Child Abuse  
> \- Mentions of Child Abuse

2:30 am.

Woojin sighed and quickly turned off the alarm. He was used to getting up this early by now but he was still afraid to accidentally wake Seungmin.

He felt the younger stirr behind him and quickly pulled the covers higher, placing a gentle kiss on top of his brother’s hair.

“Shh… sleep Minnie… you don’t have to get up for another few hours…”, he whispered and felt him relax again. It was the same every night.

As silently as possible he unlocked their bedroom door and left the room to get ready for work, stepping over empty beer bottles, hoping not to wake anyone. It had happened once and he didn’t want to go through _that_ again, the scar on his back was a far too prominent reminder of the beating he had to endure that night. 

He sighed when he looked at himself in the dimly lit bathroom mirror. He looked tired, as always, feeling like he looked a lot older than 22, looking too worried for his age. He couldn’t change it, though. They hadn’t saved up enough money yet to move out, so their days would have to continue being full of worry, anxiety and trying to survive.

Woojin quickly got ready, putting on some concealer to not look as dead as he felt before he went back into his and Seungmin’s shared bedroom to change into his work clothes. 

“It hasn’t been as bad as it is now in a long time….”, Seungmin mumbled and Woojin turned around, seeing the younger study his back and chest, looking at the already blooming bruises.

“I know… we’ll have enough money soon to move out. Only a few more months…”, Woojin answered while getting dressed.

“I can go look for a job, too, Woojinnie… it will be quicker then…”

Woojin shook his head. 

“No… focus on school okay? Your grades are good enough that we might be able to send you to university one day…”, he said smiling. He wanted Seungmin to have a brighter future than him, hoping that he’d find a better job one day; given that they were able to move out and find a cheap enough apartment that allowed them to save up for tuition money. 

Woojin didn’t mind working as a baker, though. He liked the physical work and seeing his creations at the end of the day or little children’s faces when they saw his bear and bunny buns. He also didn’t mind working double-shifts for more money. It meant he didn’t have to go back home early and that they could hopefully move out faster. 

And he got off at the same time as Seungmin, which meant the younger only had the few minutes in the morning alone with their parents; only a few minutes where Woojin couldn’t protect him. For his taste this was already too much, but they couldn't change it. And luckily most of the time their parents weren’t up then and couldn’t harm him.

“Lock the door again when I’m gone okay? I’ll see you later. Try to get some more sleep.”, he smiled fondly and ruffled through Seungmin’s hair. 

The younger nodded. 

“Mhm… take care, hyung… love you…”

“Love you, too, Minnie…”

Woojin silently left the small flat, after hearing the lock of their room click. He got on his bike and made his way to work, worrying about Seungmin until he got the text that nothing had happened shortly after seven in the morning. 

“Everything alright?”, his boss asked him and he nodded. Jimin knew that their family situation wasn’t the best. She didn’t know about the abuse though. It wouldn’t change anything anyways, she wasn’t able to help them.

Child protective services had been at their home more than once but every time their parents knew how to act and they had been too afraid to let anything slip. The outcome had always been the same. They were another troubled family but not troubled enough to take away the children. The beatings he had to endure after these visits were the worst. Never visible and always hidden behind his clothes so no one would notice. It was always the same. But as long as Seungmin was save he would gladly take everything. 

He watched the parents with their children come into bakery, smiling fondly and handing out the bread, buns and pastries he had just made a few hours earlier. To say he wasn’t jealous was an understatement. Seeing all the love those kids got showered with in front of him hurt, he had never felt what this was like, couldn’t remember the last time he had heard a nice word uttered at him from his parents. 

“Noona? I’m going to take my break, okay?”, he asked Jimin before retreating to the back of the bakery with a sandwich in his hand. Lunch. He didn’t dare to prepare anything at home in the middle of the night in fear of waking his father or mother up.

He checked his phone for texts from Seungmin, but there were none. Which meant everything was alright. Woojin was glad. 

His phone was outdated. But it had been cheap and it was doing the job. Checking on Seungmin and looking for flats. He didn’t really have any friends to keep in touch with anyways. It made him feel lonely often enough, but he kept telling himself that it had to be like that. Luckily his younger brother had made some friends at school and was sometimes able to stay at their homes over the weekend. 

When his break was over he went back into the bakehouse to make another batch of bread and cake and cupcakes for the customers that would come in the afternoon for tea time like Jimin called it. He always looked forward to them, mostly elderly couples enjoying their afternoon and taking a break after a walk, some students after classes and business people on their way. He recognised every single one of their regular customers and knew their orders by heart.

Woojin smiled when he saw one of their youngest regulars come into the shop. It was always the same trio, pierced and in the summers he could see their tattooed skins. As scary as they might look they were one of the friendliest people he had met while working here and always gave them some extra pastries or just something to taste.

“Americano, Cappuccino and Vanilla Latte, I assume?”

The guy in the leather jacket chuckled. 

“Assuming right! But make it to go, we’re running late today.”

“Coming up!”

Woojin turned his back to them, absently listening to their chatter and banter. As much as he liked them it also made him jealous, reminding him of how friendless he was. Hopefully this could change one day.

“Thanks for coming. Have a nice day.”, he said smiling while handing them their coffees and the small box of cupcakes made from leftover batter and frosting Jimin had prepared after they had paid.

“Dude, thanks! You’re the best!”, the guy, who Woojin recognised as the one with the least tattoos and only one lip piercing, said, making the other two laugh, while walking outside.

“Jisung, you’re far too easily impressed!”, Woojin heard the smallest of them say before the door closed.

“Woojin, you can finish the batch and then clean up and go home.”, Jimin said smilingly.

He nodded. “Thank you, noona.”

He quickly finished his work and cleaned everything he needed for his next shift. 

He sighed when he left the the bakery and got on his bike. Another twelve hour shift was over and he had to be back in another twelve.

Putting the bread he had taken with him in his backpack he quickly drove to Seungmin’s school where the younger was already waiting for him. He smiled when he saw him laughing with his friends.

“If I had known you’re not alone I would have sneaked some cupcakes with me.”, he chuckled, which made the the other boys giggle. “Next time you text me, Minnie, okay?”

Seungmin laughed. “I will! See you guys!”, he said to his friends and Woojin watched them walk in the other direction. They were good kids and he really liked them. And they probably liked him too, he was providing them with cupcakes from time to time after all.

“How was school?”, he asked his brother and listened to Seungmin tell him what he, Felix, Hyunjin and Jeongin had been up to while walking home.

He locked his bike when they arrived at the rundown apartment building and went upstairs with Seungmin. Taking a deep breath he opened the front door, bracing himself for what would come.

“Where have you been?! School has been over an hour ago!”, he heard his mother snap at them without a greeting. 

“We got some groceries on our way back, mother.”, Woojin said, handing the bags and the bread he had made over to her.

“At least you’re good for something considering we spent so much money on your education!”

Woojin scoffed. If only this was true. They hadn’t spent a single Won on him. He was still paying everything back to Jimin and her husband.

“What was that?!”, his mother snapped at him.

“Nothing.”, he answered, but he already knew it had been a mistake because not a second later he felt his father push him into the wall next to him. 

His pulse quickened and he felt fear creep up his back. He didn't dare to look into his father's eyes, didn't want to see the hate directed at him. 

“Don’t you dare talk to your mother like that, you ungrateful brat!”, he heard his low threatening rumble before feeling the first punch. He tried to guard himself as well as he could but it was too late. 

He was just glad Seungmin had made it into their room before anything could happen to him and had locked the door, which he only opened again when Woojin asked him to after he had taken a shower and took the first-aid kit from the bathroom with him.

“He never hits you in the face…”, Seungmin whispered with a tearful voice while tending his split lip. Woojin flinched when he felt and tasted the burning alcohol on the cut.

“I know…”

It was getting worse. Day by day he had the feeling that something terrible would happen.

“Soon, Minnie...”, Woojin said and tried to smile but it only hurt and opened the cut on his lip again. 

“I’m going to sleep now, okay…? Try to do your homework, will you? Don’t worry about me. I’m fine…” He kissed Seungmin on the head. 

They both knew it was a lie. He wasn’t fine. His whole body hurt from work and was hurting even more from the beating. Work was going to be exhausting the next day. He didn’t know yet how to explain to Jimin why his face looked like this.

Woojin sighed when he pulled the covers over him and closed his eyes. At least for today it was over, they had survived. Tomorrow was a new day. 

Not knowing yet how soon the “something terrible” would come he fell into a restless and dreamless sleep, feeling Seungmin lie down and cuddle up to him a few hours later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading my new fanfic! I hope you liked the first chapter!
> 
> I'm sorry for the serious topic this time!  
> Tbh I got the idea when I was in a pretty bad headspace myself a while ago and needed to get it out of my system ><  
> So far I've written 10 1/2 chapters but as of now I don't know how regular I'm going to update cause I'm beta reading it myself this time and real life is kinda demanding atm.
> 
> Please let me know what you thought or leave kudos <3
> 
> xoxo ♥


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 2:  
> \- Child Abuse

Woojin left for work with a bad feeling a few hours later. He was always worried about Seungmin but right now it was more than ever. It hadn’t been this bad in a long time.

As always he was alone at work for the first two hours, making a fresh batch of bread and buns in peace until Jimin showed up and started selling with him. It had been like this since she gave birth to her daughter and her husband agreed on staying at home the first year and Woojin kind of liked it. It was the only quiet time he had for himself; sometimes realising how much he needed that time.

Though, as expected he wasn’t able to hide his injuries from her for long. No concealer he owned was able to hide his blueish-purple bruised eye, and the split in his lip occasionally started to bleed again when he spoke or smiled, only adding to his slow and cautious movements.

“Woojin… what happened…?”, she looked at him, worry being written all over her face. She had never seen him beaten up like this, even though she knew that his family life was rough and suspected from what he had told her sometimes that his parents got physical.

“I.. I got into a fight with my father…”, he said not looking into her eyes. He didn’t want to burden her with it but it was obvious she wouldn’t let it go this time.

Handing him a cup of tea she sat him down and got the first-aid kit for his re-opened lip. Woojin flinched, when he felt the disinfect on the cut. 

“I’m so sorry, Woojin. Can I do anything for you..?”

The younger shook his head. 

“Not really… It has always been like that....”, he started before everything burst out of him out of pure despair. “It’s just getting worse lately and I’m afraid they’ll hurt Seungmin, too… I was able to prevent it so far, luckily… they..they don’t even need a reason to beat me up. Just me breathing is enough for them… and I don’t dare to fight back because.. what if they’ll really turn to Seungmin, then…?”

Woojin felt tears dwell in his eyes when she hugged him. 

“I’m sorry-... I just don’t know what to do-...because every time child protection services visited us they… they just knew what to say to make it look like we’re the troublemakers and that they have a hard time with us, blaming us on everything. And they always believed them! We always had to stay-... I just hope that we can move out soon-... we nearly got enough money for a deposit and two months of rent-.. it should be fine soon-..”

“It’s okay, Woojin…”, she whispered, gently caressing his back, “please take your time today, okay? If you need to rest, then rest. I can manage the front alone today, it’s no problem… If I can do anything for you and Seungmin, please let me know, okay…? You can move in with us for a while if you want to...”

“Thank you, noona… That means a lot to me… but Seungmin is still a minor… it’s not that easy...”

He wished it was. But he also knew there was much more to it than just moving out.

Woojin was surprised that staying in the back most of the time worked. He only came to the front when he brought a fresh batch of baked goods, avoiding most of the customers like that.

However, luck left him right after noon, when he brought out the pastries and saw the familiar trio of tattooed guys. He avoided their eyes when putting down the plate, whispering to Jimin that he was going to take a break. Turning back he heard their hushed, worried voices, asking her if he was okay. 

It made Woojin even more uncomfortable. He could deal with the elder customers seeing him like this but not those three guys that were about the same age as him. He didn’t want to know what they must think of him now. He hadn’t heard them offering their help if he needed it.

After work, he quickly texted Seungmin that he’d be a few minutes late. He wanted to withdraw money from his bank account for his younger brother in case he had to leave the flat over the weekend or in the worst case had to rent a hotel for them. Weekends were always the worst. Woojin hated them. 

Seungmin was waiting alone when he finally got to his school and was awaiting him with a big hug.

“Hey there, little one… how was school?”, he asked him while ruffling through his hair.

“It was okay… How do you feel, hyung? Did Jimin-noona say anything?”

“Yes… but it was okay. I stayed in the back most of the day… don’t worry...”

As always they bought some groceries on their way back home, playing for time as much as they could. 

Woojin carried the bags into the small, dirty kitchen, sighing at the sight of it.

“We’re home!”, he shouted towards the living room where he suspected their parents to be. Turning to Seungmin he added:” I’m going to clean up here… please go to our room and do your homework, okay?”

Seungmin nodded and turned around, running into their mother, which made her drop the bottle in her hand. It shattered on the floor.

“Can’t you look where you go, Seungmin?!”, she snarled at him, watching the youngest already picking up the shards. 

Stepping on his hand on purpose, pushing it into the sharp shard, she continued:” And do it right! I don’t want to hurt myself!”

Seungmin let out a pained yelp and Woojin finally snapped, acting on pure instinct. He pushed their mother away from him, which none of them had expected.

“Don’t touch him!”, he growled, positioning himself between her and Seungmin, shielding him even more when their father joined them. He felt fear crawling up his back.

“Go to our room, Minnie… and lock the door…”, he whispered barely audible not leaving their father out of his eyes. His breathing quickened when he saw how angry he was. 

“Go, Minnie!”

Seungmin stood up and quickly ran into their room, catching how their father shoved Woojin back into the kitchen from the corner of his eyes while their mother just stood there and watched.

Locking the door behind him he tried to tune out the sounds of breaking glass and the muffled sobs and screams of his older brother. He crawled into their bed and pulled the covers over him, sobbing and not caring about his bleeding hand.

He wanted it to stop. But he knew he couldn’t do anything. Woojin never let him into the crossfire, always made sure they wouldn’t hurt him.

It felt like forever until he heard the faint knock on the door. He rushed towards it and hastily let Woojin in, barely catching him when the older fell. He looked even worse than he did before, his lip was bleeding again and his breathing was ragged, his rips probably bruised. Unfortunately, their father knew when to stop, so that he didn’t have to go to the hospital and call any attention to them.

“Woojin-...”, he sobbed and instantly started taking care of the visible wounds. Woojin didn’t even flinch this time, he was too tired and slipping in and out of consciousness.

Seungmin lay down next to him after tending his injuries, silently crying into his shoulder.

“Minnie… I got some money for the weekend. When it gets worse while I’m at work go out. Meet with Hyunjin or Felix or Jeongin. And if you think we should stay the night at a hotel, the money should be enough…”, Woojin whispered weakly, gently brushing through Seungmin’s hair.

“Pack what you can carry and just leave in that case…”

Seungmin nodded. He wished he could stop Woojin from going to work like this tomorrow. But he knew they needed the money and that it needed a lot more to make him stop working for a better life. 

“I will…”, he whispered and pulled the covers higher over them.

Woojin only nodded in response, he was too tired and worn out to answer vocally. 

Going to work with an uneasy feeling this day had been horrible, but tomorrow would be hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I never expected to get feedback on the last chapter so quickly and I never expected a lot of people to read it in the first place!  
> I'm really thankful for every single one of you who finds their way here!
> 
> Anyways this was a quick update and short chapter! But I finished chapter 11 already and had time to go over this chapter as well :D
> 
> I hope you liked it! Kudos and comments are highly appreciated ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and recently I made a [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 3:  
> \- (mentioned) child abuse  
> \- mentioned dead sibling

“All alone today?”, Woojin asked politely, when he placed the Vanilla Latte and the cupcake in front of the boy, who he recognised as Jisung. It had taken him a moment though, because his hair was now a vibrant blue instead of a soft brown.

“Mhm… it was too loud at home and I just wanted to get these tattoo ideas done before we open the studio today.”, Jisung mumbled, before he thanked him and looked up. 

His smile vanished instantly when he saw Woojin’s face looking even worse than the day before.

“Dude, hyung… what the fuck happened?? You look a lot worse today! Are you okay?” Woojin could see the sincere concern spreading across Jisung’s face. He smiled a bit.

“It’s okay… Don’t worry… enjoy your time off…”, he bowed slightly and went back into the back of the bakery, shaking slightly.

Jimin had been shocked and livid this morning when she saw him and got to know what had happened. It took everything Woojin had to not have her call the police instantly. It wouldn’t change anything and only endanger Seungmin more.

Had he known that it would turn out the other way round he would’ve let her.

Woojin rushed back to the front when he heard Jisung’s cries for help after the bell rang, freezing when he saw the small bleeding figure in his arms.

“Seungmin!!”

He was next to them in an instant, cradling his younger brother in his arms and inspecting his face. Carefully he dabbed the blood away with his apron.

“We-... we can’t stay there-...”, Seungmin sobbed, clutching onto Woojin’s white shirt. It was only now that Woojin saw the backpack and sports bag next to him.

“What happened, Minnie-...?”, Woojin whispered anxiously, seeing in the corner of his eyes that Jimin closed the bakery. 

“Father-... he was still mad-... because of yesterday-... when I-... when I got up he attacked me-...”

Woojin felt guilt and anger rush through him. It was his fault that Seungmin was hurt. He shouldn’t have gone to work. He should have known that it hadn’t been over yet. He had let his brother down.

“I’m so sorry… I shouldn’t have left you alone. We don’t need to go back. We’ll find a cheap hotel, okay? Do you have the money I gave you yesterday…?”

Seungmin shook his head.

“No-... mother searched our room while father-... she found it-... and took it-...”

Woojin closed his eyes for a moment. Seungmin’s bank account would be empty by now, too. Their parents still had access to it since he was a minor. As soon as he himself had come of age he had revoked their permission to access his own, having at least that money save for now. He didn’t want to think back to the beating he had to endure back then.

He carefully pressed Seungmin closer to his chest, caressing his back, hoping to calm him down and stop him from shaking in terror but looked up when Jimin opened the door again and let two people in. For a second he feared to look into his parents eyes. 

But it was the police.

“I called them, Woojin… it can’t go on like that. I won’t let them hurt you anymore…”, she explained carefully, helping him and Seungmin up to sit at one of the tables. 

“Thank you, noona…”, he whispered, watching the police officers take Jisung’s personal data since he seemed to be some kind of witness. Woojin had completely forgotten about him being there.

A minute later the police officers turned to them and took their data too before they started questioning them, taping everything on band.

They told them everything. About the years of abuse, about the last few weeks where it had gotten gradually worse, the stolen money from their room and Seungmin’s bank account - and most importantly about their dead older brother.

Woojin was crying by now. He’d never wanted to remember what had happened back then, what he had seen.

“Please-... we can’t go back there-...”, he begged, looking at the officers in front of him.

“Woojin-sshi, you’re legal. You don’t have to go back. But… in Seungmin’s case…”, the female officer looked at the younger boy and smiled sadly, “ we do not have many options.”

Woojin instantly panicked. 

“NO! You can’t let him go back! Please! I can take care of him! I’ve done so for the past years!”

Before he could say more she interrupted him again.

“Do you have any family where he could stay instead?”

Woojin shook his head. They didn’t have anyone besides each other. Their grandparents were dead and their other relatives didn’t care about them in the slightest. 

“But I can take guardianship of him! I have a save job and a regular income. That should be possible right?! Please!”

Woojin grew desperate. They couldn’t separate them. He was sure that he’d never see Seungmin again if they put him into a system of foster families.

“Give me a second, okay?”, she said and stood up, going outside to make a phone call from which she returned a few minutes later.

“We have someone at CPS with records of your family, Woojin-sshi. He said it would be possible for you to take legal guardianship of your brother, provided you have a place to live and a steady income. Do you have a place to live?”, she explained.

“Not yet. But I can find one! It just may take some time… but I’ll get a hotel for us in that time…!”

The male officer sighed.

“A hotel won’t be enough, Woojin-sshi…”, looking at his younger colleague he added, “ but it should do for the moment. We’ll stop the questioning here. You have to go to the hospital first and if you want to you can file a lawsuit against your parents afterwards. Provided you’re in the condition to do so today. We’ll wait outside and will call an ambulance for you.”

Woojin watched them leave, pressing Seungmin closer, not realising that Jisung was walking towards them.

“Uhm… hyung…? I know we don’t really know each other… but.. I might have an apartment for you to move in permanently…”, he said, looking slightly uncomfortable for hearing and witnessing everything.

Woojin’s head shot up.

“You what-..?”

“I might have an apartment for you.”, Jisung repeated. “You know Changbin-hyung… the small one. He owns an Airbnb next to our shared apartment. It’s not that big but it should be enough for you and I’m sure we can talk about the price for the rent…”

Woojin stared at him in disbelief. “W-why…?”

“I know it’s none of my business but.. I heard everything… and I can’t do nothing, right? You seem to be such a nice guy to be honest and… I have the means to help you out. Let me come with you to the hospital. I’ll call Chan and Changbin from there and I’ll deal with everything…”

Woojin nodded. He knew trusting him was risky, his trust had been betrayed more once and he didn’t want to remember one time specifically. But, right now, he had no other option.

“Thank you, Jisung… really.. thank you…”, he whispered, before the opening door brought his attention elsewhere.

The paramedics treated some of their injuries on the spot before they brought them to the hospital, allowing Jisung to come with them.

The blue-haired boy waited outside while Woojin and Seungmin got examined and called Chan. It luckily didn’t take him long to pick up his phone.

“Jisung, where the fuck are you?! You know that the store is open today, right?!”, he greeted him, anger in his voice.

“I know! Are you alone? Is Changbin with you? Put me on speaker, please!”, he demanded, not caring about answering Chan’s questions until Changbin repeated them.

Jisung sighed in annoyance.

“Calm down. I’m at the hospital and no I’m not hurt. It’s not because of me. But listen… you know Woojin-hyung, right?”

“Woojin? The hot baker boy?”

“Yes, Chan, the hot baker boy… You know how beat up he looked yesterday? Today was much worse... we need to help him and his younger brother…”

The older boys listened in silence while he explained everything he had heard and seen to them, agreeing on the spot to help them as much as they would be able to. When everything was dealt with Jisung hung up again and went inside the big building in front of him, waiting for the examination to be over.

He smiled when they came out of the room, their wounds treated and bandaged.

“I talked to Chan and Changbin… the Airbnb is occupied the whole week but then you can move in. You’ll stay with us in the meantime if you want to. Our apartment is big enough for that. I didn’t go into detail, but I explained to them what happened today and they are more than willing to help you…”, he said, taking their bags from them.

“Thank you, Jisung… I will never be able to repay you…”, Woojin said, still sightly in disbelief of his kindness and his own trust in him.

“It’s okay… Do you want to go already or should we go to the police station first…?”

“Police station… we want to file the lawsuit first…”, Seungmin answered, looking at his older brother for reassurance. Woojin nodded.

“Okay, let’s go!”

It had felt like hours being at the police station. They issued their lawsuit, where they had to repeat everything again and had to meet with CPS afterwards.

Jisung had to go with them and had to stand bail for them that they would be able to move into the apartment the following week. It was only then that Woojin realised that Jisung was only a few days older than Seungmin, listening to him explain to the CPS worker that his friend Chan was his legal guardian and that he should be able to look up his file in the system.

After another phone call to Chan to confirm that he agreed on everything they made an appointment for Woojin and Seungmin to start the legal process.

When they finally left the building Woojin felt drained. He was tired and his whole body hurt like hell despite the pain killers.

Jisung looked at them. 

“I’ll call us a cab. It’s quicker and you can rest a bit…”, he smiled, shushing them when they tried to protest because of the money it would cost. “It’s okay. I can pay for it…”, Jisung offered and that was the end of the discussion.

Woojin watched the city pass by them through the car window, holding Seungmin’s hand and comforting him. The uncertainty of what would happen and of what lied ahead of them made him anxious. But everything would be better than having to go back to their parents.

“We’re here…”, Jisung finally said and they got out of the car. Woojin looked around. He’d never been in this district before, wouldn’t even dare to come here because he knew the rents were a bit above average.

They followed Jisung into the modern apartment complex, watching him in awe when he opened everything with what looked like a key card.

“I’ve never seen something like that…”, Seungmin whispered after stepping into the elevator, looking at Woojin.

“Me neither, Minnie…”

When they finally reached their floor a door on the other side of the corridor opened and the hall was filled with the smell of freshly made food.

The silver-haired man in the doorway smiled gently at them, stepping aside to let them in before closing the door behind them.

“Hey… I’m Chan and this over there is Changbin.”, he introduced himself and the boy setting the table.

“Jisung already told us a bit about what happened.”, Changbin said carefully, “the airbnb is occupied for the whole week but I cancelled every reservation after that so you can move in. We’ll talk about rent later or somewhen next week, that’s only secondary right now.”, he added smiling. 

Chan nodded. “We have a spare room where you can stay in the meantime and I’ll show you around later.”

“Thank you… we can never repay you for your help…”, Woojin answered, repeating what he had already told Jisung but it was barely louder than a whisper. He felt so small even though he was taller than them, felt like a failure considering what he had achieved in his life and with what he was confronted here.

“It’s okay, Woojin… don’t worry. You don’t have to repay us. It’s more important that you’re both safe now.”, Chan replied earnestly. 

Woojin looked up, but turned his gaze to his younger brother when he felt him squeeze his hand. 

“Hyung… we made it… we’re… we’re safe… we survived…”, Seungmin whispered, looking into his brother’s eyes, his own slowly filling with tears.

Woojin couldn’t do more than nod. He was right. They were finally safe. They got out. They had survived.

It was too much for him. He broke down crying.

And for the first time in years those were not tears of fear, but tears of relief.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And finally we have 3Racha here!  
> But I hope no one expects it to get easier from now on!
> 
> Anyways thank you so much for reading! Let me know what you think in the comments ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 4:  
> \- slight and very short (mentioned) panic attack

By the end of the day Woojin was tired and emotionally drained. It had been a long day and he was way past the time when he usually went to bed. He looked around the room Chan had showed them earlier and sat down on the bed, carefully brushing over the white duvets. He couldn’t remember the last time they had had two blankets.

He smiled a bit, listening to the noise from outside the door, while Seungmin unpacked his backpack. He didn’t know yet how their life would turn out from now on but one thing he knew for sure: it would get better, not easier, but definitely better.

“Have you called Jimin-noona already?”, Seungmin asked while sitting down next to him.

“Not yet. I didn’t have time until now…”, he answered honestly while fishing his phone out of his pocket, dialing her number. It didn’t take long for her to pick up.

“Hey, noona.. It’s me, Woojin.”

“Woojin! Finally! I’ve been so worried about you and Seungmin! How are you feeling? Did you move in with the boy from the bakery?”

“Mhm.. we got our own room here. Their apartment is really big. Far too big for three people, actually…”, he chuckled, “we’ll stay here for the rest of the week and then we can move in next door. We’re okay… It was just too much today…”

“I can understand...what did they say at the hospital?”

Woojin smiled sadly.

“That they haven’t seen something this bad in a long time… We were lucky though. Nothing is broken but my rips are bruised and Seungmin might have a slight concussion. They documented everything and we went to the police station with Jisung afterwards… I’d never thought we would file a lawsuit against our parents one day…”

“I’m so sorry, Woojin… I wish I had seen it earlier…”

“It’s okay, noona… I could’ve never burdened you with this…”

“Woojin, you’re not a burden… you know that… did you get custody of Seungmin?”

“We have an appointment for that on Wednesday. Seungmin won’t go to school the whole week anyways because of his injuries.”

“Good. You’ll stay home too okay? Get some rest…”

Woojin wanted to object but Jimin immediately stopped him.

“It’s okay. My husband will help out here. I’ll still pay you full for the whole week, don’t worry, okay?”

“Thank you…”

“Don’t thank me, Woojin. It’s the least I can do. Get some rest, try to settle down. It will get better now…”

They talked for another few minutes, Jimin asking him to keep her updated in case anything came up and offering her help. Woojin was glad that she was so understanding of everything and that he had her. She was one of the very few people he trusted with his whole heart.

He looked at his brother after he had finally put his phone aside.

“I have the whole week off as well, Minnie.”

 

“Thank God… you’re in no way in a good condition to work. Not with your rips!”, Seungmin answered before snuggling next to him on the bed. 

“Can we go to sleep now, Woojin…? I’m so tired…”

Woojin nodded. “Give me a second, I just need to change first…”

He walked over to their backpacks and retrieved his sleep pants and a shirt. It was sad to see that their whole lives fit into two backpacks and a sports bag. After changing into his pyjamas he lied down next to Seungmin, who had already fallen asleep, following him quickly into the dream land.

Woojin woke up again when he heard the door being opened and instantly pulled Seungmin closer to his chest, protecting him from what was to come. His pulse quickened and he felt fear washing through his body but he tried to stay as still as possible, hoping they’d be left alone.

“Hey… it’s okay… it’s me, Jisung…”, he heard the calm voice of the younger who didn’t seem to move closer anymore. “I noticed your shoes were still at the door and wanted to ask if you have to go to work in case you overslept…”

Woojin relaxed again, a sigh of relief leaving his lips. He carefully sat up, trying not to wake his younger brother.

“Sorry… I forgot that we’re not at home-...”, he interrupted himself. No, it never had been a home, “that we’re not with our parents anymore…”

He rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

“My boss gave me the whole week off to get better, but thank you for thinking about it…”

“Phew, thank God! Because you would’ve been pretty late, then. It’s nearly noon!”

Woojin looked at Jisung, shock written over his face.

“Noon?”, he asked, thinking he might have misunderstood him.

“Yeah… you slept for more than twelve hours. But I think you needed it. Chan-hyung and Changbin-hyung are still asleep, too. And I just woke up. But in all fairness we stayed up pretty long anyways and it’s good that Chan is sleeping. He doesn’t sleep that much. Insomnia, you know.”

He listened to the younger ramble. He had already noticed at dinner that Jisung was really talkative and could start with one topic and end with something completely different. It was refreshing and Woojin thought it was cute.

“Anyways. Do you want breakfast? Otherwise, I’ll let you sleep again. Sorry for waking you, though…”

“No, it’s fine Jisung… I can help you with breakfast, if you let me…”, he answered and got up, pulling the covers tighter over Seungmin, before he followed Jisung into the kitchen.

“Thanks for helping me! Once, I nearly burned down the kitchen because I forgot about the hard boiled eggs. Hyungs were still asleep when the fire alarm went off because the water in the pot was gone and the eggs started burning…”

Woojin chuckled. 

“I take it, I’ll make the eggs then?”

“I got better at it! It was only once.” Jisung was blushing furiously but was laughing, too.

They started preparing breakfast together, Woojin being in charge of the eggs anyways.

“How was your first night here?”

“Good, apparently. Otherwise I wouldn’t have slept this long…”

“That’s good to hear! If you need anything please don’t hesitate and ask, ok?”

“I will, thank you…”

Woojin was silent for a moment.

“Can I ask you something about yourself…?”, he eventually asked hesitantly.

“Sure! Go for it!”

He pondered for a moment on how to best phrase his question, but there seemed to be no sensitive way to ask, so he went for the direct version.

“Why is Chan your legal guardian?”

“Ahhh I kinda should’ve known you’d ask this.”, Jisung said, sitting down at the table and sipping at his hot chocolate. He smiled at Woojin.

“It’s not as bad as your situation, so please don’t worry about that, okay? My family lives in Malaysia. Me and my brother were born in Incheon but we moved a few years ago. But I missed Korea and wanted to come back here. I applied for an art school and got into it but I never quite liked going so I stopped after middle school. I have met Chan and Changbin there and after a bit of back and forth, my parents agreed that I could stay here and we got through the legal process and everything. It was a bit of chaotic ‘cause Chan wasn’t a legal adult either, actually, but he also has the Australian citizenship cause his family lives there and there he’s legal so they made it work somehow? I also think that Changbin’s parents had a bit of influence, too, cause, you know, they’re like richy rich. That’s why we can have our own tattoo and piercing parlor at such a young age, and before you ask, yes, we are that good that we are always fully booked!”

Woojin had to process everything that Jisung just threw at his head. As always, it had been too much of everything at the same time.

“Jisung, you’re rambling again…”, Woojin heard Chan say behind them with an amused smile in his voice before he sat down at the table.

“But like he said. I’m only his guardian because his parents are in Malaysia. And we’ll help you and Seungmin go through that process.”, he said still donning his perfect smile. 

“I take it you don’t have to work today, if you’re here at this time?”

Woojin shook his head and was about to explain that he had the whole week off when he heard Seungmin calling for him in panic.

His pulse started to race and he rushed into the spare bedroom.

“Sh… Minnie, I’m here…”, he said, pulling the younger into his arms, holding him close.

Seungmin was sobbing, only slowly calming down again, from his panic.

“I-... I thought you were gone-...”

“I’ll never leave you, Minnie… never… I’m here.. I’m sorry I got up without waking you…”, he whispered soothingly, kissing his temple. 

Seungmin nodded, visibly embarrassed now for having a panic attack when he noticed Chan, Jisung and Changbin, who had woken up from his screams, in the room, all three of them as startled and worried as Woojin.

“Sorry…”, he apologized, pressing his face into his brother's shoulder.

“It’s okay, Minnie.. are you hungry? Breakfast is ready…”

Seungmin nodded again, taking another moment with Woojin alone before they got up and joined the other three in the living room.

They all spend the rest of the day together, using the time to get to know each other better, now that they were living together.

Jisung repeated his story to Seungmin again, trying to stick to the essentials this time. _Trying_.

Changbin groaned.

“Jisung! You’re rambling again!”, he said, slightly shaking the younger by the shoulders.

Seungmin leaned over to Chan, not leaving the odd pair in front of him out of sight. 

“Does Jisung have something like a “turn-off-button”?”, he asked and Woojin nearly choked on the water he was drinking. He hadn’t expected him to grow comfortable around them in such a short time to ask something like this.

“Not really!”, Chan laughed, shaking his head.

“Oh, he does have one! It’s called Minho!”, Changbin intervened, finally releasing Jisung out of the headlock, whose eyes lit up by the mention of the name.

“Who’s Minho?”

“Minho is the most perfect human being ever. Beautiful, talented, amazing, hot, perfect, brilliant, incredi-”, Jisung only interrupted his speech of praises when Changbin put his hand over his mouth, only to pull back a second later when the blue-haired boy seemed to have licked his palm, which only ended in another quarrel between both of them.

“Minho is his boyfriend.”, Chan informed them in the meantime, trying to ignore the other two, “He’s just extremely busy at the moment, because he opens his own coffee shop soon, so you’ll probably won’t meet him too soon.”

They continued to watch Jisung and Changbin quarrel for another few minutes before they finally calmed down again and the latter started to open up about himself more.

He was living a relatively normal live, but knew he was privileged because of his upbringing. His parents had always been able to grant him and his sister every wish, money never had been an issue. So when he decided to go to art school with the intention of doing something creative later in life he had been fully supported by his family. And when he told them he wanted to open a tattoo parlor with Chan and Jisung they helped them find the perfect location to grow rapidly. 

“They really helped us out a lot, especially financially. We were struggling a lot at the beginning even though Chan already had quite a reputation for his young age.”, Changbin explained, however seeming slightly uncomfortable to talk about money. 

“If it weren’t for Binnie’s parents we hadn’t been able to hire full-time or guest artists at the parlor. Luckily we don’t need their help anymore…”, the older chuckled.

“You’re the same age as Woojin, right? When did you even start all of this? I mean when did you have the time to practice and learn how to do tattoos?”, Seungmin asked the question that was on Woojin’s mind.

“Ah… yeah about that… I may or may not have... uhm... started doing that more or less illegally… while still being in school, working part-time in another parlor, you know…”

“Weren’t your parents mad about that?”

“They didn’t know back then. They’re living in Australia.”

Seungmin shot up, looking at him with big eyes, completely ignoring the implication of Chan’s delinquent youth.

“Australia? My friend Felix is from Australia!”

“Really? Where does he come from?”, Chan instantly shared the younger’s excitement.

“Sydney! But he moved here a few years ago.”

“Oh my God! I’ve been living in Sydney, too! You have to invite him here soon!”

Woojin watched Seungmin and Chan chat about Felix and Australia and couldn’t suppress a smile. He hadn’t seen his younger brother this happy and open in a long time. It was everything to him right now.

His attention was brought somewhere else when he felt Changbin plop down on the sofa next to him. 

“You’re more like the quiet type, right?”, the younger asked but it sounded more like a statement.

“Mostly, yeah…”, Woojin answered truthfully, sipping at his water again, “I had to learn to be quiet, actually…”

Changbin shot him a confused glance before realisation dawned upon him.

“Yeah, right… was probably easier then, wasn’t it?”

“Most of the time it was. Didn’t always help though…” He looked down in front of him, sighing. 

“Sorry…”

“It’s okay. Don’t worry.”

He looked up when Jisung turned on the TV next to them, seemingly trying to change the uncomfortable topic and to lift the mood. It didn’t work when the first thing they saw on the news where their parents’ mugshots.

He and Seungmin gasped audibly, following the story about their parents being arrested for child abuse in three cases; one resulting in death by suicide. The story continued with their CPS records, the news reporter asking the viewers if this had been preventable if CPS would’ve done their job right.

Woojin was shaking, slowly realising that this was on the nation wide news, that they’d be another case of that had been failed by CPS. And even though their own names weren’t mentioned he knew that not only his old friends from school would now know about this, but also Seungmin’s friends. And that was something he had always tried to prevent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg thank you so much for 100 kudos and over 600 hits already!! I'm crying srsly! I never expected this for this fanfic cause of the serious topic and asfghjkl I love you all so much!!! Thank you!! ㅠㅠ
> 
> Finally a slightly calmer chapter phew. Can't have the drama in every single one right? But we got a bit of backstory for 3Racha uwu
> 
> The next chapter is really short so I hope I can also upload it by the end of the week, depending on my schedule uwu
> 
> Hope you liked this chapter! I will now go back on writing the 12th~~
> 
> Also if you ever think I'm missing a TW at the beginning of a chapter or think I should include or add another one please let me know! ♥ I try to be as thorough as I can but some thing might slip past me
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 5:  
> \- mentioned suicide

It didn’t take long for Seungmin’s phone to go off after the news were over. Hyunjin, Felix as well as Jeongin tried to contact him, they had had visited them once or twice after all and knew what their parents looked like. Woojin saw that it was too much for his younger brother right now. 

Carefully he took his phone from his hands and pulled him closer, gently rubbing his back.

“It’s okay, Minnie… they care about you... don’t be afraid...”, he whispered soothingly.

Seungmin only nodded, not daring to speak in fear his voice would crack. 

Still holding him close, he watched the other three leave, giving them the space they needed right now. Woojin had to thank them later. 

Still, he didn’t want to banish them from their own living room. He picked up his brother carefully and carried him into their shared bedroom, staying there until he eventually fell asleep after he had talked to his friends and had calmed down.

“Good night, Minnie…”, Woojin whispered and pressed a gentle kiss to his hair before silently leaving the room.

The apartment was dark by now, it seemed like everyone had retreated into their rooms.

As silently as possible he made himself a cup of tea before sitting down on the balcony, watching the city that slowly went to sleep but never really calmed down, getting lost on his thoughts.

He only looked up again when he noticed someone sitting down next to him.

Chan.

“You alright, Woojin?”, he asked calmly, smiling at him.

“I’m okay. Don’t worry. But thank you for giving us room earlier.”

“No problem, really… how is Seungmin holding up?”

“He’s asleep now… He had a group call with his friends, which was pretty exhausting for him… if it’s okay for you they’d like to stop by after school tomorrow…”

“Of course. They are more than welcome here.”

Chan stayed silent for a while, watching the city with Woojin, before he spoke again, carefully addressing what he suspected.

“What about your friends…?”

Looking up at the night sky Woojin took his time to answer, smiling sadly.

“I haven’t had a friend in years, Chan…”, he eventually whispered still watching the sky, not looking at Chan who was studying him with a sad smile.

The younger followed his gaze into the night sky. ” Yeah.. I actually figured when your phone stayed silent while Seungmin’s continued to ring…. I’m sorry… It must have been hard…”

“In the beginning it was… but I got used to it pretty fast…”

“May I ask what happened…?”

Woojin nodded, but, again, took his time to answer, sorting his thoughts first. He had never opened up about this to anyone, had never talked about it, only ever to Seungmin but even then tried to avoid the topic as much as he could. He didn’t want him to feel guilty about it. And he didn’t want to remember.

“You remember that they talked about three children on the news, right?”, he looked at Chan, before turning back watching the sky when the younger nodded.

“Shortly before I graduated middle school our brother committed suicide. Seokjin was five years older than me and he always protected us from our parents. In the end he couldn’t take it anymore. We suddenly were on our own and I knew that it was my duty to protect Seungmin now. I graduated with surprisingly good grades. But instead of continuing with high school like my friends did, I looked for a job, hoping that Seungmin and I could move out as quickly as possible.”

Woojin paused, sipping at his tea.

“I found the job at the bakery where I still work. Jimin’s husband trained me in becoming a baker and I started to save as much money as I could. I actually thought we could make it. But since I was still a minor our parents had access to my bank account and they took most of the money I earned. I was only able to start saving up when I became legal and revoked their access. The only things on my mind were work, earning as much money as possible and Seungmin’s well-being. So after a while, I think it was still the first year of high school, my friends contacted me less and less because I always stood them up until they eventually stopped contacting me at all.”

He stopped again, feeling the tears dwell in his eyes when the memories slowly crept back into his mind. He looked down at his cup. It was only half of the truth he was telling Chan but it was enough for him understand the situation. He kind of trusted him but not enough to tell him everything about his past.

“It hurt a lot but it was also my fault, you know. But, for me, Seungmin and that we survived and could move out was more important. I started working double-shifts as soon as I was allowed to and was so occupied that I forgot. I didn’t have the time to think about it, it only came back when you three started to become regulars at the bakery and when I saw how you interacted with each other…”

“I’m sorry…”, Chan whispered, not exactly knowing what to say. He hadn’t expected him to tell him so much about himself.

“Don’t be… I gladly took everything upon myself for this. For surviving and seeing our parents finally getting what they deserve. For seeing Seungmin grow up and having a better future and education. I really like being a baker, don’t get me wrong, but in middle school I never thought that would be my career… but… it was worth it… everything…”

Woojin looked up in surprise when Chan took his mug from his hands and pulled him into his arms, comforting him, when he finally let his tears run freely.

“You did great, Woojin… Seungmin is an amazing boy. And despite everything both of you have been through, you are still so gentle and kind. You can be really proud of yourself. You survived and you’re not alone anymore. We’ll help you as much as we can, I promise.”, he whispered, gently rubbing circles on his back.

The older was sobbing by now, clinging to Chan for dear life. Everything was coming back to him, the memories of their brother, what his old friends did to him, how lonely he had felt when giving up everything for Seungmin.

“Thank you-...”

“No need to thank me, that’s what friends are for…”

Chan was smiling at him and Woojin couldn’t suppress as slight smile either, while brushing away his tears. They stayed like that for a while, Chan holding and comforting him and Woojin being the one being comforted for a change, feeling safe for the first time in his life.

It was way past midnight when it got too cold even with a blanket around them and Woojin felt how tired he was. The younger closed the door behind them and brought their mugs into the kitchen before walking Woojin to the bedroom. 

“If you ever need to talk, or need comfort, or just someone to listen, please don’t hesitate and come to me, okay?”, Chan said before hugging him goodnight.

“Thank you, Chan… Good night…”, he whispered, watching Chan walk towards his own room, before he joined Seungmin. 

His brother instantly cuddled up to him and Woojin smiled. He felt lighter than he used to, a lot of pressure and worries having left him so that nothing would be in their way for a new start. Or so he hoped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little and short update to get some more backstory. Though, Woojin's still hiding something.
> 
> And we now know who the third brother was (which obviously has been in the tags since the beginning). Please don't hate on my for that. I only listen occasionally to BTS but Jin's definitely my favourite of all of them so it hurt picking him. And my girlfriend is still hating me for it, but well... I thought it fit? And still I'm really sorry!
> 
> In the next chapter we're gonna meet Felix, Hyunjin and Jeongin again! :)
> 
> I hope you liked the chapter even though it was short! Thanks so much for reading ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 6:  
> (I think there are none. Though let me know if I have missed something)

Woojin was taking out the banana bread from the oven when the doorbell rang and Seungmin tried to open the door. Jisung had left his key card for them when they went to work and Woojin promptly used it to buy some ingredients for banana bread when he saw the ripe bananas in the kitchen - much to Seungmin’s dismay because he wanted his older brother to finally get some rest. But baking had always calmed Woojin down and probably always would.

He smiled nervously as he heard the familiar chatter of the three boys from outside the door. He didn’t know what to expect, what they would say and how they would react as soon as they saw them with their still not fully healed injuries?

“Seungmin!”, Hyunjin cried out when they were let into the spacious apartment, hugging the younger boy tightly before the other two puppy piled him, too. No one said a word, only the stifled sobs from the four high schoolers were audible. It broke Woojin’s heart to see them like this, seeing worry and guilt on their faces because they hadn’t known, hadn’t helped them earlier. As if they could have prevented it.

“Come on in boys.”, Woojin interrupted the scene in front of him after a while, “are you hungry? I made some banana bread if you want to…”

Jeongin gasped audibly when he looked up, quickly followed by Felix and Hyunjin, when they too saw the still darkly blooming bruise on his face.

“Hyung… oh my god…”

A second later he found himself surrounded by three crying boys, hugging him tightly. He smiled a bit and looked at Seungmin, who smiled back sadly.

“It’s okay boys… it’s over now… don’t worry anymore, okay…?”, he whispered, gently patting Felix on the head.

“But-... if we had known-... we-...”, the Australian boy started but Woojin quickly interrupted him.

“I know, Felix… but it wouldn’t have changed anything…”

“Mum said you could’ve stayed with us-...”, Felix said, pulling back and brushing away his tears. He sat down his backpack before opening it and grabbing something. 

“Here… Mum said I should give this to you…”, he explained while handing him a white envelope. Woojin took it and looked inside, his eyes growing wide seeing the bills.

“Felix-.. we can’t accept this. That’s too much!”, he tried giving the envelope back to him but Felix refused and shook his head. 

“She said she wants you to have it. For a fresh start and some help to get back on your feet. It’s the least we can do now, to help you as much as possible.”

He wanted to object again when Hyunjin and Jeongin also pulled out gifts for them. Woojin felt like crying. He had never expected this, would have never thought that their families cared so much about them. He had to visit all of them as soon as he could to thank them.

“Thank you-.. this means a lot to us…”

“Dad said we might have a few things from renovating left. He will check the garage on the weekend and if you need anything you can have it.”, Jeongin said.

“Same here! Mom said you can come into her store whenever you want in case you need new clothes! And if you need anything else you just have to give us a call and we’ll help you out. She’s really relieved that you have a place to live already.”, Hyunjin added smiling again.

Woojin nodded and looked at Seungmin again who was still a bit dumbfounded. He had found the right friends. He was glad they cared so much and wouldn’t leave him now.

“But now come on in, okay? The banana bread is still warm and the chocolate chips inside are still soft and melted.”, Woojin eventually said, changing the topic. As much as he was glad about their help, talking about it and their situation still made him slightly uncomfortable.

While he cut the bread into pieces and made some tea, Seungmin showed them around, showing them their shared bedroom and as much from the apartment he could without invading their hosts’ privacy.

“We will move in next door at the end of the week. Changbin-hyung showed us the apartment earlier. It’s not as big as this one and still has only one bedroom but it will be enough for us, right Woojin?”, Seungmin explained when they entered the living room again and Woojin nodded.

“Yes. It’s also completely furnished so we don’t need to buy new things.”

“But isn’t it expensive? I mean… the area here looks kinda upper class and with all the technology here…”, Felix asked, before stuffing his face with banana bread.

“It might be. But since the apartment belongs to Changbin he can decide the rent on his own and he goes pretty easy on us for now.”

Felix nodded. “That’s good… I hope things will get better for you now.”

“It will, Lix… everything is better than living with our parents…”, Seungmin said, leaning onto him. 

Woojin watched the four boys for a while before putting the rest of the banana bread away for Chan, Jisung and Changbin, leaving the boys to themselves. He wanted to start preparing dinner anyways, so that it was ready when the three artists came home, inviting Seungmin’s friends to stay, too.

Shortly after he was done and the boys had set the table, the door opened. Seungmin jumped to his feet instantly, welcoming them home and introducing his friends. Woojin watched the intimidated looks on the high schoolers’ faces with amusement.

“Hey! Nice to meet you, I’m Chan! So… who’s the Aussie??”, Chan introduced himself and expectantly looked into the three faces in front of him, beaming when Felix raised his hand.

“ _Oh my God! Seungmin said you’re from Sydney right! I grew up in Sydney too!_ ”, he said instantly switching to English and Felix face lit up. They engaged into a conversation straightaway and Woojin saw the ice breaking for the other two boys, too. He hadn’t had such a lively dinner in ages, but he most certainly enjoyed it, just listening to their banter and chatter.

An hour later Hyunjin’s mother arrived to pick the boys up. Woojin went downstairs with them to thank her, taking a bit of the banana bread with him that he was able to rescue. She smiled sadly when she saw him.

“Woojin… I’m so sorry…”, she said while hugging him. He smiled sadly.

“Thank you…”, he whispered, “and thank you for everything else. We are really thankful for your help Hwang-sshi…”

“You’re welcome.. I’m just glad you two have a place to stay and are safe now… stop by the store as soon as possible, okay?”

“We will… thank you….”

He handed her the small package in his hands.

“I’ve made some banana bread earlier. That’s all that is left unfortunately but I’ll bring some cupcakes when we come to the store.”

“Thank you. But you don’t have to Woojin…”, she smiled gently at him. He knew that he didn’t have to, but he wanted to. It was the least he could do to repay them for their help.

He watched the car drive away before he turned around to go back inside, a voice stopping him in his tracks.

“Woojin?”

Woojin slowly turned around again, looking directly into a once familiar face.

“Dohyun…?”

“Oh my god… It’s really you…”

Woojin didn’t know what to say, he’d never thought he would see one of his old friends again, least of all Dohyun. Their friendship had ended on the worst terms possible and to this day it still haunted Woojin in his dreams. 

“What are you doing here? Weren’t it your parents on TV yesterday?”, Dohyun snapped him back out of his trance.

“Staying at a friend’s apartment...”, the baker eventually answered, growing more and more uncomfortable in the other’s presence.

Dohyun scoffed.

“A friend? You still have friends?”

“New friends…”

“New friends? How in heaven's name can someone like you make friends?”, Dohyun took a step towards Woojin, who instantly stepped back, fear crawling up his back.

The moment Woojin wanted to reply, the door behind him opened and Chan stepped out, eyeing the situation in front of him suspiciously.

“Woojin…? Is everything okay?”, he asked, his gaze fixed on the unknown man in front of Woojin. He had the feeling that he had arrived at the right time, judging from the aggressive body language the stranger was showing.

“Who’s that?”, Chan jerked his head towards Dohyun, while putting his arm around Woojin, feeling the older relax a bit. 

Still watching Dohyun carefully, Woojin shook his head.

“No one…”

“Okay… let’s go back upstairs then… Seungmin’s waiting…”, he said, gently pulling Woojin with him towards the still open door, shooting a last warning glance at the other man.

Woojin tried to hide his still slightly shaking hands when he entered the apartment, smiling carefully when his younger brother took them into his own.

“Are you alright? You’ve been gone for a while…”, he said and Woojin could see the worry in his eyes. He took a shaky breath before answering.

“It, okay… It’s… I ran into Dohyun…”

“Dohyun?! That fucker! Wh-...”

Before Seungmin could say more he interrupted him, shaking his head.

“Seungmin. Nothing happened.”

“Still! I hope he’s not living around here! He’s the last person you need to see!”

Woojin sighed. He knew Chan was already worried and alerted, knowing that the other three were listening even if they tried to hide it. 

“It’s okay, Minnie… I’m fine…”, he sighed again, “I’m heading to bed now… I’m tired…”

After one last hug from Seungmin and wishing everyone a good night he retreated into their bedroom, hoping that he could quickly forget this encounter and hoping that it had been the only time he saw him. He didn’t know yet how wrong he was.

Seungmin on the other hand was still fuming and knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep now. Staring straight ahead he sat down back on the sofa, taking the cup of hot chocolate into his hands again.

Changbin watched him carefully, being as surprised as the other two to see the youngest like this.

“So.. since no one is going to address the elephant in the room, I’m doing it. Who’s that Dohyun guy?”

“Park Dohyun. He’s the biggest piece of shit on this earth!”, Seungmin replied grumpily, still not looking at anyone.

“So he’s definitely not no one like Woojin said… Otherwise you wouldn’t react like that, Minnie…”

Seungmin exhaled loudly, letting his shoulders drop.

“No… he’s not just ‘no one’. He broke Woojin’s heart into a million pieces, hurt him and simply abandoned him in the cruelest way possible.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we're half-way through of what I've written already. Though the fanfic is not done yet!
> 
> And I was really hesitant to upload this chapter cause it's probably the one I like the least ㅠㅠ I hope you liked it anyways!  
> I seriously hope there's no idol or celebrity called Park Dohyun. I did a quick search on google but couldn't find any. Though if there is this person is not meant! This is just a random dude (well not that random which you've probably guessed. We haven't seen the last of him yet)
> 
> Anyways I hope you kind of liked the chapter! Thank you so much for reading ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!
> 
> P.S. Is anyone planning on going to the GOT7 concert in Berlin?? I might have to go alone ㅠㅠ


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 7:  
> /

When Seungmin went to bed an hour later Woojin seemed to be asleep. He hadn’t expected it if he was being honest, had thought he would still catch him wide awake. But he was glad, Woojin needed as much sleep as he could get and they could talk about everything another day.

Chan and the others had asked to know more about what had happened with Dohyun but he hadn’t want to answer it. This would be Woojin’s job in case he ever wanted to tell them and not his. Luckily, they had understood, understood why he didn’t want to talk about Woojin’s past and privacy without his consent.

Seungmin quickly changed into his sleeping clothes and laid down next to his brother, cuddling closer to him as he always did.

“Night, Minnie…”, he heard his low, drowsy voice and smiled. He should’ve known. Woojin rarely slept before him.

“Night, hyung…”, he replied silently before closing his eyes and slowly fell asleep.

The rest of the week went by quickly. Woojin continued to bake for all of them at least every second day so the apartment always smelled like a small bakery and Seungmin understood. The bakery was his safe place, always had been since he started working there. This was his new safe place, their safe place. And without realising it the smell started to calm him, too.

Especially on the days when they had to meet with CPS or the police for another statement. Chan accompanied them to both appointments in case they needed someone to bail for them again and for moral support.

Seungmin and Woojin were nervous wrecks before the CPS appointment, both being afraid that Woojin couldn’t be his brother’s legal guardian all of a sudden, that he didn’t fulfill the requirements anymore and that Seungmin would be put into the system and would be taken away.

“Hey… both of you.. calm down… everything will be fine. We have all the documents you’ll need to fill out the form and if something is missing the case worker will help you get it. They’re on our side, don’t forget that.”, Chan reassured them again for the millionth time that day, always smiling sympathetically. He understood their worries after all.

Woojin exhaled slowly and nodded. But before he could answer the door opened and they were called into the small office. He sat down in front of the desk, trying to hide his insecurities, while Seungmin sat down to his left and Chan to his right. He didn’t know the woman in front of them, the last time he saw their CPS worker it had been a man, which is why she introduced herself first.

“My name is Yang Eunji. I got assigned to your case this week after a screening where your old case officer was deemed incapable of continuing. I hope this is okay for you. We didn’t have time to inform you yet..”, she explained smilingly. 

Woojin nodded. “That’s fine for us…”, he answered, seeing this as a chance that it would get better, their old worker had been pretty incompetent at his job, otherwise their brother would still be alive and they wouldn’t have stayed at their parents for so long.

“That’s great to hear, Woojin-sshi.”, she smiled at him and Seungmin, before turning to Chan. “I have to note down everyone involved in this appointment today. Would you be so kind to tell me your name, too?”

“Oh, yeah. Bang Christopher. I’m here because they currently live with us until they move into our apartment next doors. And I kind of know how this process works because I went through it a while ago, too.”

“So, you’re their landlord?”

“Not exactly. Theapartment belongs to our friend who can’t be here because of work responsibilities. But I have all the documents with me as well as a consent form and a certificate of authority to act in his name.”, Chan says and hands her the documents mentioned.

Yang-sshi nodded, looking at them closely. 

“You said you went through this, too?”, she asked, already typing on her keyboard before her. “Bang Christopher. Legal guardian of Han Jisung, is that right?”

“That’s correct, yes.”

Turning to the side he finally saw the confused looks on Woojin’s and Seungmin’s faces.

“What?”

“Christopher?”

“Oh, did I forget to tell you? That’s my legal name. Chan is just my artist’s name but the only people calling me Christopher or Chris are my parents and siblings.”, he clarified for them while Yang-sshi read through his file. 

She looked up again and smiled when she was done. “It’s always good to have someone by your side to help you. Since you have some experience in this, Bang-sshi, I think you have told them everything we’d need today?”

“As far as I could, yeah. I’m not sure if they have everything since the reasons are different, but I hope so.”

He really did. He didn’t want to go back into the apartment of their parents with them to obtain documents. He hadn’t cared that it was dirty and untidy, he could also ignore the empty beer and soju bottles, but he wouldn’t manage to watch again how tense and uneasy Woojin and Seungmin were, how, even though they knew their parents were under arrest, they were cautious when turning around a corner and going through the documents, that were surprisingly put away in a folder. 

Chan had looked around the run-down apartment before he followed Seungmin into their old shared bedroom to pack a few things the younger had hurriedly left behind a few days ago. Chan had been in shock when he had seen the small room, far too small for two people to live in, let alone three. The room was barely big enough for a bed that they obviously had shared, a small closet and a desk where a few of Seungmin’s school books were lying. He couldn’t believe that they had lived like this for years.

He had helped Seungmin pack as much as he could, even stuffing a few of Woojin’s shirts into his own backpack, before they had joined the oldest in the living room again, leaving together as soon as they had all the documents they needed. 

When they left the flat Chan noticed a few neighbours watching, however not approaching them. Better be it. He would’ve probably snapped at them, asking how they could have turned a blind eye on all the obvious abuse that had happened behind these doors.

The thought of it alone sent shivers down Chan’s spine. Shaking the thoughts from his mind he watched Woojin fill out the form in front of him, asking for his help when he filled out the address field, not having it remembered by heart yet.

Yang-sshi scanned the paper when they were done, checking it for mistakes and unclarities, going over it again with Woojin and Seungmin.

“Okay. That’s all for today, then. You will receive a letter in the next two weeks with an invitation for another interview with me, my boss and a committee that will decide in the end. I’m sure Bang-sshi can help you prepare for this, the questions are mostly the same just more fitted to your case, but I haven’t told you that.”, she said, winking at them.

Woojin watched her placing the documents inside an envelope and nodded. “Okay… thank you so much for your help, Yang-sshi.”, he said and bowed slightly.

“That’s what I’m here for. I’m just sorry that it took so long… In between us, I hope it shook up the whole authority enough that cases like yours can be avoided as much as possible in the future. It’s just sad to see that something like this has to happen before actions happen….”, she smiled at them sadly as she stood up. “I’ll see you at our next appointment, then. Get home safely.”

They bid their goodbyes and left the building. Outside, Woojin had the feeling he was finally able to breath again. The first step was done and he was positive that this time luck was on their side, that it would work without further disturbances. 

“See? I told you they were on your side…”, Chan said smilingly, patting both brothers on the shoulders. “How about I treat you to lunch, now?”

Chan showed them to a small restaurants a few streets away from their tattoo parlor, which made Woojin realise that he couldn’t remember the last time Seungmin and he had eaten at an actual restaurant. It had been years.

“Thank you for your help, Chan… Having you, Changbin and Jisung help us makes everything so much easier and faster…”, Woojin said when they got their food, Seungmin nodding in agreement and smiling a bit.

“You don’t have to thank me. We’re glad that you let us help you and we are willing to do it as long as you do. And now enjoy your meal! We can stop by the parlor afterwards if you want to.”

Seungmin’s eyes lit up. “Really? Can we do that? Will Changbin and Jisung be there?”

“I hope so!”, Chan laughed, “It’s a regular work day today and I just took it off, so they should be there.”

Seungmin turned to his brother. “Can we go there?”

Woojin chuckled. “Of course. We don’t have anything else to do today anyways.”

The youngest was excited about it for the rest of their lunch break, even more when they made their way to said parlour. Woojin had seen it on photos already since Jisung hadn’t been able to resist to show him but it was even more stunning in real life.

The parlour was situated on the ground floor in the middle of a busy shopping street with cafés and clothing stores around them. It was bright, spacious and open with clean and slightly expensive looking decor, paintings the artists had made, and photos of famous customers on the walls. On the far end of the parlour Woojin could see a wall that was spray painted with the 3RACHA logo in bright colours that contrasted the else black and white interior. The photos Jisung had shown him definitely didn’t do it justice.

Looking around he spotted the blue-haired boy talking to someone behind the counter. Not a customer then. Jisung’s head shot up when he finally spotted them, showing his bright smile.

“There you are! How has it been??”, he asked them stepping around the counter to hug them.

“It went fine. We’ll get the interview letter within the next two weeks.”, Woojin explained to him before his attention was brought to the brown-haired boy Jisung had been talking to minutes before.

“Ah, you must be Woojin-hyung and Seungmin, then.”, he stated showing a cat-like smile and bowed slightly, “Jisungie has been talking about you a lot. I’m Minho, his boyfriend.”

“Likewise, Jisung has already told us a lot about you.”, Woojin chuckled before introducing himself and Seungmin, spotting a tongue piercing when Minho laughed about his comment.

“Yeah he talks a lot! Right, babe?”, he grinned at Jisung who pouted at him with crimson cheeks. 

“And still you fell for me!”, the younger replied sticking out his tongue, earning the same gesture back from Minho.

Seungmin’s eyes went wide when he saw the piercing. “Didn’t that hurt?”, he asked as he had already done with every piercing he had spotted on the other three.

“Hm? What?”

“The piercing! In your tongue!”

“Oh that. It was uncomfortable, but it was worth it seeing how much Jisung loves it and how much it drives him crazy.”

The youngest looked at him confused, not understanding the correlation, his question seemingly showing on his face. 

Before Chan could intervene, Minho was already grinning and answering the unspoken question. “It’s great for blow-jobs.”

“Minho! Do you have to show _that_ side of yours this early?!”, Chan scolded him, watching Seungmin, Woojin and Jisung turn as red as tomatoes. 

Minho on the other hand was laughing loudly again. “It’s only the truth, isn’t it? You know that, Channie~”

Chan shook his head. “I’ll murder him one day. And it will look like an accident…”, he mumbled, gently pushing Woojin and Seungmin away from them and towards a row of half walls. “He’s not always like that. He’s actually a really sweet guy but sometimes…. But let me show you around, okay? I think Changbin even has an appointment right now and maybe he and the customer let us watch for a moment”

He turned the corner of one of the walls asking them to wait for a second.

“Hey Binnie.”, he said smiling, watching the younger man work highly focused. 

“Hey.”, Changbin finally looked up after finishing the outline he was working on, “Are you alone? How did it go?”

“It went well, as expected actually. Letter comes in about two weeks time. And Woojin and Seungmin are waiting here actually. Do you mind having them watch you for a while?”

“No, send them in.”, he turned to the young woman on the seat in front of him. “Would that be okay for you? Having two friends watch me work?”

She nodded. “It’s okay. I don’t mind.”

Chan left them for a second and returned with both brothers. Changbin greeted them smilingly before turning back to his work.

“That’s what all our tattoo stations look like by the way. The walls are for privacy reasons, obviously, but we didn’t want to close the rooms down completely so we have installed the half walls with glass on top.”, Chan said before explaining what Changbin was doing and showing them a bit of the utensils that were needed.

Seungmin listened to him in fascination, absorbing every word like a sponge. Woojin on the other hand was more mesmerized by Chan’s excitement, watching his face and light up while showing them around proudly. It was obvious that this was his dream and passion and it made Woojin happy that he had been able to realize it already at such a young age. 

They watched Changbin work for a while, Seungmin asking questions from time to time. In the end they stayed with them until they closed the parlor for the day. Woojin was glad about it, it took his mind elsewhere and he stopped thinking about CPS for at least the rest of the day.

He smiled when they eventually went to bed, having spent the rest of the evening in the living room chatting with Chan, Changbin, Jisung and Minho, who was staying the night.

Seungmin cuddled up to him and he put his arm around him.

“Did you enjoy the afternoon?”, he asked him, gently brushing through his hair. 

“Mhm… it was so much fun to see them work. But watching Jisung do that piercing was a bit much…”, Seungmin chuckled, pulling the covers more over them. “And I’m glad that the appointment is over, too... “

“Me too, Minnie… It’s going up… it’s finally going up.”

It really did. They had found new friends, that were helping them unconditionally, the custody case was in process and it was safe to say that their parents would go to jail. And soon they’d be moving into their own apartment together.

This night, Woojin fell asleep with a smile on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Minho's finally made an appearance! Yay~  
> I'm sorry I couldn't resist the piercing remark from Minho cause that's what I've been told too a few years back lol
> 
> Anyways, I probably have to start uploading this thing a bit slower or else you gotta wait even longer for newer chapters. I can't write as much as I want right now because of personal issues (and because I started playing Legend of Zelda - A Link between Worlds again but that's another topic) but I'm trying my best uwu 
> 
> I hope you liked the chapter! :) Let me know what you thought in the comments ♥
> 
>  
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!
> 
> Thanks so much for reading ♥


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 8:  
> \- mentions of abuse  
> \- mentions of suicide  
> \- threatening  
> \- CPS  
> (I don't even know what to tag here rn I'm so sorry I hope I didn't miss anything ><)

“That was the last one!”, Seungmin announced and closed the closet door, smiling happily at his big brother. 

Woojin looked around the small apartment and smiled. They had finally moved in, finally had their own space to live in. It was still sparsely decorated and had no personal touch yet, but still, it already felt more like home than when they were still living with their parents.

“We can make it, can we?”, Seungmin asked and Woojin put an arm around him, gently hugging him. 

“Yes... we can make it, Minnie…”, he answered truthfully, finally being able to believe these words himself. He knew they still had a long way to go. The second CPS interview would be soon, as well as the trial with their parents, and not to mention the therapy, about which he still hasn’t talked to Seungmin. It was a sensitive topic for them.

He sat them down on the small sofa after making them a cup of tea.

“Listen, Minnie… the next few weeks will be stressful and hard… and then there will be nothing and we can probably focus on us and… everything we went through… I don’t want us to fall into this hole, you know… that’s why I think we should get therapy…”, he explained, not knowing how Seungmin would react and not knowing yet that he'd be the one who got hit harder.

The younger nodded and leaned more onto his brother.

“Mhm… we probably should...“

Seungmin had thought about it too already, had even talked to Changbin about it a few days before. He didn’t want to go, not after therapy had more or less led to their brother’s suicide, but he knew they needed it, Woojin more than himself, having endured so much more abuse and trauma than himself. Had seen so much more.

“Thank you, Woojin…”, he whispered silently, cuddling closer.

“For what?”

“Everything… we were only able to survive thanks to you... you took so much upon yourself and always worked so hard to get us out there… always stood between me and our parents to keep me save... even kept me out of everything when you found Seokjin in the bathtub so that I didn’t have to see-...”; Seungmin sobbed quietly when the memories came back, letting himself pull closer to his brother to sit on his lap. 

“You’re the strongest person I know, Woojin-... and I-... I owe you so much-... for-... for sacrificing so much for me-... for not just.. running away when you turned 21-... I know you’ve been lonely the past few years-... and I hope that it will get better now-... that everything will get better from now on-...”

Woojin was crying too by now, gently pressing his brother closer, caressing his back. He didn’t know what to say, he had never known that Seungmin knew so much, that he had noticed all of that.

“I love you, Minnie….”, he finally whispered, still being at a loss for words. But it was enough for Seungmin.

“Love you, too, Wooj…”

They stayed like this for a while, silently, both dwelling in their own thoughts, before a knock on the door pulled them back to reality. Placing a kiss to Seungmin’s head, Woojin got up to open it.

“Hey. We just came back from the parlor and got some food on the way back.”, Chan smiled at him, before pressing the paper bag with take away into his hands.

“Thank you... “, Woojin replied, trying to hide his eyes behind his bangs, even though it was obvious that he had been crying and Chan had probably already seen it.

“No worries! We got a bit of everything cause we weren’t sure what you guys like… enjoy your meal!”

Gently putting his hand on Woojin’s shoulder he continued. “If you need any help, we’re right next door, ok? Don’t forget that…”

“Thank you, Chan… we know..”, Woojin replied and smiled, watching him leave before closing the door. 

He went back to the living room and placed the bag in front of Seungmin before turning towards the kitchen. “Can you unpack this already?”, he asked him while grabbing chopsticks and something to drink.

Seungmin was already a step ahead but instantly stopped when he saw various business cards on the bottom. 

“Uhm… hyung…?”, he said slightly insecure while retrieving them, closely inspecting what was written on the first.

“What’s that?”

“I… These were in the back… these are… therapist business cards…”

Seungmin looked up, handing one to his brother, who was equally stunned.

“You said you talked to Changbin about it? Did you… tell him about Seokjin…?”

“Yes… for him to understand why we are so wary about therapy... but I didn’t think they’d do this…? I mean… I know they’re helping us a lot, but I never expected them to.. I don’t know.. check out therapists for us…?”

Woojin nodded, he hadn’t expected that either, making the first step for them again so it would be easier.

“Seriously, Minnie.. I don’t know what we’d being doing without them.. probably staying at a shabby motel, looking for an even shabbier apartment…”

“Probably… thank god Jisung was in the bakery last week…”

“Yeah… but we should eat… we can look at the business cards later or tomorrow, ok?”

Seungmin nodded and took his chopsticks, slowly realising how hungry he’d been, sending a text to Changbin when Woojin went back into the kitchen to get them some bowls.

 **[Minnie]:** Thank you. For both. The food and the business cards.

 **[Binnie]:** np. hope it wasn’t too much?? 

**[Binnie]:** we talked abt it 2day at work n checked some out fy

 **[Binnie]:** Sungie went n got the cards

 **[Minnie]:** No it’s fine. Helps us a lot. Thank you again

Seungmin hesitated a moment before he send another text, blushing slightly.

 **[Minnie]:** Good night ♡´･ᴗ･`♡

“Are you alright?”, Woojin chuckled sitting down next to him, not having missed the look on his face.

“Mhm.. just texted Changbin to say thank you…”

“Ok… enjoy your meal, Minnie..”, the older replied, not pressing further. He knew that look on Seungmin’s face, he had been like that too before everything went downhill with Dohyun.

After the weekend Woojin finally went back to work and felt more rested than he ever had. He wasn’t scared to leave Seungmin behind anymore, knowing he was save and even if he needed help, Chan, Changbin and Jisung were right next door.

He still worked double-shifts, now using the bank account where he had saved the money for an apartment as Seungmin’s university fund. If he ever wanted to go it would going to be expensive and he wanted to have the money for at least a few semesters ready.  
Chan continued to visit him daily at the bakery, sometimes alone, sometimes with Changbin and Jisung, getting his coffee and maybe something to eat. 

Jimin was fussing over him every time, refusing to accept his payments since he was helping Woojin and Seungmin so much. Woojin loved seeing this daily argument, both of them coming up with the most ridiculous reasons for paying or not paying after a while, which made Woojin laugh, slowly realising that he was opening up more and more, becoming happier.

Which helped them a lot when the CPS invitation letter for their final interview eventually arrived, telling them that two workers would be visiting them within the next few days to see the place where they lived before the actual appointment was held. 

They showed Yang-sshi and her colleague around their small apartment, glad that they had started decorating it already to give it a more personal touch, before they wanted to speak to Changbin about the rent and assurance that they would be staying.

Woojin noticed Yang-sshi smiling during the whole procedure which continued at their meeting with the committee. It hurt to tell their life story again, to answer intimate questions and to see the police reports being shown, not knowing the outcome of this appointment. 

“It says here that your family had been visited by a CPS worker various times, is that correct?”, an elderly man with greying hair asked them.

“Yes.” Woojin’s voice was shaking of nervousness.

“But you stayed at home? Why didn’t you say something?”

Before Woojin could answer Yang-sshi interrupted. “Did a child ever speak up in front of its parents when there was a check up? Rarely, right? It’s not as easy as it sounds considering they were put through not only physical but emotional trauma as well. Woojin-sshi clearly stated that their parents were manipulating them before and after these appointments.”

The man nodded, looking through the file again before turning back to Woojin.

“I see… The apartment you rented is in an expensive district. Are you able to afford the rent every month?”

“Yes, sir… The apartment belongs to one of the regular customers of the bakery where I work. He’s.. he’s more like a friend now and we signed a contract that he won’t raise the rent.”, Woojin explained, pointing at one of the documents in front of them. 

“You are lucky that you found someone like that at the right time…”, another man said, reading through the mentioned contract.

“I think we have enough for now and both of you look like they need a break. Please stay near this room so we can call you back in after our decision. Since your case is urgent we are going to discuss it now.”, he added after they both had to answer a few more questions.

Woojin let out a shaky breath when they left the room, putting his arms around Seungmin and hugging him tightly, probably needing the support more than his younger brother.

“How did it go?”, Chan asked them, standing up from his chair, closely followed by Changbin and Jisung.

“I hope good… they are going to decide now and will call us back in when they’re done…”, Woojin answered, smiling weakly. 

The next minutes felt like the longest in their whole life even if Changbin would later swear that they hadn’t waited longer than 15 minutes until they had to go back into the meeting room.

Everyone smiled at them and even though it seemed to be a good sign it made Woojin extremely nervous. 

“After reviewing your case and looking at the documents you have provided us with we decided that you are capable of being the guardian of your younger brother. Congratulations, to both of you.”, the man with the greying hair announced and Woojin felt like the happiest person alive, feeling tears of happiness prick his eyes. 

When they finally left the room their waiting friends didn’t have to ask about the result, it was obvious, just looking at their relieved and happy faces.

“You did it!!”, Jisung exclaimed, jumping up and down before pulling them all into a big group hug, “I’m so happy for you! We should celebrate today!”

Woojin laughed happily, pulling Seungmin closer to his chest. They still had to check with CPS from time to time but for now everything would be fine.

Or so Woojin thought.

Their situation stayed stable for a while, they found their daily rhythm, calmed down and focused on getting better with a therapist. The one they had finally chosen was a woman in her mid-forties and seemed to genuinely care about them and their well-being. 

Woojin had to visit twice a week and looking back and reappraising the abuse and untold trauma was taking its toll. He had good days, where everything seemed fine, where he was laughing with the others and where they stayed long in the apartment next door. However, on his bad days he couldn’t stand anyone else’s presence except for Seungmin’s. It was hard to get out of bed at 2:30 in the morning and he had troubles to concentrate at work, which is why he sometimes left early or didn’t go at all, calling in sick. It made the days even worse, making him hate himself even more, even though Jimin was understanding and continued to pay him his full salary.

It was on one of these days when he met Dohyun again while getting home from grocery shopping.

“Oh? Shouldn’t you be at work, Woojinnie?”, he asked with a smug grin, blocking his way to the front door.

Woojin sighed. From all the people in the world, he was the last he had wanted to see. 

“Leave me alone, Dohyun. And don’t call me that. You lost that right long ago.” He hated how emotionless and blank his voice sounded in that moment, but he couldn’t change it, even if he wanted to.

Dohyun’s grin only grew wider while cornering him. 

“Did you lose your job or something?”

Woojin felt the wall in his back, trying to find a way out of this far too well-known situation. His hands were trembling and he felt his pulse quicken.

“Leave me alone… please…”, he managed to get out shakily, hating himself for showing how weak he was, giving Dohyun what he wanted. 

“How are you paying your rent now? Prostitution? I bet you like getting fucked by that silver-haired dude. Didn’t think you could sink this low, Woojinnie…”

Woojin could feel his hot breath on his skin, even though he wasn’t touching him. His whole body was shaking and frozen in place. He wanted to run away but he couldn’t, fear controlling his body.

“Does Minnie know….?”

“EY! Get away from him!”

“Oh? Looks like your prince in his shining armour is here~...”, Dohyun whispered before taking a step back, smiling innocently at Chan.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?!”, the tattooist asked, stepping protectively between Dohyun and Woojin, feeling the latter clutch to his leather jacket weakly. 

“We were just talking. We’re old friends, you know.”, Dohyun answered, the smug grin never leaving his face. 

“Didn’t look like talking to me!”

Dohyun put his hands up in defence. “I don’t know what you’ve seen. I haven’t touched him.” Woojin felt sick when he turned to him again. “It was nice to see you again, Woojinnie. Have a nice day.”

Chan watched the other walk away as if nothing had happened, still fuming with anger, only calming on the surface before turning to face Woojin.

“Did he hurt you? What has he done?!”, he asked, skipping the question if everything was alright. It was more than obvious from Woojin’s tears that he wasn’t okay.

The older shook his head. “N-no… please… don’t tell Seungmin, okay-...?”

Chan sighed and pulled him into a hug, gently caressing his back and feeling Woojin hold onto him as if his life depended on it.

“I won’t… let’s go upstairs okay…?”, he whispered, never stopping to hold him close until they stood in front of the apartment.

“Do you want me to stay with you until Minnie comes home?”

Woojin shook his head again. “No… It’s fine… thank you…”, he answered weakly before fleeing into his safe space, quickly closing the door behind him. All he wanted to do was lie down and cry.

Chan just stood there and sighed again. He only went back home because he forgot his phone and he needed it for the day. Now, he was glad he had forgotten it, he didn’t want to know what would have happened to Woojin if he hadn’t stepped in. 

He just wished he could help him more, could protect him from everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm kinda back? Probably not really right now but I finally wanted to upload this chapter.  
> Writers block is hitting me really hard right but I really hope I can get back into writing as soon as I have less stress :/
> 
> Still, I hope you liked this chapter! I liked it when I first wrote it but now I'm not actually sure anymore ㅠㅠ but it's also probably my head that's telling me this right now especialyl cause there's a lot happening in this chapter!  
> Also, I have no idea how CPS works in reality but I didn't want to leave it out completely.
> 
> Also I'm so excited to have a Europe unveil now ㅠㅠ But at the same time I'm so damn anxious that I'm not getting any tickets. Though I'm gonna be an irresponsible adult with this anyways. Anyone else trying to go?
> 
> Thank you so much for reading ♥ comments and kudos are highly appreciated ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 9:  
> \- overdosing  
> \- drowning  
> \- suicidal thoughts

Woojin talked about his encounter with Dohyun to his therapist a few days later at the end of their session. He didn’t want to, but he knew he needed to talk about it to get better, to not let it haunt him anymore.

“How did you feel?”

“Weak… I couldn’t do anything. I wanted to run away but I felt like a deer in headlights.”

“Because it reminded you of your father?”

Woojin exhaled shakily. “Probably…”

She nodded and noted something down on the paper in front of her.

“And you said the bad days are getting more and worse?”

“Yes…”

“Why?”

“I don’t know… maybe... because the trial is soon... And we have to face our parents again…”

To say Woojin was afraid of it was an understatement. Only thinking about it nearly pushed him into a panic attack, the fear consuming him and clouding his mind. He was afraid that he couldn’t do it, that he had to watch his parents walk free and that his life would turn into hell once again.

He looked at the prescription in his hands when he left the practice half an hour later and sighed. She had already put him on antidepressants but the new ones were stronger and she instructed him to take them until the trial was over and then they would see if he still needed them.

Walking to the pharmacy he texted Seungmin, hoping that he wouldn’t worry him too much.

 **[Big Bro ʕ·͡ᴥ·ʔ]:** I’ll be home soon. Got new meds and have to get them. Do we need anything? 

**[Minnie]:** New meds? 

**[Minnie]:** And we don’t need anything 

**[Big Bro ʕ·͡ᴥ·ʔ]:** Yeah. Stronger ones until the trial is over. Don’t worry, okay? Nothing will happen. 

**[Minnie]:** Ok >.<

 **[Minnie]:** I’m at Changbin’s btw 

Woojin smiled a bit. Of course he was at Changbin’s. Not at Chan’s or Jisung’s. It was always Changbin’s. He had to be blind to not see what was going on.

Seungmin liked Changbin. A lot. And from what he saw Changbin definitely liked him back. He knew it was just a matter of time. 

He still remembered the night a while ago when Seungmin had cuddled up to him and had asked what it was like to fall in love. Woojin didn’t like to remember the consequences but the one time he had fallen in love had felt great. And that’s what he had told him, even though he probably knew less about it than Seungmin.

Woojin quickly got his new medication and bought some snacks on his way home after Jisung had texted him. He knocked on their door as soon as he got there, smiling a bit when Seungmin opened it and hugged him.

“Hyung! Jisung can’t wait for the snacks. Thank god you brought some! Thank you”, he laughed when Woojin handed them to him.

“No problem…”, he ruffled through Seungmin’s hair. “Have fun ok? Text me in case you stay the night, will you?”

Seungmin’s smile vanished from his face.

“Aren’t you staying? We wanted to watch a movie together…”

Woojin shook his head. “I’m drained… today’s session was pretty exhausting… sorry… next time okay?”

“Is it really okay if stay?” Worry was written all over Seungmin’s face.

“Of course, Minnie… say Hi to the others, will you?”

Woojin placed a kiss to his hair before turning around and going into their apartment. His body hurt from all the tension of the day. He needed a bath and then his bed, secretly hoping that Seungmin would stay with Changbin. He loved him but each day felt more tiring and he felt like he needed time for himself.

Grabbing a bottle of water he made his way to the bathroom, and let the bathtub fill with water and lavender scented bath salts while taking one pill of his new medication as he was instructed to do.

* * *

Seungmin went back inside and placed the snacks on the coffee table.

“Where’s Woojin-hyung?”, Jisung asked, already grabbing the bag to look inside.

“Next door. The therapy session was exhausting and he’s tired he said… Probably not in the best mood anyways cause he got new meds…”, Seungmin answered and sat down next to Changbin again.

“New meds?”

“Mhm… stronger ones… he’s… he’s not doing well lately… with the trial coming up and I don’t know… he’s been even more silent in the last few days and doesn’t even talk to me… I asked him what’s on his mind but… yeah… he’s not telling me…”, he explained, smiling sadly. He knew Woojin was hiding something but he didn’t want to pressure him into telling him, hoping that he’d do on his own soon. 

“He didn’t say anything?”, Changbin asked, carefully caressing the younger’s back. It was obvious that Seungmin was hurt.

“No… only ever saying that it’s okay and that I don’t have to worry… I mean I know he’s afraid of the trial… I am, too… but I don’t think that’s all… There’s something else and he’s not telling me… it’s the first time he’s not telling me something…”

Seungmin sighed. “I’m probably reading too much into it, though… with the trial and everything… it’s probably just too much at the moment and he needs his quiet time to focus and calm down.” 

He smiled again, talking himself into believing his own words. But he was deadly afraid that history would repeat itself. The parallels were there and every alarm bell in Seungmin’s mind was shrieking. It was so familiar. Therapy. New medication because the old ones hadn’t been strong enough. And shortly after Woojin had found Seokjin in the bathtub, having overdosed and drowned.

“Should we start the movie?”, he eventually asked, pulling himself out of the memories and the rest nodded. He hoped it would distract him from his dark thoughts.

* * *

Woojin closed his eyes after he had stepped into the tub, feeling the tension leave his body, starting to relax and giving in to the silence and warmth. It was what he needed. Time for himself, to think, to calm down, to try to figure out what the future was holding for them.

He didn’t know how long he was in the water already, but he felt it getting slightly colder. He wanted to open his eyes and get up, but he couldn’t. Tiredness had claimed his body and it felt like someone had put weights on him, he couldn’t move.

He knew he couldn’t fall asleep here, knew what would happen. He couldn’t do this to Seungmin.

But as much as he tried, his body wouldn’t listen, wouldn’t move one centimeter and he felt himself drifting off more and more, felt the water creep up his chest, shoulders and neck.

And suddenly he wasn’t afraid anymore, and instead welcomed the warmth surrounding him.

* * *

Chan tried to focus on the movie, but his mind would always wander to the man in the apartment next to theirs. He knew Woojin hadn’t talked to Seungmin about his encounter with Dohyun and he feared that he had met him again.

“I think I forgot something… I’ll be right back”, he mumbled a few minutes into the movie and got up. “Minho, could you help me real quick?”

Minho looked up and nodded when he saw the look on Chan’s face, having the same uneasy feeling as the older. He followed him out of the apartment.

“I don’t trust this, Minho... I don’t think Woojin should be alone right now… What if he met Dohyun again and didn’t tell anyone?”, Chan mumbled, already making his way to Woojin’s apartment, knocking on the door. He had talked to Minho about Dohyun, knowing that he could trust him with this information enough that he wouldn't tell anyone else.

“I really hope he didn’t…”, Minho replied, knocking on the door again when nobody opened. “Do you think he went to bed already?”

“I don’t know… or he really doesn’t want to see anyone… in any case I want to make sure he’s okay.”

Chan took out the spare card and opened the door, darkness greeting them. His gut feeling had never let him down so far and this time it really wasn’t good.

“Woojin?”, he called into the dark apartment after closing the door but getting no answer.

“I’ll check the bedroom..”, Minho said, already making his way down the hall.

Chan on the other hand checked the living room when he saw the light from under the gap of the bathroom door. He knocked.

“Woojin? Are you in there?”, he asked, waiting for an answer, watching Minho coming back and indicating to him to stop.

“Woojin, it’s me Chan. I’m coming in…”, he said and slowly opened the door, peeking inside. 

But nothing could’ve prepared him for what he would see.

“Fuck!!”

He pushed the bathroom door open and ran to the bathtub, pulling Woojin’s seemingly lifeless body out of the water. The older instantly started coughing, waking up to the air replacing the water in his lungs.

“Chan-...?”

“Fuck, Woojin! What the fuck were you doing?!”

“Have you taken your new meds?!”, Minho asked with panic in his voice, inspecting the container of pills in the sink, calming down a bit when he noticed that not many were missing.

“Yes-...”

“For fucks sake, Woojin! You nearly drowned yourself!”

“Chan…”, Minho put a hand on his shoulder. “It was probably an accident… there aren’t a lot missing…”, he turned to Woojin “we’re waiting in the living room for you, okay?”

The baker nodded, still in shock of what just happened and what he remembered thinking. He waited until he was alone again and finally stepped out of the bathtub, toweling himself dry and getting dressed. 

Before he left the bathroom he looked back at the tub, calmly watching the water disappear. He could’ve died in there if Chan and Minho hadn’t found him. He would’ve let Seungmin down. Oddly enough he felt content with it.

“Woojin, what were you thinking?”, Chan asked him as soon as he set foot into the living room, the younger now being a lot calmer, but more worriedly. 

“I don’t know…”

“You nearly drowned! You can’t take your new meds just like that, not knowing what effect they’ll have on you!”

“Please don’t tell, Seungmin…”

“Fucking hell I do. Of course I’m going to tell him! Woojin, Seungmin is worried about you! He thinks you’re hiding something and I know you haven’t told him about Dohyun. It can’t go on like that!”

Chan was standing in front of him now, watching him with sad eyes while Woojin continued to stare at the floor. 

“You’re hiding something… Something is wrong…”

“Of course something is wrong!!” Woojin finally snapped and looked up, tears streaming down his face.

“Everything is wrong, Chan! I nearly drowned! And the only thing on my mind was that it would’ve been okay when I realised I couldn’t get up anymore! That it wouldn’t be a loss to the world! No one would’ve cared anyways!”

Both Chan and Minho looked at him in shock, not having expected such an outburst. Minho was the first to find his voice again. “We care, Woojin. Especially Seungmin. He needs you.”

“Seungmin doesn’t need me anymore. He’s got you and… and Changbin… he doesn’t need me-...”

“Of course he does. You’re his brother, his family, his best friend. You’re the most important person he has…”, Chan finally said, taking the sobbing man in front of him into his arms, maneuvering him to the couch to sit him down. Minho put one of the blankets around his shoulders, sitting down on his other side.

“We all care about you… and we’re all worried when you distance yourself so much… it will be better soon, okay? When the trial is over and when you can finally calm down and leave everything behind…”

Woojin was still sobbing, shaking his head.

“Nothing will be okay-... I’m going to lose custody of Seungmin again-...”

“Hey… you won’t… you’re going to win that trial and then it will be over…”, Minho reassured him, gently caressing his back.

“And CPS can’t do anything to you… you won that too…”

Instead of calming down, Woojin cried even more, sobbing heartbreakingly. Chan was at a loss of words and looked at Minho, who seemed to be as helpless as he was. They stayed like this for a while, gently caressing Woojin’s back and trying to calm him down. It took him some time but eventually the sobbing stopped.

“Better…?”, Chan asked carefully.

Woojin shook his head again. “No…” He took a small pause, trying to compose himself but tears started to fill his eyes again.

“I… I lost my job....”

“What? Why? You’ve been working there for so long and… in this situation… Jimin can’t just fire you…!” Chan looked at him in shock. He never expected Jimin to be like that, to leave him hanging in such a hard time.

“It’s not her fault… it’s… Dohyun bought the bakery….”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you haven't noticed but the D in Dohyun stand for dick.
> 
> Also I'm sorry? For what happens in this chapter? Be prepared for more feels in the next one though
> 
> I still haven't gotten completely rid of my writer block yet. At least not for this fic and it annoys me. That's why I'm currently writing on another one cause it's easier at the moment. Though I have planned out the the cnewest chapter (ch 13) I'm writing for this one but every word I put down sound like shit and I probably have to rewwrite everything OTL It's annoying af
> 
> I hope you liked the chapter! Let me know in the comments what you think ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 10:  
> \- homophobia  
> \- mentioned (physical) abuse and suicide

Chan stayed silent, staring at Woojin in shock.

“He did what…?”, Minho asked, not trusting in what he just heard.

“He bought the bakery-...”

“Fuck…”, he whispered, pulling the shaking baker into his arms again. “Why…?”

But before Woojin could answer, Chan’s phone started chiming.

 **[Bin]:** Where r u? 

**[Bin]:** U’ve been gone for ages

 **[CB]:** at Woojin’s. Crisis meeting. Come over. Now.

It didn’t take long until the door opened and Seungmin came rushing in, panic written all over his face. He sank to his knees in front of his brother, taking his hands into his own. 

“Woojin, are you alright? What happened?”

Woojin smiled a bit and brushed gently through his hair. He didn’t know how to tell him, didn’t want to worry him too much. But he knew there was no way around it, he had to be straight forward.

“I lost my job, Seungmin… Dohyun bought the bakery…”

“He… he what-...? Why…?” Seungmin was as shocked as everyone else, not having expected this, forgetting about the voices in his head that were telling him that more was going on.

Woojin sighed and lowered his gaze.

“I’ve known for a while that Jimin has to sell the bakery… her mother is sick and they’re going to move to Jeju by the end of the month… she said she found someone who is willing to buy the bakery from her and agreed to continue to employ everyone working there. Until this week… the bakery will close down completely and… she can’t do anything against it…”

“Fuck…”, Seungmin whispered, being at a loss for words. “Why..? It’s not like he’s gaining anything…”

“To spite me, Minnie… because he hates me! He doesn’t care about the bakery or anything. It’s just because of me! I thought everything would get better now but instead he’s the one making my life hell. I can’t do anything against it! He’s just continuing what he’s started all these years ago! I’ve done nothing wrong!”

Seungmin carefully got up and put his arms around his shaking brother, trying to give him the comfort he needed.

“I know…”, he whispered. He wished he could do anything. Anything to prevent this from happening, anything to protect Woojin.

“Why can’t he let me be? I don’t even know how he found me! Or how he found out that Jimin has to sell the bakery-... I just don’t get it…”

“What happened between you and him…?”, Chan finally asked what everyone was dying to know. Everyone knew there were hard feelings involved, but neither Woojin nor Seungmin had let anything slip so far. 

“If you want to tell us of course…”

Woojin sighed. It wouldn’t change the situation if he told them but maybe it would make his heart a bit lighter, would maybe lift a bit of pressure from his shoulders. No one knew except for Seungmin. And maybe… maybe they could help him through this.

“It… It had started in middle school… he was my best friend back then…”, he started before pausing again, thinking about how he could phrase everything.

“I liked him. A lot. And it looked like he liked me back. It had started subtle, he was paying more attention to me, approaching me more often and… suddenly there was a lot more skinship than usual. It felt good and… I felt safe. He was… kind of my safe place… so… I confessed to him before middle school ended…”

Woojin looked at his hands. It hurt to remember because so much had happened in that time.

“It didn’t end well, right…?”, Minho asked, gently taking one of his hands. Woojin shook his head.

“No… at first it was okay, though… he asked me to wait for him. He said he wasn’t ready to come out yet… I believed him… I didn’t want to rush him… so I agreed and told him I would wait…”

He paused again, clutching at Seungmin’s hand.

“Shortly after… Seokjin commited suicide… of course word got around quickly and Dohyun was the shoulder I could lean on… I told him everything about the abuse and how our lives were. He promised me to help as soon as the final exams were over, promising me to ask his parents for money and help so Seungmin and I could get out…. I was so naive back then. I believed him and thought we… thought we actually would get out…”

Woojin closed his eyes for a second, trying to calm his nerves and shaking hands. Luckily Seungmin and Minho were still holding them. 

“Of course nothing happened… I got the job at the bakery after middle school and started working. Slowly everyone of my friends stopped contacting me saying it was because I was only working now… Dohyun stayed… and told me it was because someone had found out I was gay and… it is still frowned upon, right…? I believed him. I never once questioned his motifs or thought he wanted to harm me… about half a year after middle school had ended he wanted to take me out on a date and… it was so horrible…”

He hadn’t noticed the tears streaming down his face, only noticed when Seungmin carefully wiped them away, being close to tears himself.

“He had promised me the world and told me he would stand up against our friends who had abandoned me… I went over to his house after work and it had looked like we were alone. We were in the living room and we talked. Just talked… about my feelings for him, about the abuse, about Seokjin and Seungmin… I felt safe to tell him, to talk about everything because he always gave me the feeling I could trust him…”

He was shaking violently again, the memories so clear and vivid before his eyes. 

“He told me again he would help and be by my side… and leaned in to kiss me. I really thought that was the moment everything would change. And it did. But not for the better. He stopped so close before me that I could feel his breath on my skin and his whole demeanor changed. He started laughing and told me how ridiculous and embarrassing I was and how I could actually think that someone would help me, that someone could love me… someone who was as damaged as me… and then I heard the laughter from the kitchen-... everyone had been there-… I hadn’t noticed them filming-... Dohyun told me they were going to show everyone how miserable I was and… I wanted to run away but the front door was locked… it had been the only time someone who wasn’t our father had beat me up-...”

He felt Seungmin pull him closer, before he also felt Chan’s arms around him. 

“That’s so horrible… I’m so sorry, Woojin… you didn’t deserve this… Just because you’re gay…?”

Woojin sobbed and nodded slightly.

“Just because I’m gay. That was enough for them… They had suspected it and… that’s why Dohyun had started all of this… and why he’s continuing…”

Changbin looked at him with sad eyes. He couldn’t believe what he just heard, what Woojin just told them.

“And… and still you trusted us so easily…”

Woojin looked up. 

“I didn’t have another chance, did I…? I did it for Seungmin... everything was better than staying with our parents… even if nothing of this would’ve worked out. I’d rather had lived on the streets than going back... I’ve seen you so much at the bakery and.. I just hoped I could trust you when Jisung offered us to stay here… it was pure desperation…”

“And thank god we could…”, Seungmin whispered, “It was the first time we were lucky in our life…”

“It will get better… we promised you, right? And we’ll do everything we can because you of all people deserve it so much-... what Dohyun did to you was so wrong on so many levels-... he won’t be able to harm you anymore, Woojin. I promise you. And I never break my promises.”, Chan was shaking and crying with sadness and anger. It would take all he had in him to not just beat Dohyun up when they would cross paths the next time. He knew from the beginning that Dohyun would mean nothing but troubles but he had never expected him to be so sick and perverted to do this to his best friend, to humiliate and degrade him like this. 

He took a deep breath when he felt Jisung’s hand on his shoulders, trying to calm himself again. 

“You shouldn’t sleep alone tonight… none of us should…”, Jisung said, looking at all of them in turns. 

And as much as Woojin had wanted to be alone this evening, he was now glad that he’d have company for the night, that he hadn’t had to go through it alone, that everyone was still by his and Seungmin’s side.

He followed them into their apartment, automatically turning towards the spare bedroom when Jisung stopped him.

“Nope… we’re sleeping on the couch tonight. It’s going to be a bit cramped with six people but it’ll work. We sometimes do that. We actually only invested in a couch like this to use it for sleepovers”, he said.

Woojin was confused. He knew their couch was big but he was sure that not even four people would fit. That was until Chan put the pillows aside and started to convert it into a bed. It was gigantic. And, yes, it would be cramped but it would be enough for six people to sleep on.

Minho and Changbin were already grabbing every blanket and pillow in the apartment while Chan and Jisung put the cover over the couch, building what Woojin slightly reminded of a nest. It looked comfortable and like he would be able to find some rest even though he was slightly nervous. He had only ever shared his bed with his brothers. This was going to be different.

It didn’t take long until everyone found their place to sleep. Changbin and Minho were on each side, Seungmin between Changbin and his brother. Chan had chosen the spot next to him so that Jisung would be stuck between him and Minho. At first it was hot and Woojin still felt a bit uncomfortable, but he tried to stay as still as possible to not wake anyone up again. 

The room was illuminated by the moon shining through the gap in the curtains and he watched Seungmin for a while, looking so tiny and calm. He smiled a bit when he saw him cuddle up to Changbin. Maybe he didn’t need him to protect him anymore, but he still needed his older brother, needed someone to lean on and talk about his teenager problems. Surely, he now also had Changbin and Woojin would count the days until they got together, but there were things he wouldn’t be able to talk about with him, where he needed to rely on Woojin. 

He closed his eyes and tried to fall asleep, but his mind was still running about the things that had happened today and the things that would be happening soon. He had to find a job, the trial was the upcoming week and he did not have the slightest idea how he was able to avoid Dohyun. He was afraid about what he would do, if he would turn on him again, hurt him again. The others weren’t able to be by his side 24/7 to protect him from Dohyun.

He sighed and opened his eyes again when he heard Chan move behind him.

“Can’t sleep?”, the younger asked in a hushed voice, careful not to wake anyone.

“Not really… it was too much today… my mind won’t calm down…”, Woojin answered silently, closing his eyes again when he felt Chan rub circles on his back.

“I know… thank you for telling us though… it must’ve been hard…”

Woojin only nodded. It had been. He had known that he never really had forgotten about it but he hadn’t expected it to be still so vivid in his mind after all this years, that he still remember every single detail of this day.

He opened his eyes again when Chan put his arms around him and gently pressed him closer to his chest, their bodies aligning perfectly. 

“You’re safe with us, Woojin… No one will hurt you anymore. We’ll find you a new job and we’ll help you and Seungmin through the next weeks. And if Dohyun ever tries to hurt you again, he’s going to have the shock of his life. I told you I was kind of a delinquent in my teens… and I still got my contacts from that time…”

Woojin couldn’t suppress a quiet chuckle.

“Thank you, Chan…”, he whispered.

“You’re welcome… try to sleep now okay…? You need it… Tomorrow is another day...”

“Goodnight, Chan…”

“Night, Woojin…”

Woojin closed his eyes for the millionth time this night and gave in to the warmth spreading through his body thanks to Chan. He, indeed, was safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I mention that Dohyun is a dick?  
> So yeah, that's the backstory~ Let me know what you think of it!
> 
> Tbh I don't know what else to say about this chapter... I hope you liked it!  
> Thank you so much for reading!
> 
> I might upload another Woochan AU in the next one or two weeks with only a three or four chapters. About Woochan being childhood friends that grew up in an orphanage together and meet agan ten years later. You may have seen the prompt on [Sher's](https://twitter.com/woogibearx) thread of Woochan prompts on twitter :) So idk stay tuned if you wanna know about that one ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 11:  
> \- talking about everything that has happened before (overdosing, suicide, (accidental) drowning, suicidal thoughts)

Woojin slowly woke up when he felt the sun shine into his face the next morning, wondering how it got through the drawn curtains. He kept his eyes closed when he realised that the apartment was silent around him, everyone still seemingly asleep. He sighed, enjoying the warmth surrounding him, Chan’s arms, that were still wrapped around his body and his even breath tickling the back of his neck.

He felt like he belonged here. Not only in this apartment and in this group of friends, but precisely in Chan’s arms, pressed close to his chest with only the thin blanket between them. He felt safe and loved and he wished time would stand still so that he could enjoy this feeling forever.

He was close to falling asleep again when he heard the muffled voice from the balcony. Carefully he opened his eyes, blinking a few times to adjust to the light and the sunshine in his face before he sat up slightly to peak outside. Minho was walking back and forth on the balcony, talking to someone on the phone eagerly. 

Feeling Chan stirr behind him and pressing him closer, he lay down again, wondering what made the barista get up so early. It was shortly after nine and it didn’t look like anyone would wake up soon anyways.

Woojin looked over at Seungmin who was still fast asleep in Changbin’s arms, having his face buried at his chest and if he saw it right they were now sharing their blanket, the other one lying crumpled behind the youngest. He smiled. Seungmin’s happiness was the most important thing to him and if he was happy, Woojin could be too. It just might take longer for him. 

“Oh, you’re awake… did I wake you up?”, Minho’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts again and he looked at the younger sitting at his feet.

“No, don’t worry… I woke up on my own… I’m not used to sleep this long actually…”, he answered and sat up again, smiling at Chan’s displeased noises. 

Minho chuckled. “Same… I don’t get how all of them can sleep until noon. I’m always the first to get up when I’m here. It’s nice not being the only one up for a change. Join me in the kitchen?”

Woojin watched Minho get up and followed him shortly after, silently closing the glass sliding door that separated the kitchen from the living room.

“Coffee?”, Minho asked him as soon as the door was closed.

“Yes, please…”

They stayed silent while Minho prepared a cup of coffee for each of them and Woojin watched in fascination. He knew how the barista coffee machine worked since they had had a similar one at Jimin’s bakery, but neither of them were trained baristas like Minho. His movements were smooth and without much thought, knowing exactly what he had to do. He could watch him for hours.

Minho chuckled again when he noticed. 

“I forced them to buy this machine. The first time I had slept here after Jisung and I got together they only had this disgusting instant coffee. It was probably a bit mean to tell Sungie I’d break up with him again if they didn’t get a proper coffee machine but it obviously worked.”

Woojin smiled and chuckled slightly. This really sounded like a thing Minho would say and do.

“How did you meet?”, Woojin finally asked when Minho sat down with him, sipping at his coffee.

“Hm… you’re not gonna tell anyone, right? Jisung thinks it’s embarrassing.”

Woojin shook his head. “If you don’t want me to…”

The younger smiled. “Good… we met on Grindr. I was actually just looking for a good fuck when he messaged me. Never thought I’d find the love of my life there…”

Woojin looked at him in surprise. He hadn’t expected this. It didn’t shock him but it was also not what he had expected. And still, it was kind of cute.

“To be honest, at first I thought he’d just be another one-night-stand, so I invited him over to my apartment. I fell head over heels for him when he stood in front of me, being a lot cuter than his profile picture had shown him to be. In the end we just talked through the night and got to know each other, went on a few more dates until we both realised we had feelings for each other…”, Minho continued, smiling fondly at the memories.

“It’s a cute story… probably a bit unusual but unique…”

“Right? That’s what I’ve been telling him too, but he never listens! I still don’t know though what his virgin ass was doing on a dating website, but I’m glad he found me there!”

Minho laughed and Woojin joined him shortly after. He couldn’t imagine Jisung scrolling through these apps but every coin had another side and he was sure that there was a side to Jisung that he hadn’t met yet, and probably never would but that was fine with him.

They calmed down after a few minutes and Woojin was amazed that the others were still sleeping. They hadn’t been exactly quiet. He looked over at Seungmin and smiled again, he hadn’t been so calm in a long time.

“You should talk to him…”

“Hm?”

“About yesterday. And about Dohyun threatening you.”

“How… how do you know…?”, Woojin looked at Minho in surprise and shock about the sudden topic change. He hadn’t told him about it. The only one who knew about it was… Chan. He looked back towards the living room.

“Don’t be mad at him. He’s worried about you and needed someone to talk to. So he told me. And Seungmin’s worried too. And we can’t be with you 24/7, but Minnie can most of the time. He needs to know how your new meds affect you… that they make you tired and maybe more what we don’t know yet…”

“It’s not that easy, Minho… I know I have to tell him. I just don’t know how…”, he sighed and stared down at his coffee, shaking his head.

“It’s already bad enough that it happened and… that I was kind of okay with it, but…”, Woojin looked up again, not hiding the sadness in his voice, “it’s just getting worse because that’s the way our brother killed himself. It was the same situation. Therapy. New meds. Overdosing and taking a bath…”

Minho looked at him with sad eyes, gently taking his hands in his own. “But you didn’t overdose, Woojin. It was an accident. You didn’t intend to take your own life. And that’s the difference. He needs to know. Because as much as you take care of him, you need him to take care of you. And he can only do that if you’re honest with each other. We don’t need to know everything but Seungmin does.”

Woojin looked at their hands, nodding slightly. 

“I know… I will talk to him… but I need to figure out how…”

“If you need us to we can stay with you. If that makes it easier. Just think about it okay? But don’t push it away. The longer it takes you to talk about it the harder it gets…”

The baker nodded again. Minho was right. He had to tell Seungmin, had to be honest with him, even though it was hard and would worry him even more.

“Thank you, Minho…”

“That’s what friends are for… don’t thank me…”, Minho smiled at him but stopped, thinking for a second, “Well… don’t thank me yet but maybe in five minutes if you hear me out.”

Minho sat up straight and looked over at Woojin. 

“You know that I’m going to open a coffee shop soon, right? And actually I thought that I would just order the pastries from somewhere to get them delivered everyday. But, and that’s where you come into the scene, the kitchen isn’t completely done yet and I made some calls earlier and it is possible to put everything in that you’d need to bake there. So, if you want to, and honestly I can understand if you don’t want to, I’ll hire you. You don’t have to answer right away but think about it. The job is safe for you, I’m not going to look for someone else until I have an answer from you.”

Woojin was staring back in disbelief. Was he serious? Was he really offering him a job over a shared cup of coffee?

“I-...”, he started but stopped again. He was speechless, had never expected such an offer.

“You don’t have to decide right now, Woojin. But just know that I’m not only doing this because I feel sorry for you and Seungmin and because I’m worried. I’m also doing it because I know that you’re a fantastic baker. Jisung never shuts up about the pastries they bought at your old job and I had enough time to try it myself. And we have some kind of chemistry together, so I’m sure we can work alongside each other.”

Minho was serious. It was obvious from the look on his face.

“I’ll do it.”, Woojin eventually answered, being as serious as Minho. He knew that this was a chance he couldn’t let go to waste. Even with a recommendation letter from Jimin it would take him some time to find a new job. And he had to admit to himself that he wasn’t in the right condition for job hunting right now. This was his once in a lifetime chance. 

“Really? Are you sure?”

“Yes. 100 percent sure.”

“Perfect!”, Minho was beaming at him and pulled him into a tight hug.

“This is going to be amazing, I know it! You won’t regret that decision, Woojin! Wait here. I’m grabbing my laptop from Jisung’s room and we’ll draw up the contract.”

He left the kitchen only to return a minute later with said object under his arm. They worked on the contract together, talking about Woojin’s salary, how many days of vacation he got in a year and how many hours a day he’d be working, what he needed to do and learn and all the other important conditions that they had to note down until the door opened and a still sleepy looking Seungmin walked in.

“Morning….”, he mumbled while flopping down on Woojin’s lap, leaning onto him and trying not to fall asleep again. Woojin put his arms around him.

“Good morning, Minnie… how did you sleep?”, he asked.

“Good… like a baby… Have you been up for long...?”

Woojin checked the clock over the stove, but Minho was quicker.

“About three hours. Woojin for about two…”

Seungmin looked at them in surprise.

“So long? Why didn’t you wake us? What have you been doing in that time?”

Minho smirked, quickly glancing over at Woojin before turning to the younger again.

“We had a job interview.”

“Job interview?”, Seungmin seemed to be even more confused now. Woojin chuckled.

“Kind of. We talked and long story short Minho offered me a job as a baker at his coffee shop as soon as it opens and I accepted.”

It took Seungmin a moment to realise what it meant, but as soon as he had finally processed this information he let out a high pitched scream and hugged Woojin tight.

“Hyung, that’s amazing!!”, he said, laughing happily but jumped slightly when Chan, Changbin and Jisung came tumbling into the kitchen, obviously having been woken up by Seungmin’s outcry of joy.

“Is everything alright?!”, Changbin asked while storming into the room, looking around worriedly and startled.

“Yes… Sorry I didn’t want to wake you…”, Seungmin answered, a faint blush colouring his cheeks.

“Minnie is just happy that I found myself a baker for the coffee shop in the easiest way possible…”, Minho chuckled while pulling Jisung on his lap before quickly explaining the situation, eliciting the same reaction from the three artists.

Woojin smiled happily, feeling that this day was going to be a good one after the trainwreck from the day before. He leaned onto his younger brother, knowing he still had to talk to him but ultimately deciding that it could wait another few hours.

Until it couldn’t anymore. He knew Seungmin was still worried, thinking that Woojin wouldn’t notice how he was looking at him from time to time. So when Minho left them alone in the kitchen a few hours later, closing the glass sliding door behind him, he knew that he had to do it now. 

He sighed anxiously, trying to mask it with a little smile on his face.

“Seungmin…? I need to tell you something… actually… a few things I’ve been not telling you lately… besides that Jimin is closing the bakery…”

Seungmin sat down in front of him on the kitchen isle, watching him with worried eyes. 

“I knew you were hiding something from me… but why…? You never did and…. more than one thing…?”, he said, trying to not sound accusing and hurt. 

“I didn’t want to worry you… you’ve been doing so great lately compared to me and the therapy is working. You’re happier than I’ve seen you in years…”

“But it worries me even more when I know that something’s up and you’re not telling me, Woojin… Please never hide anything from me okay…?”

Woojin nodded. “I’ll try, Minnie… I’m sorry…”

He looked at the glass of water in front of him, not knowing what to say or how to phrase it, only averting his gaze when Seungmin took his hands.

“Take your time, hyung…”

He nodded again, sorting his thoughts before he started speaking, telling Seungmin what had happened.

“I ran into Dohyun again… outside the apartment building… I’m... so afraid to leave the house at the moment because I don’t know what he’s going to do when no one interferes… he cornered me and… I’m just thankful that Chan came home early and saw it…”, he explained, trying to stay as calm as possible while holding onto Seungmin’s hands.

“I’m afraid that he’s going to hurt me again… I’m pretty sure he has told everyone else that he found me again and knows where I live… I’ve talked to our therapist about it and besides the upcoming trial that’s also why she put me on stronger meds for now…”

“I won’t let him hurt you again, hyung.”, Seungmin answered earnestly with a look of determination on his face that Woojin had never seen. “You’ve protected me for so long and took everything upon you. It’s my turn now and I know Chan, Changbin, Jisung and Minho are going to help me.”

Woojin smiled a bit, squeezing his brother’s hands slightly. “Thank you… but it’s… you know it’s not that easy… You can’t be around me 24/7…”

“We’ll figure something out… and maybe if you get back to your old meds after the trial and when everything is finally over and we’re less anxious… maybe you don’t struggle to fight back anymore and can defend yourself… and if not I’m sure we can take a self-defense class…”  
He had actually thought about that too, taking some kind of martial arts or self-defense class in case Dohyun actually tried to hurt him again. He just didn’t want to sink that low and hurt him back, not even after everything he had done to him. 

“Maybe we can actually look into that when the trial is over… but… talking about the meds… I’m not sure if I switch back after the trial… Lee-sshi said it might be but it depends on how I’m doing… but in any case… you have to look after me after I took them… they make me extremely tired…”

“I can do that… You take them in the evening, right? We can head to bed when you start to feel tired… that’s no problem…”

The older nodded again, avoiding Seungmin’s gaze once more by looking down. He didn’t want to tell him, didn’t want to worry him even more. But he knew he had no other choice.

“What else, Woojin…? You still haven’t told me everything, right…?”, the younger brother asked, looking right through Woojin’s hesitation.

“Seungmin… I… I nearly drowned yesterday…”

Shock was written all over Seungmin’s face, obviously not having expected this revelation. Tears were filing his eyes. His bad feelings hadn’t deceived him. He shouldn’t have left him alone.

“What-... but-...”, he started before his voice broke, tears starting to fall down his cheeks.

“I’m sorry… I didn’t know how to tell you… I… wanted to take a bath and took one pill as I was instructed to because I was afraid of forgetting it later… I couldn’t move… I was so tired and… Chan and Minho found me just in time… I don’t want to worry you even more… I’m so sorry, Minnie… I didn’t know this was going to happen… It was an accident…”

When Seungmin stood up and walked over to him, Woojin quickly put his arms around his younger brother, holding him close, whispering apologies.

“I’m so sorry, Minnie… I’m so sorry… I didn’t want to bring back memories-... I’m never going to leave you alone… never…”, he whispered, rocking him back and forth, gently trying to soothe his crying and to calm him down. 

“Please-... please never.. hide anything from me again-... I-.. I can’t lose you, too-...”, Seungmin eventually managed to say, his voice hoarse from crying. “You don’t have to fight alone anymore-... I’m here-... and.. and I will help you as much as you helped me-... you’re all I have left-...”

Carefully, Woojin pressed him closer, trying to hold back his own tears.

“I promise-...”

They both knew that it wouldn’t be easier from now on, that Woojin would still fall back into the same pattern of hiding something and that he would seclude himself when things got hard. But Seungmin was glad that he now knew how to react, what he had to pay attention to and how he could help his brother.

It wasn’t going to be easy in the next few days, not since the trial was merely one week away and they had to face their parents and their past again. But their biggest hurdle would be cleared soon. And then nothing could be standing in their way of recovery. Nothing and no one could hinder them from getting better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Minho is the real MVP.  
> I wanted Woojin to work with/for him since I've started writing this fanfic tbh.
> 
> I hope you liked the chapter! Let me know what you thought ♥  
> I slowly feel like liking my writing again! I took a small social media break over the weekend and finished writing Idol and finally have an idea how to continue this story. Though I will most definitely still update irregularly. Work is demanding since it's summer and everyone is going on holiday ugh.
> 
> Though I'll be on vacation too at the end of the month because I get too see Stray Kids in London and Berlin ㅠㅠ I'm so excited and happy and I still can't believe that we got tickets ㅠㅠ asdfghjkl 
> 
> Anyways thank you so much for reading! ANd if you wanna read something with a bit of drama but kinda more light-hearted give Idol a try ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 12:  
> \- mentions of abuse  
> \- mention of suicide

The closer the day of the trial came, the more nervous Woojin and Seungmin got. More than one glass broke on the kitchen floor when one of them got startled, and most of their nights were spent sleeplessly turning from one side to the other. In the end, both brothers found themselves in the apartment next door, all six of them cuddled close to each other on the spacious couch, in the same position as the week before. 

Woojin was lying on his back, staring at the ceiling while listening to the soft snores around him. No matter how hard he tried he couldn’t fall asleep, the thought of the trial, of standing face to face with their parents again, kept him awake, kept his mind running with every possible outcome there was.

What if they walked free? If they were found not guilty? 

What if they got custody of Seungmin again? How would he be able to protect him? He wouldn’t leave him alone, he’d rather go back with him than leave him alone with his parents

He was only pulled out of his train of thought when he felt an arm reaching around his waist, pulling him closer.

“I can hear you thinking… you should try to sleep, Woojinnie…”, Chan mumbled, eyes still closed, and seemingly more asleep than awake.

“I’m trying… I’m tired... but I just can’t fall asleep…”, he replied silently, still wondering about the pet name Chan had never used before.

“I know you’re worried… but what could go wrong…?”

“Everything…? What if they are not found guilty…? So much could go wrong, Chan…”

Chan sighed and pulled him closer again, gently forcing Woojin to lie on his side. The older gave in quickly and leant his forehead against his chest.

“Woojin… they have enough proof for this not to happen… neither of you will ever have to go back there and they most certainly won’t walk free again…”

Woojin stayed quiet, just listening to him. “Try to sleep… tomorrow will be exhausting and you’ll need all your strength… And whatever the outcome is, even though I’m sure it will be in your favour, we won’t leave you alone. We’ll stay with you and we’ll help you through this…”

“Thank you, Chan… I don’t know what we’d be doing without you… we never would have made it this far…”

“No need to thank me… we’re glad we can help… now try to get some sleep, okay…?”, Chan replied gently, placing a soft kiss onto Woojin’s hair.

Woojin felt the heat creep up his cheeks and was glad that it was too dark for Chan to see him blushing furiously. Chan had never kissed him before. He had been affectionate, yes, but he had never showed it to him like this. 

It made Woojin’s stomach flutter and his mind race again. He knew he liked Chan but he had never allowed himself to think more of it, to think about how safe and comfortable he felt with him, how much he liked being in his presence, how he managed to make him laugh and forget about his miserable situation, how he was slowly and steadily falling in love with Chan.

He was aware of all these little things, but every time he had forbidden his thoughts to continue. Chan would never like him back. How could he like someone like him? He was far too broken to deserve this kind of love from someone like him.

Closing his eyes he pushed these thoughts away. Chan was right, he needed to sleep, tomorrow would be hard. Breathing in the younger’s musky scent he felt himself slowly drifting off to sleep, his last conscious thought being that he wanted to stay like this forever, wanting to pretend to feel loved by Chan like this, at least tonight.

The next morning came far too quickly. Woojin felt like he hadn’t slept at all even though he knew he had at least for a few hours. When he finally opened his eyes he saw that he and Seungmin were the last to get up, everyone else already tiptoeing around them.

“Ah… you’re awake… I just wanted to wake you both up…” Minho was smiling at him, while he carefully woke up the youngest, brushing gently through his hair.

“Channie made breakfast…”

“I’m not really hungry, to be honest….”, Woojin replied, already feeling nauseous. He was sure he wouldn’t be able to stomach anything.

“Then at least drink some tea… maybe your appetite will come back… how about you, Minnie…?”

Seungmin shook his head, not feeling any different than his brother.

Minho sighed. “Okay… then also only tea for you… I’ll let Chan know. Don’t take too long, okay?”, he said before leaving them alone again, walking back into the kitchen and closing the door behind him. 

Woojin looked at Seungmin and smiled sadly. He looked as miserable as he felt.

“Today’s the day, hm...?”, he whispered, pulling his younger brother into his arms, hugging him gently.

“I’m so afraid, hyung…”

“Me too… but we can make it… We’ve been through so much already… We can survive this, too… and it will be the last time that we’ll ever have to see them…”

Woojin tried to believe what he was saying. He still doubted his own words, but he needed to be strong for Seungmin, needed to comfort him and let him know that everything would to be okay.

“I hope so… I really hope so…”

They stayed like this for another few minutes, needing each others’ presence, needing to know they had each other and would make it through the day. It would be far from easy, but after today they would finally be able to close this chapter of their life. 

At least, Woojin hoped so.

“Good morning…”, Chan greeted them with a soft smile when they finally joined the others in the kitchen. “I know you’re both not hungry, but please drink some tea and try to eat a bit of buttered toast. You’ll need all your strength today…”

They did, even if more to please Chan than for themselves. But as Woojin had thought, he couldn’t stomach it and found himself in the bathroom, bending over the toilet and retching while Seungmin gently brushed over his back. At least one of them was able to keep it in.

“Better…?”, the younger asked him softly when his coughing finally had stopped. 

Woojin nodded weakly. 

“Yeah… it’s okay… don’t worry…”

“Okay… Minho’s brewing some chamomile tea for you… we should get ready in the meantime…”

Half an hour later Woojin got into the taxi Changbin had called for all of them, a tumbler full of chamomile tea in his hand. Carefully he sipped at the hot beverage, trying not to spill anything on the clothes he had gotten from Chan for the day. 

He had been a bit embarrassed about it. He had never needed a suit and thought his jeans and white shirt would do for today, both items being the least run down he owned. Minho and Chan both had insisted that it wasn’t enough, that he needed to look at least a bit more well-dressed to appear in court, before they had gone through Chan’s wardrobe and found him a light brown pair of slacks and a black suit jacket that he could wear with his shirt that fit him. In the end, they had been right. His appearance was much better, more mature and professional like this. 

And still he felt like a child when he sat down next to their lawyer with Seungmin, when the doors closed and their parents were walked in, seated directly opposite of them. He felt their hateful stares on him but he didn’t dare to look up, he couldn’t, fear already reigning over his body. He froze, and at the same time he wanted to run. 

A touch on his hand brought Woojin back out of his paralysis. He looked at Seungmin, who had taken his trembling hand, squeezing it gently.

“We got this, hyung. It will be over soon.”, he whispered, a determined look now on his face. 

Woojin nodded. “Yeah... we got this.”, he answered, closing his eyes for a second and taking a deep breath. 

When he opened them again he looked straight into his parents’ eyes, not backing down again. He wouldn’t allow them to have such a power over him anymore, wouldn’t allow them to make him feel threatened and worthless. This time he would be stronger than them, for himself and for Seungmin.

However, he was glad when the first break was eventually announced by the judge, giving him an opportunity to breathe and distance himself from them again for a few minutes. 

“How are you holding up?”, Chan asked them, handing both of them some pretzel sticks he had bought from a vending machine. 

“It’s okay… but the break was long overdue at this point…”, Seungmin answered for both of them, Woojin just nodding along. He definitely needed that break.

Woojin had been the first to be called to the witness stand. Retelling everything again for what felt like the millionth time in the past weeks hurt, it still hurt and probably would hurt forever. But on the other hand he felt lighter, the heavy burden he had carried around finally being lifted from his shoulders.

It wasn’t until Seungmin took his place in the stand afterwards that he eventually realised that his younger brother had witnessed and suffered a lot more from the abuse than he had ever thought. He had tried to shield him from as much as possible, and before him their older brother had tried to do the same. But it hadn’t been enough. And it hurt Woojin’s heart to know that he hadn’t been able to keep Seungmin as safe as he had believed. 

Their parents had to be silenced more than once during both their testimonies, and it was hard for them to not fall back into their old habits and fall silent again, especially for Woojin. He had never heard his voice break so much. 

Their parents’ behaviour only got worse when their old CPS worker was called to the stand, talking about the various times the family had been visited but deemed as okay to keep the children, that they might be troubled but that there had been worse cases, and that to this day Seokjin’s death was a casualty that didn’t have to be directly related to the abuse. 

At this point both Kim brothers had not just felt sadness, but anger rise inside of them. They had always disliked their previous CPS worker, but seeing his incompetence now was the final straw. They both knew that if someone had intervened earlier their brother would still be alive, Woojin would have been able to continue school and none of them would have had to go through their experienced trauma. 

It’s what Yang-sshi had told the judge and everyone present. That when she worked through the case file she thought that a lot of the traumatising experiences could have been avoided, that Woojin and Seungmin were lucky that they had made it out alive, because from what she had seen the abuse had been frequent, multiple times a day, and had gotten more horrific over the years, which in the end had been verified by the doctors and therapists that had treated them. 

Woojin sighed sadly over what Seokjin’s old therapist had revealed.

“No matter the outcome… I’ll never forget their face and how they shut up when the therapist showed Jin’s suicide note…”, Seungmin mumbled, leaning more onto his older brother. “The disbelief that it even exists and that no one knew about it…”

“Me too, Minnie…” 

Woojin was sure that the note could be the case breaker for them, though. There was enough evidence for the abuse in it alone. He smiled a bit. 

“It’s such a typical thing for him to do something like that… hiding a second lettter from everyone until it is needed…”

Seokjin had left them a note all those years ago, apologising that he couldn’t do it anymore, couldn’t stand the abuse anymore, that he was sorry that it had to end like this, but that he hoped it would get better for them one day; that they could make it and leave everything behind, and that they should always look out for a yellow butterfly if they missed him too much.

It was and had always been one of Woojin’s earliest and fondest memories. All three of them sitting in a small green space at school, watching some yellow butterflies nearby looking for flowers and nectar.

Seungmin smiled a sad smile. “Yeah… as if he knew we wouldn’t be able to keep the other one. He knew they would take it away and destroy it…”

Half an hour later everyone was called into the room to continue with the second part of the hearing.

Some of their teachers were called to the stand, talking about the things they had noticed on their pupils, bruises and careful behaviour that they had reported and that apparently no authority had taken seriously. Woojin was shocked about so much incompetence and ignorance. And instantly felt bad because he knew: there had to be more children like them out there. More children that were failed by CPS, that had no one that listened to them and took them seriously.

Jimin was the last to take the stand. And among everyone who had already testified she was the one that knew him best, that had been around him nearly every day for the past few years, and in the end she would be the one the one that moved everyone to tears with her words.

When the hearing had ended and everyone was waiting for the verdict outside, Woojin hugged her tightly, tears still stinging in his eyes.

“It’s so good to see you both again…”, Jimin whispered into the crook of his neck. “I’m so sorry that I never saw anything of it and… that I never intervened when I suspected something… I’m so sorry, Woojin…”

“It’s okay, noona…It’s over now and we can finally recover… that’s all that matters…”

“Yes…”, Jimin smiled a bit, “both of you already look a bit healthier and better… and you’ve put on some weight, Woojin…”

“Yeah… it’s getting better and… we’re getting a lot of help…”, he answered, looking over to Chan and the others, happy to see that Seungmin’s school friends were there, to support them, too.

“I hope you can be happy from now on… you, of all the people, deserve it… both of you…”

He sat down on a bench with her, updating her on his life so far, that he had found a new job at Minho’s coffee shop and would work there as soon as it had it’s opening. Jimin still felt guilty about selling the bakery because everyone had lost their job, but Woojin reassured her that it wasn’t her fault, that she couldn’t have known that Dohyun would do this and deceive her, lie to her. She shouldn’t blame herself for it. 

An hour later they were called back into the court room again. The judge and jury had finally come to a verdict. Woojin and Seungmin broke down crying when they heard it.

 _Jail_.

Woojin couldn’t remember for how long they were going to be imprisoned. But he didn't care at that moment. All that mattered was that it was happening. That they wouldn’t walk free anymore, that they wouldn’t get custody of Seungmin again, that they never had to see them again, that it was over. Finally over.

He was still crying tears of relief and joy when they left the courtroom and when their friends puppy piled them into a big group hug. Clinging to Chan, he couldn’t believe it. He had never thought he would see this day, would see his parents get what they deserve. 

“It’s over… it’s finally over… I’m so happy for you… you made it!”, Chan whispered, holding him close in his embrace.

“Finally… I… I never thought this day would come…”

Chan wanted to reply something when he looked up, barely catching Seungmin kissing Changbin in his euphoria. Who would’ve thought that the youngest would be the one doing the first move. 

He chuckled slightly and pointed Woojin’s attention in their direction, smiling gently when he saw that he was as surprised as him, but his tears stopped and a fond and happy smile spread over his face.

The kiss only lasted a few seconds, both Seungmin and Changbin blushing a deep red when they realised what had just happened and that everyone was watching them. It was cute, and Woojin really hoped it wouldn’t be just a slip. He wanted his brother to be truly happy from now on.

“So… Do you want to go home or shall we go out, have dinner and celebrate?”, Jisung finally broke the more or less awkward silence, grinning from ear to ear. Seungmin was still blushing furiously but let Changbin take his hand, holding him close.

“Dinner sounds good, but… we need to go somewhere first…”, Woojin said, smiling at Seungmin. 

They had to make good on a promise they had made each other, and after so many years it was high time they’d go and visit him.

Even though their parents had always forbidden them from coming back after the funeral, Woojin still found his way around the graveyard, finding Seokjin’s grave like he had been here only yesterday. Tears formed in his eyes when he saw the simple grave, expecting it to have overgrown flowers and weed, to look wild and dirty, unloved, and forgotten.

But exactly the opposite was the case. 

Someone had to be here regularly to tend to the grave, to care for it. To care for their brother. Woojin looked at the blooming forget-me-nots and smiled, tears already streaming down his face. He kneeled down in front of the memorial plate and put down the peace lilies they had bought on their way, carefully brushing over the stone that was warm to the touch from the sunlight shining down on them.

“We made it, Jinnie-... we survived-... and they’re going to jail-...”, he said, voice barely louder than a whisper.

“I’m so sorry that we never came to visit you.. but they never let us-... but I’m happy to see that someone cared for you and cared for your grave for us… I wish you could see this, Jinnie-...”

He put his arm around Seungmin who was sobbing at/ his shoulder.

“Thank you for everything you’ve done for us… that you protected us for so long-... We miss you so much, Seokjin-...”

His view got clouded with tears and he had to bury his face in his hands. 

There were no words to explain how much he missed him, how often he had thought about coming here, how much he missed his comfort and voice when he sang for them to calm down after an especially hard day. Simply, how much he missed his older brother, the only person that had always loved them unconditionally.

“Hyung-...look-...”, he heard Seungmin whisper next to him. 

He looked up again and instantly started sobbing uncontrollably when he saw it.

A single yellow butterfly was calmly sitting on the peace lilies, seemingly watching them for a moment before flying towards and around them. 

In that moment Woojin knew, that Seokjin would always be with them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof, probably one of the most important chapters in this whole Fanfic.
> 
> I'm sorry it took me so long to update but well RL and everytime I tried to proofread I made myself cry. So a big thank you to [ my wonderful girlfriend](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NogitsuneStiles/pseuds/momjoon) who beta read it for me ㅠㅠ
> 
> Anyways, I hope you liked the chapter!
> 
> The next update may take a bit again because I'll start my vacation at the end of the week which means Stray Kids Unveil in London and Berlin and visiting my family. I hope I can write in between though!  
> (asdfghjkl I'm not ready for the concerts eye-)
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 13:  
> /

It was late when they finally got home, staying in the big apartment with everyone until one by one slowly retreated, Seungmin following Changbin into his room to talk about everything, about them and their feelings for each other.

Woojin on the other hand was still sitting on the big balcony, head lying on Chan’s shoulder, the younger’s arm loosely draped around him, and a mug of hot and steaming tea in his hands.

“How are you feeling…?”, Chan eventually asked after a while of them just sitting in comfortable silence next to each other.

“Relieved… and happy… it’s finally over… I’d never thought I’d make it to see this day…”

“But you did… I’m sure your older brother is proud of you… proud of both of you… you made it…”

Woojin smiled a bit, looking at the scenery in front of him, the night lights of Seoul reaching as far as the eye can see, the traffic below them barely audible anymore.

“I hope so… you know… sometimes I thought it would be so much easier to just end it… follow Jin… but I knew what had happened after he died… when they started to turn on me instead… I couldn’t do that to Seungmin… I couldn’t just leave him…”

His smile grew a bit when he felt a shy kiss on top of his head, and he allowed himself to enjoy this moment as far as he could.

“But that’s over now… we’re getting help and we’re getting better… I know it will still take time but… the first steps are done…”

“They are… You both did so well… and now you can finally be happy...”, Chan whispered his reply, nose still buried in Woojin’s hair and holding him close.

Woojin chuckled. “Yeah… Seungmin’s already miles ahead of me… but I’m glad he’s got Changbin… he was talking so much about him it was only a matter of time… but I’m happy for him, both them…”

“Me too… I haven’t seen Changbin this happy in a while… he’s really fallen for Minnie…”

“And Minnie for him…”

Woojin smiled a bit more, glad that Seungmin had found love in this hard time, that he wouldn’t make the same experience as he did when he finally decided to open up to someone. Deep inside he was still afraid that something could happen even though he knew better, but above all he was just happy for him, wanted him to be happy with someone he loved and who loved him. 

Which he told his younger brother a few days later when they were alone in their apartment, talking about the relationship after Seungmin told him that he and Changbin were together now. 

And still he couldn’t drown out the tiny voice of jealousy in his head, not when he saw how happy Seungmin was with Changbin and not when he told him that he would find someone too.

Woojin felt the dynamics shift, Seungmin staying over more often, often spending the night next doors. At first he was glad for some space, that he was able to focus on himself to get better before he started his new job soon.

But then the nightmares began. 

He grew restless, not wanting to sleep when he was alone and spent his time baking and taking photos of his creations for the coffee shop’s Instagram page. He knew Seungmin had noticed the bags under his eyes, but he had brushed it off, not wanting to bother him too much and putting a shadow on his newly found happiness, promising to get more sleep again.

It worked for a few nights when Seungmin stayed with him, the nightmares stopped only to start over when he was alone once again.

Seungmin sighed when he saw the green dot next to Woojin's name on screen, seeing that he was still up in the middle of the night.

"Why the sad face, Minnie?", Chan asked when he sat down next to him, a glass of water in his hand. Seungmin hadn't heard him being in the kitchen.

"I can't sleep…"

"Yeah I figured. Otherwise you wouldn't be sitting in the dark living room at ass o'clock… what's keeping you up…?"

Seungmin leaned onto Chan, letting him comfort him by brushing through his hair lovingly.

"Woojin… I worry about him…"

Chan smiled sympathetically. "Because he's still awake too?"

"Yeah… he has nightmares. He thinks I don't know and… I don't know why he's keeping it from me again but he talked in his sleep… well mumbled… I couldn't understand him completely… but I'm worried…", Seungmin sighed, not knowing how he should put it correctly. He knew that Woojin wasn't telling him because he didn't want him to worry, like he always did. And like always it did exactly the opposite to Seungmin, worried him even more.

"I thought it would get better now…", the younger continued, "but it seems like it only gets better for me… he's still on the stronger meds he got and even though they make him tired he can't sleep… and when he does sleep he has nightmares…"

Chan listened to him, still brushing through his hair lovingly.

"Do you have any idea why he might be stuck? I mean… he's still going to your therapist twice a week right?"

"He does… but I'm not sure if he tells her everything… he's not telling me so why tell her…?"

"Do you really think he keeps things from her?"

Seungmin shrugged. "I'm not sure but at this point it wouldn't surprise me… I thought about going with him next time… or talk to her in private about him… but I'm afraid it makes things worse…"

Chan nodded, thinking about ways to help. "I'm sure he'll get better again, Seungmin. He just needs longer and… everything is changing at the moment… the trial is over and he doesn't have to fear about losing custody of you anymore. You got your first boyfriend and you're staying here more often… it's the first time in his life that he's alone and the first time he doesn't have to protect you anymore…"

"You think it's my fault…?"

The older chuckled softly, placing a soft kiss to his hair.

"No, not at all. But think about it, Seungmin. His only goal in the last few years was to get you out of there and to protect you. And he did so by working a lot and staying with you nearly every hour of the day. And that's not needed anymore."

Seungmin nodded, realisation dawning upon him.

"And the coffee shop doesn't open until next week… he needs something to do…"

"You can put it like that, yes… I think it might get better as soon as he can work again but we all have to accept that he has a longer road to recovery than you have and maybe it's not that bad of an idea if you go with him to one of the sessions. Just talk to him about it first."

The younger nodded again and smiled a bit. "I will… thank you Chan…", he said, hugging the artist tight. "I'm so glad we got you… all four of you…"

"Don't mention it… and now you should go to bed… it's late…"

Chan watched Seungmin walk back to Changbin's bedroom, waving at him before he stepped inside. He on the other hand stayed on the couch, debating what he should do. Go to bed or text Woojin?

In the end he decided to do the latter when he saw the green dot still on.

 **[Chan]:** You’re still awake? Is everything alright?

 **[Woojin]:** I’m fine. Don’t worry. I just can't fall asleep.

Chan was surprised that Woojin answered so quickly but at the same time was relieved and even more worried.

 **[Chan]:** nightmares?

Woojin stared at his phone. He knew Chan was attentive when it came to him but he could possibly not know about him having nightmares.

 **[Chan]:** Do you want me to come over?

Did he? Could he bother him with his problems? Again?

However, Chan didn't leave him much room to decide. Before he could answer, it knocked on the door and Woojin sighed. He got up from his spot on the couch and opened the door for Chan who was smiling softly.

"What would you have done if I wanted to be alone?", Woojin asked after closing the door.

"I would've gone back and let you be. Doesn't look like you want to be alone, though.", Chan answered, sniffing the air. "Are you baking?"

"Yes… just some bread, it calms me down."

"From the nightmares?", the younger asked, gently pulling the baker into his arms and holding him.

"How do you know about that…?" Woojin was sure he already knew the answer to that, his heart clenching slightly, knowing that he had let Seungmin down again by not telling him.

"You’re up even though your meds make you tired… and I’ve been talking to Seungmin... He's worried about you…"

"Of course he is…", Woojin sighed. He didn't know how often he had heard that sentence in the last few months. Far too often probably.

"I don't want him to be worried… that's why I haven't told him… I don't want to put a damper on the beginning of his relationship…", he continued, closing his eyes for a second.

"I'm sure he appreciates that… but you know him. Of course he's worried…", Chan replied, lovingly brushing through Woojin's hair just like he did a few minutes earlier to Seungmin.

"And I can understand if you don't want to tell him or talk to him about it… but you can always come to me Woojin… always… I'm here to help. That hasn't stopped with the trial…"

“I know… it’s just not that easy… I don’t want to bother you with my problems all the time…”

“You’re not bothering me, believe me. It’s bothering me more if I don’t know what’s going on and you’re distancing yourself again…”

Woojin nodded. He knew that. He knew that what he was doing wasn’t right, but it was easier. There were so many things going on with him, the therapy, his newly appeared insomnia, his jealousy. He didn’t know how to talk about it, what to say that didn’t sound pathetic and whiny.

He sighed.

“Listen, Woojin… I don’t have a solution for all of your problems… but whenever I can’t fall asleep I go to the gym. It’s on the highest floor of this building and open around the clock. Come with me.”

“The gym…?”, Woojin thought about it for a moment and wasn’t able to suppress a soft chuckle. “I’m not exactly the sporty type.. and isn’t that what I’m doing when I bake?”

“But baking doesn’t make you tired, right? And it doesn’t matter if you’re sporty or not. I can help you with that.” Chan smiled at him.

“I don’t know…”

“You don’t have to decide now, Woojinnie. Right now I’m too tired anyways, but think about it okay?”

Woojin was still not used to the new pet name Chan was using, but he was lying if he said he didn’t like it.

“I will… thank you Channie…”

“Good… and now we’re waiting for you bread to finish baking and then head to bed okay?”

As hesitant as Woojin was at first he was glad that Chan was staying with him as soon as they went to bed. He felt comfortable and warm having the younger this close, having his arms wrapped around him and holding him while rubbing soft circles into his back.

He felt safe again. A safeness he has never felt with anyone else, not Seokjin and not Seungmin. Something he only felt when he was close to Chan. And he knew it was partially love, he had finally accepted that Chan owned his heart now, that he didn’t want to be happy and in love with anyone else but him. But he still didn’t dare to act on it, was still too afraid to get rejected or worse. His memories with Dohyun were still too prominent in his mind. 

“Good night, Woojinnie…”, Chan mumbled into his hair, placing another soft kiss to it, “Wake me if something is wrong okay…?”

Woojin nodded. He could get used to this kisses and soft pecks. Actually, he wanted to get used to it, wanted to have it only for himself.

“Good night, Channie…”, he whispered, moving slightly to get more comfortable in Chan’s embrace. Yes, this was what he wanted to get used to, what he wanted to have in the future and for the rest of his life.

And he knew to have it, he had to get better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that it has taken so long and no that I've finally updated it's a filler chapter...  
> I can't seem to like my writing at the moment and it takes me a lot to start. I think you can even see it in the chapter and I might rewrite the beginning of it at some point in the future.
> 
> I still hope you kinda liked it!  
> Thank you so much for reading and for staying with me! ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 14:  
> \- slight homophobia  
> \- bullying and harrassment

What Woojin didn’t expect, though, was that he found himself in the gym with Chan not even two days later. The younger had seen him being online again late at night and within seconds Woojin had thrown on an old pair of sweatpants and a tshirt and was following Chan to the elevators.

The gym was located on the highest floor of the building, being equipped with everything you needed. Cross trainers, treadmills and various sport equipments with weights Woojin wasn’t sure how to use.

"Wanna start slow?", Chan asked him with a smile on his face, seeing how unsure the older was about his surroundings. Woojin nodded. 

"We can only do some cardio if you want to. No weights, just some running on the treadmills.", the younger suggested, already leading him to said training tool.

Woojin listened closely as he explained the settings to him, trying to remember them in case he ever got here alone.

And then he started running. Running until he felt his legs hurt and his body begging him to stop. He knew he had stamina, had to have it because of his job, but this was new and different. And still he managed to run for far longer than he expected.

It became a ritual throughout the week leading to the coffee shop’s grand opening with him and Chan going to the gym and it didn’t take long for Woojin to actually sleep better and feel more balanced. Something he hadn’t felt lately. 

“Everything okay?”, Chan asked him when he came back from the shower and lied down next to him in bed. It had become a thing with them too. Chan sleeping over nearly every day now to make sure he wasn’t staying awake the whole time. Which apparently had also helped his insomnia from what Jisung had told him. 

It made Woojin happy, having Chan over as company made him feel less lonely when his mind started acting up and producing scenarios in his head, made him calm down when he got too antsy and anxious about his surroundings, especially in moments when he thought having company was too much. He didn’t know how Chan did it but he always managed to make him feel better, make him feel loved and valued.

“Yes… just tired now. And nervous…”, he answered facing the younger.

“Because of tomorrow?”

Woojin nodded. Minho’s coffee shop was finally going to open and he could go back to work. They had already prepared some pastries that he’d finish baking tomorrow before they’d open but he was still afraid to fuck up, afraid that something wouldn’t work out.

“Don’t be nervous… you’ve prepared so much already and we’ll be by your side tomorrow… You’re not alone Woojin…”

“I know… I’ll try not to be nervous but it’s not easy… I mean I know that nothing is going to happen and that I’m not alone… I’m just not used that it gets better… because every time it did something happened again…”

Chan smiled slightly. He didn’t know everything about their past but he knew enough to understand what Woojin meant. Who he meant.

“Don’t worry… Your parents are in jail and your daily dose of meds also has gotten reduced… and don’t worry about that dick of an ex-friend. He should know by now that you’re not alone and that if he comes at you he will also have to deal with us…”, he reassured the baker while pulling him into his arms.

Woojin closed his eyes and nodded. “I hope so… I know he doesn’t shy away from anything, though… I just… I just hope it bores him enough to stop…”

He really did. He hadn’t seen Dohyun around for a few weeks now and hadn’t heard anything of him. Maybe he really had gotten bored of it, bored of harassing him and was ignoring him again like he used to in the past. He didn’t know yet how wrong he was.

“Try to sleep, Woojinnie… we have to get up early tomorrow for the big day…”, Chan whispered softly into his hair before placing a soft kiss to it like he did every night they shared a bed. 

Woojin snuggled closer, breathing in the heavy scent of Chan’s shower gel. He’d never thought this fresh but musky scent would calm him down this much.

“Good night, Chan…”, he answered, already drifting off to sleep from the comfort around him and his worn-out and sore body.

Like the nights before he slept through it until his alarm clock went off in the morning. Groaning slightly he unwrapped himself from the younger’s limbs around him and got up, letting him sleep a bit longer. But when he stepped out of the bathroom again the younger was already up and making coffee and tea for them.

“Good morning! How did you sleep?”, Chan asked handing him a cup.

“Good. I didn’t have nightmares and didn’t wake up until the alarm went off. What about you?”

“Me too. I think I haven’t slept as well as I did in the last few weeks.”

Woojin could’ve sworn that Chan was blushing before excusing himself to head to the bathroom. He didn’t have a lot of time to think about it, though, when he heard the front door being opened.

“Hyung? Are you up already?”, his younger brother asked into the otherwise quiet apartment.

“Yes, come on in, Minnie!”, he answered him, preparing another cup of tea, handing it to him as soon as he joined him in the kitchen.

“Good morning…”, Seungmin said, smiling brightly and hugging his brother. “Minho is up already, too, and when Jisung is done in the bathroom we can head out to the shop to make the last preparations for the opening."

"Okay. Chan should be done any minute now so we're ready, too.", the older brother answered. 

He was still nervous and he knew it wouldn't go away until later. But unlike last night it was a good kind of nervous. He couldn't wait to start working again, being surrounded by the calm of his kitchen around him, doing what he loved. 

As soon as all of them were done they headed out to the coffee shop. They still had about two hours before the grand opening and were mostly done with everything except for some small things. While everyone was tending to these in the front Woojin stayed in the back with Seungmin, finishing his pastries and cupcakes that would be handed out later for free.

"It's great to see you back at work, hyung… I always loved watching you bake but it's still different when you do it in a more professional surrounding…", Seungmin said, helping his brother as much as he could.

"Thank you, Minnie… it feels good to be back in an actual bakery. Baking at home isn't the same.", Woojin answered brushing off some powdered sugar on his mint coloured apron, "I'm sure it will keep me busy and focused again."

"And then it goes up for you again, too. We're both on the same road to recovery now."

Seungmin proved to be right. 

Having back a normal daily schedule helped Woojin a lot in the upcoming weeks. He finally had a reason to get up in the morning again and with Chan staying over more and more in the smaller apartment he also had a reason to get back home as soon as his shift was over. 

He enjoyed working in the coffee shop. It was different from the bakery and he helped a lot more in the front, cleaning tables and taking the customers’ orders, even making the coffee for them after Minho had shown him how to prepare the different variations on their menu.

In a quiet moment he looked around the coffee shop from behind the counter, smiling happily seeing the few customers sitting at their tables, enjoying their coffees and snacks. At this time of the day it was usually quiet, quiet enough that Woojin could manage the front on his own while Minho was doing the paperwork in his office. It was his favourite time of the day.

Though, his smile faltered instantly after the bell announced a new customer coming in, realizing who just entered the coffee shop. Woojin felt the urge to run and hide.

"Woojinnie! Well, I haven't seen _you_ in a while!", Dohyun greeted him with a big grin on his face while he stepped up to the counter, his friends - Woojin's old friends - directly behind him. "What's with the long face? Is that a way to greet your customers? Your old friends?"

Taking a deep breath Woojin stepped up to the register, trying to ignore Dohyun's and his friends’ comments about him working here and him not greeting them with a smile.

"What can I get you?", he asked them, surprised about the steadiness he was able to keep in his voice while taking their orders and handing back the change.

"Keep the change. I don't want money that has been touched by someone like you!", one of the girls - Hyein - said, pushing back the coins over the counter. Woojin tried to keep his hands from shaking too much when he picked them up again.

"Please sit down, your order will be ready and I'll bring it to you.", he said before turning around, seeing Minho who was watching him worriedly. He must have seen the exchange.

"Did anything happen with them? Is everything alright, Woojin…?", the younger asked barely louder than a whisper, making Woojin realise that he'd never seen Dohyun before.

"It's… that’s Dohyun… with my old friends-... it's okay-…", he answered, voice now shaking.

Minho looked at him in shock before turning to look at Dohyun and his friends again.

“Shit… Let me handle this… I’m so sorry, Woojin…”, he said, taking the tray with the cake and pastries from him. “Prepare the coffee, I’ll bring this to them…”

“Thank you…”

Woojin watched him carry the tray over to the group of friends. He felt sick to his stomach when he saw how overly friendly and polite they were to Minho while harassing him not even five minutes ago. He was praying to every deity that this would be their last visit here.

Placing the last cup of coffee onto another tray he looked for Minho again, wanting to signal to him that he could bring them their drinks. The younger was smiling uncomfortably at him, being drawn into a conversation with one of the older ladies that visited the coffee shop nearly every day. Woojin sighed. He knew this could take ages and he didn’t want the coffee to get cold otherwise he knew Dohyun would complain to him about it. He picked up the tray and walked over to the table, ready to place down the orders. 

What he didn’t expect was that Dohyun would _accidentally_ knock over the tray.

Woojin jumped back when he felt the hot liquid pouring over him, crying out in pain as it burned his skin before his body went into full shock. Glasses and mugs were shattering around him, spreading shards and coffee everywhere. His ears were ringing and he wanted to run but at the same time his body wouldn’t move over the stares from everyone in the coffee shop. He barely even registered how furious Minho was.

“Out!! All of you!! Now!!”, he shouted at Dohyun and the others, angrily pointing at the door.

“You’re throwing us out? Because Woojinnie can’t carry a tray?” 

Woojin couldn’t believe that Dohyun still had the nerve to talk back to Minho.

“Listen here you piece of shit of a human. Do you really think I would not watch you after everything you’ve done to him? I saw you tipping over the fucking tray. And I swear to god if you’re not out within the next five seconds you will regret every single decision you’ve ever made in your miserable and sad life. And don’t you dare to ever come back and set a foot in here again. Neither of you!”

Woojin stepped back when they all got up, seemingly being afraid of Minho’s sudden calmness and ice cold voice. He’d probably run too if he was on the receiving end. 

Dohyun turned around at the door again and Woojin felt shivers of a fear run down his back when he saw the look in his eyes.

“You’re going to regret this, Woojin. Mark my words.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't think I would update this soon after the news. But somehow writing helps me dealing with everything even though I still miss Woojin every single day and can't wait for him to come back or give us another sign.
> 
> I deleted the Update Chapter about his departure but I just want to say it again:  
> I'll continue this fanfic and I'm trying to update as fast as possible though I still have my down times where even reading his name will make me tear up and sad. The last two weeks have been hard and I'm sure it will take a while for me to heal completely but it's fine and everyone has their own pace. Woojin will always be my ult bias, whether he's with Stray Kids or not. And I will always support him and the boys, no matter what comes. Eight in the group but nine in the family, right?
> 
> Thank you so much for waiting for me and reading this fanfic. It still means a lot to me. And big thank you to everyone for giving this kudos, bookmarks and comments. They are highly appreciated and believe it or not but I do recognize some usernames by now! :) ♥
> 
> Also thank you again for all the kind words on the Update chapter. Please know that my DMs are always open if you want to talk!
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW:  
> \- relapse  
> \- anxiety

Woojin filed a complaint against Dohyun the next day after everyone urged him to. For harassing him and burning his skin. 

He had been lucky, though. The doctor said it wasn't too bad and that he'd had lady luck on his side. Some ointment would do and it wouldn't leave any more prominent scars.

Chan helped him applying the calming balm onto his skin.

"Is that okay? Does it hurt?", the younger asked, careful not to accidentally hurt him even more.

"It's okay… don't worry…"

"Do you have to go to work tomorrow? We should talk to Minho to get you a few days off."

Woojin chuckled. It was cute how worried Chan was about him.

"Don't worry. Minho called in another barista to take over my shifts for the rest of the week so my burns can heal."

"That's good… let me know if you need anything okay? I can get new balm from the pharmacy if we run out and I'm sure I could also reschedule some appointments if you need me here.", Chan said smiling, looking up at him.

"Thank you, Channie… but you don't have to. I think I can manage. And Seungmin will be here too… I don't want to be a burden…"

"You're not a burden. Please don't think that."

Woojin smiled at him. He knew he wasn't a burden. But sometimes his mind kept telling him he was. 

In the end he was glad that Chan stayed home as much as he could and helped him throughout the next days. It made them easier and he was able to rest as much as possible thanks to the tattoo artist. 

However, it didn't prepare him for the attorney letter he got about his complaint a week after the assault.

"What does it say…?", Seungmin asked, already sure it wasn’t the news they hoped for by the look on Woojin's face.

"They won't follow the complaint any further... it's my word against his and apparently it doesn't count that Minho saw everything… it might still have been an accident…", Woojin explained, slumping down on the couch next to the barista.

"Benefit of the doubt…", Minho sighed, shaking his head. 

"And enough money…", Seungmin added angrily. "I'm sure the lawsuit would've gone through if it was the other way round. That damn bastard! I can't believe he's getting away with it!"

"But at least he's barred from entering the coffee shop again. He can't go against that because Minho owns it, right?", Changbin asked while pulling his angry boyfriend into his lap, cuddling him to calm him down again.

"True. I have the right to determine if he's allowed to enter or not. And he's definitely not! He won't be able to hurt you again, Woojin…"

Woojin smiled a bit. It was only a small silver lining on the horizon but it was something.

"Thank you…”

But it still hurt him to know that Dohyun was cleared of all accusations, now very well knowing that Woojin had reported him to the police. His threat came back to his mind. 

_You’re going to regret this, Woojin._

He hoped he wouldn’t. But he also knew what Dohyun was capable of. 

He was afraid.

And his fear started to get the best of him. 

He relapsed.

Chan watched sadly when Seungmin tried to coax his brother to go out with them, how he tried to include him in every activity they did. It hurt him to see the younger’s sad face every time Woojin declined with the same excuses.

“Hyung’s not coming with us…”, Seungmin said, closing the door behind him and meeting the rest of them in the hall.

“It’s okay… maybe he’ll join us next time. Don’t worry…” Changbin was smiling encouragingly.

“And we don’t have to stay too long if you’re too worried, Minnie! Two or three drinks and then we can head home again.”, Jisung added, pulling him with him. They all knew how worried Seungmin was about his older brother, how much it also affected him. And they didn’t want him to relapse too. 

They entered the small bar a few streets away from their apartments, getting shown to their reserved table instantly. The first two drinks were easy, their chatter light and simple until they eventually turned back to the usual heavy topic that has weighed upon them the last few weeks. 

Woojin.

“How is he holding up? In general at the moment?”, Minho asked. He had reduced his shifts to a minimum and always had another barista on hand to jump in. He wanted to give Woojin as much rest as he needed if it got too much for him.

Seungmin smiled a bit. “He’s got good and bad days… He’s taking it pretty hard that his meds got increased again after he did so well… He’s trying. But it’s not easy for him.”

“But it’s better than the last time…”, Chan explained further. “He’s opening up more, at least to me from time to time. But he’s afraid… He’s still having nightmares about Dohyun.”

“But he hasn’t seen that dick since the incident, right? He’s not coming into Minho’s coffee shop and I haven’t seen him around our apartment complex.”

“We haven’t seen him around, Sungie, that’s true… but he’s still afraid. Thinking of Dohyun’s threat, not knowing if anything will happen or not… it would take a toll on all of us. Even more on him with everything that happened in his past…”

“Is there anything we can do? Anything to keep his mind of? So he’s not overthinking…?”

Seungmin shook his head. “Probably not yet… not with his birthday coming up…”

“What? Why?”

“He hates it… we never celebrated our birthdays and our parents seemed to use the day to show us even more how worthless we are… the only presents we got were bruises…”

“Shit… that… when’s his birthday…?”, Changbin looked at him worriedly. They had never spoken about it and none of them would have expected this. 

“In two weeks… April 8th…”

Jisung nodded. “Do you think we should still celebrate his birthday…? Just us? And nothing big? Watching a movie and order food? Something like that. I mean, yeah, you said he hates it, but maybe we can show him that it’s not a bad day? And maybe it would help him a bit?”

Seungmin wasn’t sure about it. They never spoke about it and he was afraid it would trigger his episode even more, hurt him even more. It never has been a great day in their lives, especially in Seokjin’s and Woojin’s. He didn’t want to make it worse.

Before he could answer Chan interrupted him. “Seungmin, do you remember what I told you once? That he needs something to do? I think work is not enough to keep him busy anymore, especially not now. But I might have an idea…”

An idea Seungmin liked. It wasn’t perfect and he knew it could backfire, backfire a lot actually. But he wanted to try it. For Woojin and for himself. Because he couldn’t see him suffer anymore and and he would grasp onto every little thing if it might be helping his brother, would try everything.

Chan was in charge of the present while Seungmin tried talking Woojin into actually celebrating his birthday this year.

“It’s your 23rd birthday, hyung… give it a chance…”

Woojin sighed. “I don’t want to, Seungmin… it’s just a day as any other…”

“But we celebrated mine too last year. With the others. And you said it might be good and would help me associate something positive with the day.”

“I know what I said…”

“And it helped me! Please hyung… it’s only us six…”

“It’s not worth the stress. I have work on that day anyways.”

Seungmin grew frustrated. Everything was working well. They had a cake, they had Woojin’s present and everyone was free. He didn’t want to give up now.

“You only have to work until one. So we have the whole afternoon. We don’t have to go out. Just in the big apartment. Watching a movie or something. It’s like any other meet up we have. Just adding a cake and your birthday.”

“Fine.”, Woojin eventually gave in. He was tired of discussing. 

“So that’s a yes? You’re going to celebrate with us?”

“Yes. If it means so much to you and makes you happy…”

Seungmin laughed and hugged his brother tight. “Great! You don’t have to do anything! I’ll plan everything, okay?”

“Thank you…”, he said defeatedly, hugging the younger back. He still didn’t like the idea but he also didn’t want to disappoint Seungmin.

Still, Woojin dreaded the day coming up. Last year they still had been with their parents. About a month later they finally got out. And now they expected him to celebrate his birthday, be happy about it. 

The last few days leading up to it only made him think about what had happened in the last eleven months. And what they’ve been through the years before. He was close to call off the birthday get together. In the end he couldn’t bring himself to do it when he saw how happy it made Seungmin, how excited he was about celebrating his birthday for the first time.

He still took his time walking home from his shift, still trying to play out as much time as he could. He felt weird. Like something was up.

When he got up this morning no one was around. Not even Chan, who has now moved in with him in the small apartment, swapping places with Seungmin. It was odd. Chan never got up before him, always waited until Woojin was gone before he got ready for his day. And in the rare case he needed to leave before him he left him a note. But today there had been nothing. 

Seungmin had at least texted him.

 **[Minnie]:** Happy Birthday, hyung! I can’t wait for later ♥ We still need to get a few things for the get together. But I’ll see you later! ♥ I love you ♥

It had made Woojin smile but couldn’t ease the weird feeling he had.

When he eventually got home Seungmin was already waiting for him in the small apartment, not even giving him a second when he stepped into the living room and hugged him tight.

“Happy Birthday, Woojinnie…”, he mumbled into his chest.

“Thank you, Minnie…”

“Do you want to get changed before we go next doors?”

“Yes, please… I need to freshen up a bit.”

Woojin went into the bathroom real quick and changed out of his work clothes into a comfortable pair of jeans and a thin sweatshirt before following Seungmin into the other apartment. He was nervous.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” 

He was greeted by hugs, being pulled into a big group hug. And he laughed, couldn’t stop himself from laughing for the first time in weeks, happiness flooding his body.

“Thank you…”, he whispered, leaning a bit onto Chan who was standing directly next to him. It still felt different, but a better different than he had expected. He felt happy and loved.

“Come on in, you two!”, Chan said, leading them to the big couch where they had already prepared everything. Drinks, a cake and other snack were on the small table and blankets were spread out in case anyone would get cold. Woojin sat down.

“We thought about ordering dinner later if that’s okay.”, Seungmin said while snuggling up to his brother.

“But first you have to blow out the candles and then open your present!” Chan was grinning at him, carrying a big box in his hands. Woojin was stunned. He hadn’t expected anything besides this, least of all a present this big. 

He blew out the candles on the cake before Chan carefully handed him his present. Shockingly he looked at his younger brother when he felt something move inside. 

“What-?”, he whispered, knowing he wouldn’t get an answer from him but his smile reassured him. 

Carefully he opened the lid and couldn’t believe his eyes. A small King Charles Spaniel puppy was looking back at him, wagging her tail happily when she saw him.

Woojin looked up into smiling faces, still speechless about the puppy. 

“You always took care of me, hyung… and we both know that it’s not really needed anymore. But I know you need something like this, need a purpose, and we thought maybe the little one here can help you with that.”, Seungmin explained, caressing his brother’s back. 

“She doesn’t have a name yet. But the breeder said it was the second litter of puppies and all her siblings have a name that starts with B. But we wanted you to choose a name for her.”, Chan explained further.

Woojin looked down again, watched the puppy stand on her hind paws and holding onto the edge of the box, tail still wagging. Carefully he finally took her out of the box with shaking hands, realisation slowly sinking in that this was real.

“You got me a puppy…”, Woojin whispered, holding the little one close to his chest, watching her snuggle up to him.

“We did…”

“Oh my god-...”, it finally broke out of him and he started sobbing, weeping freely when he felt arms around him again, hugging him softly with the puppy in his arms.

“It’s going to be okay, hyung… and maybe the little one can help you get better faster … and even if not, now you always have someone by your side, have someone to care about and a reason to get up on your bad days. It’s going to be okay. You’re going to be okay and we’re all by your side helping you with that.”, Seungmin whispered.

He was right. He wasn’t alone and he couldn’t give up on himself now. The puppy needed him and he had to get better to care for her.

And he finally wanted to get better, for the puppy, for his friends, for himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had planned something completely different for this chapter. But I haven't felt well in the last few days and somehow got the idea to include Berry here so... here's Berry ♥
> 
> I hope you liked the chapter! :) 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/_sammyjw) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 16:  
> /

When Woojin woke up the morning after his birthday he felt something wet on his cheeks. Scrunching his face he tried to wipe it away but it was to no avail. It came back. 

He heard Chan chuckle next to him and only now realised the small weight on his chest. 

Sleepily he opened his eyes and looked up into the happy face of his puppy. It made him smile.

“See, little one? I told you this would work…”, Chan said, smile in his voice obvious.

“What would work?” Woojin’s voice was still full of sleep but he was sure Chan had understood him.

“I told her to lick your face to wake you up so we can go on her morning walk. There’s no sleeping in anymore from now on, Woojinnie.”

“I never sleep longer than eight anyways, so I’m fine with that. I’m more worried about you.”

“Well, luckily she isn’t my dog, so you have to get up and go on a walk with her while I can stay in bed and sleep in.”

“And still you’re up already, ready to go on the walk with us!”, Woojin laughed. He could see that Chan had already gotten as attached to the little puppy as he had. And he couldn’t blame him. 

She was lovely. Cuddly to no end and always looked like she was smiling at them. And still so playful that she’d played with them until she fell asleep in his arms yesterday, not yet knowing when to stop until she was too exhausted. 

“Do you have decided on a name for her yet?”, Chan eventually asked, pulling Woojin out of his thoughts.

Woojin nodded

“Berry.”

“Berry? That’s actually really cute.”

“I think it fits her. You said she was the B-litter of the breeder and to be honest I love baking with berries because of their natural sweetness.”

“And she’s a natural sweetheart, too… it fits her very well, Woojinnie…”

Woojin smiled happily, watching Berry play with the wrinkles of the bedding while they had been talking.

“She is… want to join us on our morning walk?”, Woojin smiled at his friend, smile only growing wider when Chan jumped out of the bed, telling him to hurry up so they can go. He was definitely really attached to her.

Woojin picked up Berry from the bed and let her run after Chan, following them into the living room.

“I’ll be right with you.”, he said, before making a beeline to the bathroom to quickly brush his teeth and get changed. 

The morning walk felt great. Woojin could get used to this. Especially with Chan by his side. They walked a big round with Berry, past bakeries and coffee shops, offices and supermarkets, through the nearby park and slowly back home.

He enjoyed watching Berry curiously inspect everything, running after a few birds and playing with other dogs they came across. It made him feel normal, made him feel that his life was finally going to be okay and that it was going up again. He would have never thought Berry would have such a calming and healing effect on him. 

Their shared morning walks became a routine. Every morning Chan would get up with them, whether the weather was nice and sunny or cold and rainy. It slowly became Woojin’s favourite time of the day, always looking forward to getting up and spend these sometimes short and sometimes longer walks with Chan. It was their time of the day, a time no one could barge in any second, the time where Chan started to link their arms together when it was raining one morning and they had to share the umbrella and kept doing it every day after. It made Woojin happy and he could get used to this, wanted to get used to it.

“Do you think I’m selfish…?”, he asked his younger brother a few evenings later when they were alone, the three artists being away for the weekend for a convention. 

He felt Seungmin look at him but kept his eyes on Berry in his lap.

“Excuse me, what...?”

“Do you think I’m selfish?”

“I understood that, hyung… but… what makes you think that? You’re the least selfish person I know…” The worry in Seungmin’s voice was obvious. 

“Chan…”

“Did he say that? Woojin, I swear I’ll kick his a-...”

“No!”, Woojin interrupted him, “No, he didn’t… it’s just…”, he sighed. He had never talked to him about his feelings for Chan, has never talked to anyone about it.

“Chan… he’s always with me, right…? And if he keeps that up… he can never find someone he likes… never fall in love with someone or get into a relationship… I don’t want to keep him from being happy but at the same time I don’t want this to change…”, he tried to explain, still avoiding the core of it.

“You want him to find someone but actually you don’t?”

“I… I don’t want to lose him…”

“But Woojin… even if he gets into a relationship at one point, you won’t lose him… I’m with Changbin now and you still have me…”

Woojin nodded. Seungmin was right, but it wasn’t the same situation. It was completely different.

He felt his brother study him, watch his every reaction, watching him fight with himself internally. He didn’t want to say it but he had to, otherwise it would keep eating him up from inside.

“Woojin… that’s not what you mean, right…?”, the younger asked softly, taking his hand and trying to coax it out of him in his own pace. 

Woojin shook his head.

“It’s different… because Changbin is a friend and you’re my brother…”

“And because you’re in love with Chan…”, Seungmin finished his sentence, speaking out the words he didn’t dare to and taking the burden away from him.

Woojin still didn’t dare to look at him, being frozen in place and feeling tears dwell in his eyes.

He nodded.

“I know he doesn’t love me back-... how could he-...? I’m far too high maintenance for a relationship-... but it feels so nice being with him and… having him here all day-... I don’t want him to find someone else-... but I don’t want to keep him from being happy-...” 

He knew he sounded pathetic, desperate even. But it was all he could think of. He wanted Chan to be happy, but he didn’t want to lose him, didn’t want him to find someone else and leave him behind. He wanted to be the one Chan loves but at the same time he was afraid of it. Was afraid that he would get hurt again, that somehow history would repeat itself.

“Hyung…”, Seungmin whispered and pulled him close, hugging him tight against his chest. “I don’t know a lot about love and relationships but… I’m sure feeling this is normal when you love someone. You don’t want to see them with someone else… but you also don’t want to make a first step, right?”

“I don’t want to lose him, Minnie-... how could he like someone like me back-...? He deserves someone better… someone he doesn’t have to worry and care for the whole time-...”

“And what if he likes you back…?”

Woojin shook his head again. It couldn’t be.

“Are you afraid of that…?”

“What if it’s going to end like the last time again-...? I can’t do that-...”

“Woojin!”, Seungmin took his face between both his hands, forced him to look at him, concern but also seriousness and sincerity in his eyes and his voice. “Woojin, listen to me. He’s not Dohyun. He will never hurt you like that, do you understand me? _Never_. It’s so obvious you’re important to him. He’s been gone for one day and you’ve been constantly texting each other, even though he’s working. He even video called you yesterday because he missed you, Changbin told me. I don’t know if he’s in love with you, but I can tell you for sure that he’ll never treat you like Dohyun did, that he’ll never treat you wrong. You deserve someone like him, Woojin. You of all people do…”

Woojin was sobbing even more. Somewhere far back in his mind he knew that Seungmin was right, knew that Chan would never do this to him. But he was afraid, afraid of loving him and being loved by him. 

“Don’t close yourself off… Don’t talk yourself into believing you don’t deserve him… You do… you really do… and you don’t know what will happen in the future. You never know, hyung… maybe he loves you back… and if he does then please don't stand in your own way… let it happen okay? Please let yourself be happy…"

“I’ll try-...”, Woojin whispered, not daring to talk louder in fear that his voice would crack. Chan would never hurt him, he knew that. And still he couldn’t stop that tiny voice in the back of his head that it would happen, that he would be the one hurting again and that he wasn’t worth of Chan’s love.

“It’s going to be okay, hyung… I’m here okay? You can always come to me if you want to talk about your feelings… I’m not going to tell anyone about it, I promise…”, Seungmin whispered softly. It was still slightly odd for him to be the one to spend comfort but he hoped he could give Woojin back everything he’d done for him, show him that he was also a shoulder he could lean on and that he could always come to him with his problems and feelings. Seungmin would do everything he could for him if it would make him happy again.

“Thank you, Minnie…”, Woojin replied silently, realising again that he still had a long road ahead of him. A road that seemingly had no end. It was frustrating.

He spent the rest of the day with Seungmin, talking some more about his feelings and how he was doing, but also about Seungmin’s relationship. 

Woojin loved seeing how his brother’s eyes lit up when he started talking about Changbin, how much he was in love with him and how happy he made him. He was proud of him and of how far he’d come. His grades had gradually gotten better since they had moved in here so Woojin was sure that Seungmin would soon graduate and then start university. And if they were lucky he could also soon stop taking meds and reduce his therapy sessions to a minimum. A goal he himself was far away from but it made him only prouder that Seungmin had reached this point so fast and without any relapses. 

One day he would get there too.

“Are you sure it’s okay for you to sleep alone tonight?”, Seungmin asked when it had gotten late, both of them growing more tired with every passing minute.

“I’m going to be fine. I have Berry with me and Chan wanted to call again later. But I’ll let you know when something’s up, okay?”

“Promise?”

“I promise, Minnie. Please don’t worry. I know today has been a lot but I’m feeling good.

Seungmin seemed to be convinced. “Okay. Then sleep well, hyung… and greet Channie-hyung from me, will you?”

“Of course. Say Hi to Changbin too if you’re talking, yeah?”

After one last hug he closed the door behind the younger and looked down at Berry who was looking back expectantly. 

“We’re going to bed now, hm? And maybe talk to Channie if he’s back already, okay?”, he said to her after picking her up, pressing a soft kiss to the top of her head. 

Woojin quickly got changed in the bathroom and made a beeline through the kitchen to take his meds before he went to the bedroom, making himself comfortable on the too empty bed and letting his puppy snuggle up to him under his blanket like every night.

It didn’t take long after that for Chan to actually call him.

“Woojinnie! You’re still awake! I was afraid I missed you because it’s already pretty late. But we just came back from dinner and Changbin and Jisung wanted to get another drink at the bar so I headed to our room alone.”, Chan greeted him with the biggest smile that showed his dimples. He loved them.

“Barely awake but yeah…”, Woojin answered softly, “How was your day? I hope as successful as yesterday?”

“It was! I did a few smaller tattoos today again. But it was more successful for the other two.”

“Oh? Why’s that?”

“Well… I may or may not have lost a bet that I can be off my phone for an hour and not text you back and maybe I owe them a self-made cake now.”, Chan explained with a faint blush on his cheeks.

“You guys made a bet? Seriously?”, Woojin laughed not quite believing what he just heard. He always thought Chan was a diligently and hard-working man. But that he couldn’t stop texting him throughout the day made him happy. He had gotten used to Chan being around him most of the time that he already missed him.

“That’s not the point here! I can’t bake! I’ve never baked a cake or even cookies!”, Chan pouted.

“I’ll help you with that, Channie… I mean I’m kind of to blame for that lost bet, right?”

“You are!”, the younger laughed, “but you’re the best! I hope I won’t be all thumbs then!”

Woojin chuckled. “We’ll see…”

“How was your day, Woojinnie? Did you spend it with Seungmin like you planned to?”

He nodded and started telling him what they’d been up to, leaving out the talk they had about his feelings. Chan didn’t need to know about that. Not yet at least. 

Smiling softly he went back to listening to Chan talk about the tattoos he did that day and about the new contacts they had made. But with every word the younger uttered his eyes grew more tired. 

He didn’t want to just fall asleep on him. But he felt his meds kick in and since he already had been tired before he wasn’t able to stop it. 

At least he fell asleep with a smile on his face.

* * *

Chan watched Woojin slowly fall asleep. It was cute how hard he had fought to stay awake but fell asleep nevertheless. 

“Cute…”, he whispered into the silence of the room. He knew he should hang up so Woojin could sleep but he couldn’t keep his eyes of him, his soft and relaxed features, his slightly parted lips. He looked beautiful. Even with his still slightly red eyes. Chan was sure he had been crying earlier, had probably talked about a few things with Seungmin that had piled up over the last few weeks. 

He wished he could be with him now, physically, and not only show him over the phone that he wasn’t alone.

“Aren’t you talking to each other or why is it this silent in here?”, Changbin asked suddenly and Chan jumped. He had been too deep in his own thoughts that he hadn’t heard him and Jisung come back.

“No… Woojin fell asleep…”, he answered truthfully.

“And now you’re watching him sleep? Creep…”, Jisung chuckled and threw himself onto the bed next to Chan.

“At least take a screenshot. He looks cute with Berry all cuddled up to him”

“And you call me creep…”, Chan mumbled and looked back at the screen to end the call. He took the screenshot before doing so.

“How is he doing? Minnie said they’d been talking a lot today.”, Changbin asked after sitting down on his other side.

“Mhm… they have spent the day together. He’s okay I think… looked like he’d been crying a lot earlier today… but I didn’t want to ask…”

“And still you’re worried out of your mind, Channie…”, Jisung commented from the side, studying his hyung precisely.

“Of course I am… the one time I’m not home and he’s apparently not feeling well… I promised him to be there for him and help him if he needs me…” Chan sighed, not knowing he was the cause for Woojin’s pain. He felt like he had broken his promise, like he had failed him. 

“You really are in love with him, right…?”

It was more a statement than a question and still it made Chan jump slightly, looking at his younger friend with big eyes. He had never talked to them about it, had only mentioned once that he thought he was falling in love with him but that had been months ago.

“What?”

Changbin chuckled. “It’s kinda obvious… to us at least. You always thought he’s hot, even before we knew them…. and if I’m correct you told us you like him a few months back.”

“And even if we ignore all that... You’re constantly talking about him if you’re not together, chatting with him, the video calls… and you look so happy doing that. I haven’t seen you like this in such a long time, hyung…”, Jisung added with a smile.

“It’s really that obvious, huh…?”, the oldest saw no point in denying it, not in front of the two people that knew him best. 

“Does he know?”

“Of course not! There’s still so much happening for him and I don’t want to burden him with that too.”

“Burden him?” Jisung raised his eyebrows.

“Like I said. He’s got enough things to handle already. I don’t want to burden him with my feelings and make things awkward between us. I mean… I had to move out again, right? And I don't want him to be alone and Seungmin neither so Minnie would probably move back next doors but that wouldn't be good for your relationship, Binnie.", Chan started rambling, not noticing how the other two were exchanging looks over his head.

"Okay…. Take a step back, Channie… first, nothing will ruin or harm my relationship with Seungmin… don't worry about that yeah? And second, since when are you overthinking everything? You've never done that…", Changbin started and put a calming hand on his shoulder.

"You're really serious about him…"

Chan nodded in response. Jisung was right. He was serious about Woojin, he didn't want to accidentally hurt him, which is why he never made a move. 

Jisung sighed and leaned back a bit, looking at the ceiling. 

"I don't think… that you have to worry that much… sure, he's really carrying a lot of baggage but… I don't think you'd add to that…", he carefully began, his gaze still fixed on the ceiling.

"I think Sungie is right... he's trusting you so much and… next to Seungmin he's talking to you the most about his problems and if he doesn't feel well… it would surprise me if those feelings weren't mutual…"

"Did Seungmin say something about it?", Chan asked Changbin directly.

"No, actually not. And I don't think he would since it's really private. But I have eyes, Channie… have you never noticed how he looks at you?"

The oldest shook his head.

"His eyes always light up when he sees you… he looks at you like you're his entire world…"

Jisung's last sentence stuck to Chan's mind even long after they went to bed. It kept him from falling asleep.

Did Woojin really look at him like that? Did he feel the same? 

Chan tried to think about it. Changbin and Jisung weren't wrong. Woojin did confide in him a lot. A lot more than in the others and sometimes even a lot more than in Seungmin. But did that really mean he loved him back? 

He wasn’t sure but he hoped it. He had never felt like that about anyone, never felt a love this genuine and serious towards someone other than Woojin. And he never had been afraid of rejection this much. He didn’t want to lose Woojin over this.

_He looks at you like you’re his entire world._

Was he really? He trusted them with this. Jisung had already been right about Seungmin’s feelings for Changbin. Could he be right again? Or had it been a coincidence?

Chan sighed. He was tired but there were so many questions and scenarios in his head. What if they were right and he was standing in his own way of finding the love of his life?

He had to watch and observe. He didn’t want to risk it without being sure. 

Maybe it would work out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof this was probably the longest chapter I've ever written and actually I planned even more for it which will now happen in chapter 17
> 
> Also I still referred to Berry as "he" in the last chaoter but changed that. I kinda always thought Berry was a boy ;;
> 
> I hope you liked it even though it was so long! Probably a chapter that was long overdue! :) The change in pov was really fun and I liked writing 3racha in this uwu
> 
> Thank you so much for reading ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/softkwj) :)  
> (the links from the previous chapters won't work anymore cause I changed my @ but I'm too lazy to change that now)


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 17:  
> \- violence  
> \- (internalized) homophobia  
> \- victim blaming

Chan had never seen Woojin laugh so much. 

But then again he had never tried to grab the flour from the top shelf in the kitchen, tipping it over in the process and bathing himself in the white dust.

He was sure Woojin was going to suffocate soon. 

“Stop laughing!”, he eventually managed to say when the dust around him cleared and wiped some of it out of his eyes.

“I'm sorry-... but when you said you couldn’t bake I didn't think you'd already struggle with getting the flour!”, the older replied with a chuckle, breathless from all the laughing.

“Go and get cleaned up, Channie… I’ll clean the kitchen and then we can start… Good thing I always have an extra bag of flour at home…”

Chan shot another offended and embarrassed glance at his still giggling friend before walking into the bathroom to get changed. He hadn’t expected to fail the easiest step either and wearing all black hadn’t been the best idea. But then again, he barely had a different colour in their shared closet.

When he came back Woojin had already cleaned up the mess he’d made and a new bag of flour was standing on the countertop.

“You can’t tell the others about that. I will never live that down if Changbin and Jisung get to know about that!”, Chan mumbled with rosy cheeks.

“Don’t worry, I won’t. But I will treasure that memory forever…”

“Fine!”, Chan pouted, “So… what are we making now?”

“First I thought about chocolate or cheesecake but I’m sure they’d expect that. So we’re going to bake a light and fresh lemon chiffon cake with whipped cream and strawberries.”

“A what?”

Woojin chuckled softly. “A chiffon cake. We already made it a few times for the coffee shop and it does take some time but it tastes really good… what we’re going to make today is basically a layered cake. First the cake, then a layer of whipped cream, then strawberries, cake again, whipped cream, strawberries and the same layers again a third time.”

Chan nodded. He still couldn’t imagine what it was going to be but he trusted Woojin. And if he said it tasted good then he’d believe it.

“Why does it take so long to make? Isn’t it… just cake?”

“More or less. But there are a few different steps to make the batter and we need to have the cake completely cooled off after baking otherwise the whipped cream will melt again…”

The younger nodded again. That made sense but he had never thought that there would be so much to think about when baking, but then again he had also never given it a proper thought before anyways. 

He let Woojin tell him what to do, first measuring everything into bowls so they’d have it ready on hand. It was great to watch Woojin being in his element, seeing the sparkle in his eyes and the soft smile on his lips. If he hadn’t been in love with him already, Chan was sure this would be the moment he’d completely fall for him.

“Why are you separating the eggs?”

“To make a meringue later. It’s to make the cake fluffy like a cloud.”, Woojin explained and placed the last small bowl onto the countertop.

“Okay… first step, Channie… take the big bowl and put all the dry ingredients inside and whisk them together…”, Woojin instructed him and Chan followed strictly, even making the well in the middle.

“Perfect. And now we take the other big bowl and whisk together our wet ingredients and the lemon zest, but not the egg whites. We need them later. Then we’ll whisk together our wet and dry ingredients.”

Woojin watched closely as Chan did what he said, explaining each step to him and answering his questions. As chaotic as their baking session had started, Chan wasn’t that bad in the end. He was doing an amazing job. Even making the meringue worked out just fine.

“Let me guess. Now I have to mix our batter with the cloudy stuff?”, Chan asked after putting down the bowl with the meringue.

“Yes. But you need to fold it together.”

“I, what? Fold it?”

Woojin chuckled. “I’ll help you with that… take the spatula and put about one third of the meringue into the batter… That’s enough, good…”, he explained while stepping behind Chan. Softly he placed his hands on Chan’s, guiding them.

“It’s easy. You scoop underneath the batter and fold over and then turn the bowl. It keeps the air in so the cake will be fluffy and light.”

The butterflies in Chan’s stomach started fluttering when he felt the older being so close, having him wrap his arms around him and holding his hands. 

Being close was nothing new, they always cuddled when they went to bed, but this was different. He had never been in Woojin’s embrace like this and if he was being honest he wanted to stay like this forever. It felt good.

“Are you still with me, Channie?”, Woojin pulled him from his thoughts and he blinked a few times before turning his head, meeting his gaze. 

And only now did Woojin realise how close they were, blushing furiously. 

He stepped back again and Chan already missed his arms around him.

“Uhm… now.. just do that with the rest, too… I’m going to line the baking pans with parchment paper…”, he mumbled, obviously trying to keep his composure. 

Chan thought it was cute.

Woojin helped him distribute the batter into the three pans before they shoved them in the oven for the next 30 minutes to bake and letting them cool off afterwards. They cleaned everything up in the meantime and even went on a quick walk with Berry.

“Have they cooled off enough?”, Chan asked when they stepped back into the small kitchen, watching Woojin inspect the cakes.

“Yes… we can stack and ice them with the whipped cream now… Just let me get my turntable real quick. It will be easier for you to ice evenly...”

It wasn’t. 

He still managed to get the whipped cream everywhere.

“You said it would be easy, Woojinnie…”, Chan pouted, ignoring Woojin’s chuckles and giggles.

“It is actually one of the easiest steps, Channie…”

“Well apparently it’s not for me! And maybe you have to help me again like you helped me with the folding so it won’t look like a complete massacre!”, Chan shot back, hoping Woojin would take the hint.

Woojin stared at him for a second, trying to process what Chan meant before a soft smile spread across his face. Lovingly he wrapped his arms around him again, placing his hands on Chan's, guiding them once more.

“See…? It’s not that hard…”, he mumbled, leaning his head against Chan’s shoulder and even staying close and wrapping his arms around his waist while the younger finished the rest of the cake on his own.

It didn’t look as well as if Woojin had made it alone and it was far from being perfect, but it looked good and like something you’d want to eat.

“You did it, Channie… you made the cake! And it looks really good too! I’m sure Jisung and Changbin will like it…”, Woojin whispered proudly, not yet ready to break of the embrace. 

It felt right to be this close to Chan, to have him in his arms like this, having him fit perfectly against his body like the puzzle piece he’d always been missing.

“Only because of you… thank you for your help, Woojinnie…”, Chan whispered into his hair after turning his head slightly, pressing a soft kiss to his temple.

Woojin still thought about the gesture a few days later, blushing slightly when he looked at the same type of cake he had just finished baking, carrying it to the front.

Minho chuckled softly when he saw it. 

“Do I have to rename it to Channie’s cake?”, he joked as he watched Woojin putting it into the showcase next to the other pastries and sweets, making the baker blush furiously, the thought and feeling of the kiss coming back to his mind.

“Don’t worry, Jinnie! I won’t do that… It’s just cute that you made the cake again. Though, it looks a lot better than Chan’s take on it…”

“Well, he did his best… and it tasted good, that’s all that matters in the end, right?”, Woojin chuckled.

“True. I’m pretty sure he had some professional help, though~”, Minho grinned at him and Woojin neither confirmed nor denied his implication.

“Do you think you can handle the shop alone for the last two hours later, Jinnie? I can stay with you if you want to.”

“I’m fine. It’s not the first time I did it, right? Go home and spend some alone time with Sungie before we have our movie marathon… You’ve barely seen each other in the last few weeks…”, Woojin replied with a genuine smile. 

One of their baristas had quit and Minho worked a lot of overtime to step in until the new barista started the job. 

Minho hugged him softly. “Thank you… close on time later, okay? I’m sure we’re going to order food so it will arrive at the same time as you. Is chicken okay? Or should we order something different?”

“Chicken is fine, otherwise let Minnie choose for me, he knows what I like. And now off you go to do the paperwork before you waste your precious time even more, Minho!”, he shooed him into his office until he was ready to go home and Woojin was alone. 

There wasn’t much to do at this time. A few night owls stopped by for a big coffee but barely anyone stayed inside the coffee shop so Woojin used the time to clean up thoroughly, sweeping the floor and tables and cleaning up behind the counter before he eventually closed the shop. He checked if the doors were locked properly before he headed out through the back entrance and made his way home.

It was already getting dark outside, the wind still a bit chilly and Woojin pulled his jacket tighter around him, hoping it wouldn’t start raining before he got home.

The whole atmosphere around him made him feel uneasy somehow, even making him turn around a few times when he heard something behind him but ultimately seeing nothing.

Still he had the feeling he was being followed ever since he left the coffee shop.

“You’re imagining things, Woojin… you’re just paranoid…”, he mumbled to himself and took the shortcut through the park that usually was full of people during that time of the day. 

Had he known that barely a few couples were around due to the imminent rain, he would have taken the long way home.

Woojin stopped in his tracks when he heard the clinking of glass behind him, only to see a couple with what appeared to be soju bottles a few metres away. 

He exhaled deeply, glad that he was only a few minutes away from home now because the paranoid state he was in made him unbearably anxious.

He turned around again and yelped in shock when he looked directly into Dohyun’s face, right in front of him.

“Hello Woojin.”, Dohyun said calmly, his expression staying blank, unreadable. 

Woojin felt ice cold shivers run down his spine. 

He wanted to run, but before he could react and set his body into motion Dohyun was already shoving him down a barely lit path towards the even less lit public restrooms, a place in this park where Woojin knew no one would pass by this late.

“Did you really think reporting me to the police was a good idea?”, Dohyun hissed, forcefully pushing him against the cold stonewall. “Don’t you think I have enough money to have my lawyer get me out of that?”

Woojin felt him get closer and turned his head away but Dohyun had other plans. He felt Dohyun’s hand in his hair, closing to a fist, yanking his head back to force him to face him, holding him in place.

“I could _kill_ you and get away with it, Woojin! You're nothing compared to me, remember that! _Nothing_!"

Woojin froze, panic setting in, his heart beating faster and heavier in his chest. 

He couldn't mean that, couldn't mean what he was implying.

"And still you got everything! I _hate_ you!"

Dohyun took a step back again, leaving Woojin to think for a moment that he could flee and run away. 

Until he felt the first punch to the side of his face.

He tumbled back into the wall, disoriented, already feeling another punch hit his face, making him stumble to the side and hitting the cold and hard floor without having the chance to brace himself for the fall.

Dohyun was over him in an instance, pinning him down. 

“Everything was fine until you suddenly showed up again! You should’ve followed your brother! Then I wouldn't be having all these problems now!”

With every sentence Woojin felt another hit, to his face, his head, his chest, his sides.

And he was sure that this was it. 

Dohyun was going to kill him and there was nothing he could do about it. 

Fear was still reigning over his body, keeping him frozen in place. 

He was barely able to shield his face from more hits, already tasting blood, his vision blurry with tears.

“Don’t-... please-...!”, he managed to choke out, but instead of mercy Dohyun only showed more rage.

“Please what, hm?! Do you think you deserve an ounce of mercy?! After everything you’ve done?! You don’t! Not a single bit! This is your fault, Woojin! You brought this upon yourself! This could’ve been all different if you’d just had the guts to stand up to our friends back then! But you ran away! You left me there! And now you have to live with the consequences!”

Dohyun wasn’t shouting at him, but he wasn’t calm either, the anger and rage was obvious in his voice, and it frightened Woojin even more. He didn’t dare to fight back, not even talk back to him.

“Nothing to say? You know you’ve fucked up, right? You’re pathetic, Woojin! You know we could’ve had everything! But no! You had to play the poor baker boy, the damsel in distress waiting to be rescued! You got what you wanted! Your knight in shining armour that rescued you from your miserable life! That what? Turned into your boyfriend? That you can live your life with now?! Without having to fear what society thinks about you because you’re already the lowest scum!”

Dohyun scoffed, pulling his head up at his hair again.

“You don’t know how good you’ve got it! That no one expects anything from you and you can live your sexuality freely! No one will bat an eye at you and your fucking boyfriend! It’s unfair, don't you think?! You’ve achieved nothing, did nothing and still you got everything! Why?! Why can you have this and I can’t?!”

Woojin’s head was whacked back onto the floor, pain shooting through his whole body. 

This time he tried to fight back, tried to push him away, his hands aimlessly trying to grab his shirt, his jacket, trying to bring some distance between them, if only so the next hit would miss him.

It was hopeless. 

Dohyun was still stronger than him.

“If you’d just stood up to our friends! This could all be different now! For you! For me! I could have lived happily! I could be free! But you had to ruin everything again, Woojin! You can’t do anything right! And now you’re forcing me to do this to you! It’s pathetic! You’re worth nothing, you are _nothing_!”, Dohyun was blinded by his anger, his hand slowly releasing Woojin’s hair, only to move to his neck, his fingers wrapping around it.

“Why haven’t you given up like your brother?! Why can’t you just be dead?!”

Woojin felt his fingers slowly closing around his neck. 

Far back in his mind he knew it wouldn’t be enough, that it wouldn’t even leave marks, but it was enough to finally snap him out of his fear, to finally make him fight back.

To fight for his _life_.

He shouted at Dohyun to stop and get away from him, screaming for help in the hope that anyone was close enough to hear him.

Again, he tried to push him away, and this time he finally caught Dohyun off guard, too distracted by his screams. He felt his weight lift off of his body and before he could see what was happening or where he was going, even if just to realise if he was preparing to swing at him again, he heard his footsteps distancing, quickening in pace as he ran away.

And suddenly Woojin was alone again, sitting as upright as he managed on the cold, wet floor. 

He coughed, trying to catch his breath again, his whole body hurting and shaking from it and he could feel warm blood drip down the side of his face from where Dohyun had banged his head on the floor.

Woojin tried to focus on his breathing, trying not to fall into a panic attack when realisation slowly sank in and the adrenaline wore off. 

He had to get up and finally make it home. 

As quickly as possible in case Dohyun decided to come back.

Carefully he tried to lift himself up, his head spinning, but instantly froze again when he heard steps coming closer, more than one pair of feet if he heard it correctly. 

He was sure Dohyun was back, this time bringing backup to finish what he had started.

“Oh God! Are you okay?? Honey, quick call the police and an ambulance!”, a young woman was suddenly by his side instead, carefully holding him upright in a sitting position, trying to make out his injuries in the dim light.

Woojin started to relax slightly with relief of having someone with him that wasn’t his attacker, but his clouded mind raced back into high alert when he realised what she had just said.

“No-... no police-... no ambulance-... I… I just want to go home-... please-...”, Woojin whispered hoarsely.

“Are you sure? Maybe they can get the person who did that… Have you seen his face?”, the man next to him lowered his phone again.

Woojin shook his head. “No… I didn’t…”, he lied, knowing far too well by now that the police wouldn’t do anything, would only make it worse and he didn’t want to know what Dohyun was capable of the next time.

"Do you live far from here...? We can bring you home…", the girl offered. Woojin knew from her worried tone that she didn't like that he denied calling for help, but he also knew they couldn't force him.

They both helped him up after he told them the apartment complex where he lived and that it was only a few minutes away and they helped him get there safely, holding him securely when he stumbled over thin air and when his sight got too blurred.

He bowed deeply before them when they finally arrived at the entrance door, feeling instantly how it made his head spin more.

"Thank you for your help…", he thanked them as firmly as his voice would let him, before turning around to enter the complex.

Now that the shock had worn off he wanted to lie down, wanted to cry and just curl himself up into a ball and never go outside again. 

The pain was getting unbearable, his whole sight was getting more and more blurry and his body begged him to stop, to sit down and rest.

But he also knew the others were waiting for him, were probably already worried out of their minds that he wasn't home yet.

So, instead of heading directly into his apartment he turned to the left and knocked at the door of the big apartment with whatever strength he had left, soon hearing footsteps coming closer behind the door.

Because as much as he wanted to hide and isolate himself now, he wanted nothing more than Chan's arms around him, wanted nothing more than the comfort of the man who had just opened the door and stared at him in shock, the glass in his hand slipping from his fingers, shattering into a thousand pieces on the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry c̶̶r̶̶i̶̶s̶̶i̶̶s̶ Christmas!
> 
> This chapter was brought to you by Rosanna Pansino's video How To Make A Summer Solstice Cake.
> 
> And as a nice Christmas present Dohyun is also back. I'm sorry. Kinda. 
> 
> I hope you still liked the chapter tho! Please leave a comment or kudos if you liked it! It was pretty hard for me to write tbh and I'm thankful my girlfriend gave me a bit of input here and there uwu ♥
> 
> Anyways the next chapter won't be up before 2020 so to everyone celebrating: Merry Christmas and a happy new year! May all your wishes come true in 2020 ♥ also thank you for sticking with me throughout the year! ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/softkwj) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 18:  
> /

To say Chan and Seungmin were furious after Woojin told them what had happened was an understatement. Both of them were pacing around the living room, livid that Dohyun had dared to attack him and mad at themselves that they weren't able to protect him.

"Can both of you please sit down and shut up?! We're all angry but it's doing no good to Woojin to have even more aggression around him right now!", Minho finally interfered, having enough of them voicing what they'd do to Dohyun would they see him on the street while he tried to tend to Woojin's wounds with Changbin, holding the still shaking baker in his arms while doing so.

He kept glaring at Chan and Seungmin when they finally sat down, who were obviously not happy about his scolding.

"How's your head, hyung…? Does it still hurt as bad?", Changbin asked softly, continuing to dab at the cut above his eyebrow to no avail. The blood wouldn't stop flowing.

Woojin nodded slightly, not daring to talk or move any more. He felt sick and everything around him was still spinning. He didn't want to make it worse.

Minho next to him sighed.

"We should head to the hospital… they need to check your head and other wounds and the cut on your forehead probably needs stitching…"

"No-... please-... they're just gonna call the police and-...", Woojin whispered, shaking his head. 

"We'll make sure they won't, okay? But you need a check up… we don't know if you're hurt internally and it's too risky to just let you stay here without professional help…", Jisung tried to calm him, softly caressing the back of his hand, "I promise, okay? They won't call the police…"

Woojin was still hesitant. What if they couldn't keep that promise? If the doctors called the police without telling them?

"Woojin… please be reasonable… we'll stay with you… but you need help… we're worried about you…", Minho tried again and the oldest eventually nodded. He knew they were right. But he was still afraid.

Chan watched the little back and forth, waiting with his phone in his hand and the already dialed number until Woojin agreed.

He told the dispatcher their address and what injuries he could make out but told a slight different story when asked what had happened. They didn't know and Woojin couldn't remember. It was plausible enough with his injured head.

They didn't have to wait long until the paramedics arrived and watched them treating the wounds they were able to treat on the spot, putting a pressure bandage to his forehead to stop the bleeding at least for now.

"Do you think he has to stay the night…?", Seungmin asked what they all wanted to know.

"Probably only for observation but it depends on the severity of his wounds and concussion. But one night is most likely, maybe two.", one of the paramedics answered after Woojin was secured on the stretcher. 

"We'll stay back and pack a bag for him, Minnie. Go with him. We'll catch up, okay?", Chan said, smiling a bit, but his voice was still monotonous. 

"I'll go with you so you don't have to be alone…", Minho assured the youngest.

"Text me the room number or where you are later okay? We'll be as quick as possible!", Jisung shouted after them before closing the door, sighing heavily. 

"What do we need to pack? A set of clothes? Maybe something comfortable and some toiletries?", Jisung asked, watching Chan as he sat down again, finally showing the full range of emotions.

“Hyung…?”, the youngest whispered softly, sitting down next to him and carefully took his hand in his own. Chan squeezed it.

“I failed him…”, he whispered sadly, “I’ve promised him to always protect him-... and now he’s in hospital because Dohyun still managed to get to him-... because we weren’t careful enough-...” 

Jisung pulled his friend into his arms when a sob ripped through him, holding him close.

“It’s not your fault, hyung… no one would’ve seen it coming… everything was so good recently…”

“That’s why we should’ve known! It was too calm… fuck-...”, Chan replied, sobbing even more. They should’ve known, should’ve known that Dohyun wouldn’t give up this easily, would be onto Woojin soon again. 

“We were too careless, Jisung! He had already threatened him and… God-... we shouldn’t have left him alone…”

“But we can’t be around him 24/7, hyung… You know that. And I’m sure he wouldn’t want that either…”, Changbin tried while softly caressing Chan’s back.

“I know he doesn’t want that! We talked about it… but we underestimated Dohyun! And we can’t even go to the police because Woojin doesn’t want us to…”

“Which is understandable… the last time he bought himself out of it and I’m sure he would do it again… fucking rich kid asshole…”, Changbin mumbled, flinching when Chan abruptly stands up to get his phone again.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m an idiot! I need to call Bambam.”

“Bambam? But why?”, Changbin was confused, he didn’t understand what Bambam had to do with that.

“Because I told him about Dohyun the last time he was at the parlour and he said I should call him the next time something happens with him. He apparently knows him from one of these rich people events. And I don’t know how this world works but he said something about being higher in hierarchy than him…”, the oldest in the room explained while already dialing Bambam’s number and putting him on speaker, praying that he’d pick up.

It didn’t take long until he heard the familiar voice.

“Channie! What can I do for you?”

“Bambam! I’m glad you picked up. I’m sorry that I have to skip the pleasantries this time but you told me to call you when Dohyun brings trouble again.”, Chan directly got to the point and he could feel his friend tense up on the other end of the phone.

“What has he done?”

“He attacked Woojin on his way home earlier… Woojin’s in the hospital now…”

Bambam was silent for a moment.

“Leave it to me, Channie. I’ll deal with him.”

“How?”, Jisung interrupted which made the older man chuckle.

“Ah.. Jisungie… I guess Changbinnie is also around?”

“I’m here… hi hyung…”, Changbin answered, feeling a bit embarrassed that Bambam didn’t know until now that they were listening.

“Hello Binnie… but to answer your question, Jisungie. The solution is easy. Money. And since I have more than him and I’m higher in hierarchy…”

Jisung nodded even though he knew the other couldn’t see it. It was what Chan had already told them. It made him sick to his stomach that enough money could deal with everything but right now he was also glad about it, glad that they had someone more influential on their side.

“Also I may or may not know a few things about him where I know that he doesn’t want them to be public. Did you for example know that there’s a call boy that looks pretty similar to Woojin from the right angle?”

“What?!”, all three of them asked in unisono.

“Just saying, I have seen them together once or twice. Do with that information whatever you want.”, Bambam chuckled, smile obvious in his voice, but quickly growing serious again. “I’ll deal with him, Channie, don’t worry. And if Woojin needs to get out of Seoul for a few days to bring some distance between himself and this whole mess let me know okay? The house on Jeju is free at the moment.”

Chan thought for a second. It might actually not be the worst idea to get Woojin away from Seoul, even if it’s only for the weekend. 

“I think I’ll come back to that offer sooner or later. Thank you Bambam… I owe you something…”

“You don’t. Dohyun has been annoying me for a while and toying around with him and putting some pressure on him is enough for me. Focus on your boy, okay? Go to Jeju, get him back on his feet and enjoy a few days off from everything here.”

Chan didn’t know how he deserved someone as Bambam as a friend. They’d had known each other for the better part of ten years already and he’d seen him rise to fame and money. And still he was one of the most humble people he knew, doing charities and donating, always helping out when he could, even in situations like this. 

He thanked him again, promising him to let him know about the Jeju trip and eventually hung up when Jisung showed him that Minho had texted them a few minutes ago.

“Then let’s hurry and pack everything Woojin needs and head to the hospital…”, Chan said and stood up, grabbing his weekend bag from the other room before they went next doors. He felt better, lighter, knowing that it would be okay from now on. He knew Bambam would keep his word and he knew it would work. And he knew that Woojin finally got the rest he desperately needed.

Half an hour later they arrived at the hospital, looking for the room Minho had texted them. They found the barista waiting outside of it.

“How’s Woojin? And where’s Seungmin?”, Changbin asked upon arriving, looking around.

“He’s okay. His ribs are bruised and the wound on his head needed stitching and he’s got a concussion… the rest is bruises and abrasions… Seungminnie is inside with him right now. They’re talking to the doctor and only family was allowed to be inside…”, Minho explained to them, smiling slightly.

“Did they say anything how long he has to stay?”

“Not yet. They’re probably talking about that now… one night for sure though…”

Chan nodded. He had already figured that Woojin had to stay at least one night, which is why he brought Berry with him, hoping the doctors and nurses wouldn’t mind for now. But he knew how much she helped and meant to the older.

They all entered the room together once the doctor allowed them to go in, scolding Chan about the dog but ultimately letting him inside when he explained that he was something like Woojin’s therapy dog.

“Hey…”, he whispered softly, sitting Berry down in Woojin’s lap before taking the chair next to the bed. “How are you doing, Woojin…?”

“I don’t know… still shocked…”, the baker whispered, already holding Berry close to his chest, cuddling her and letting her lick his face.

“How long do you have to stay…?”

“They are keeping him for at least two nights for now… the doctor wanted to make sure he’s okay and I already emailed his therapist so she might come here tomorrow…”, Seungmin jumped in for his brother, well knowing that he still felt nauseous even with all the meds he had gotten for his pain and nausea. Woojin just scrunched his face at that.

“I know you don’t like that, hyung… but at least you get some rest like that. I can stay with you if you want to. Or Chan-hyung… and I’m sure you can keep Berry here if we go on walks with her…”

And so they did.

Seungmin and Chan spent every waking minute at the hospital for the next three days, being with Woojin as much as possible, only leaving when they were ordered to do so by the doctor or nurse or when one of them went on a walk with Berry. They even stayed when his therapist visited Woojin, worrying about him and taking her time to talk to all three of them about the situation, where Chan mentioned the trip to Jeju. Woojin’s therapist was hooked on the idea and promised them to write them an official document so Woojin would be allowed to take Berry into the cabin with them. It eased Chan’s mind a lot to know that they didn’t have to leave Berry behind.

By day three Woojin was finally cleared to go home again. 

Chan handed Berry's leash to Seungmin and shouldered the weekend bag.

"The taxi should be here any minute now. Can you walk?", Chan asked, still worried and trying to help Woojin as much as he could.

"Yeah… I'm fine, don't worry…", Woojin replied but still appreciated Chan's hand on the small of his back, guiding and supporting him softly.

He was glad to go back home and not have people fussing around him anymore. He wanted to rest and recover in peace. And the others gladly let him.

They all greeted him when they came home, asking about his well-being but soon left him, Chan and Seungmin alone in the small apartment, seeing that Woojin was still tired and exhausted.

"Lie down, Woojinnie… I'll make some tea for us and then unpack everything so you have your time with Seungmin…", Chan offered not waiting for an answer and heading to the kitchen already to put on the kettle.

Seungmin smiled at his brother, watching him lie down on the couch and sat down next to him.

"He's doing so much for you… now even taking some days off so the both of you can go to Jeju…", he whispered, running his hands through his brother's hair.

"He does… it's nice of his friend to let us live in his house…", Woojin replied, watching Chan prepare the tea for them.

He really did a lot for him. From letting him live here to moving in with him, listening to him whenever he feels bad and putting up with his more depressed episodes, basically staying with him 24/7 if it's needed, even going so far now to spend a few days on Jeju with him. Away from the busy city, away from their friends, away from all the problems and troubles that have piled up.

Woojin didn't know how to interpret this. Was he just doing this because he was selfless and sacrificial and nice? Or was there more to it like Seungmin was suspecting? Was there actually the possibility that he felt the same for him? Woojin couldn't imagine it.

"I'm sure it's going to be nice. Maybe you can meet Jimin-noona? And get some rest the other days and relax…"

Woojin nodded. "I thought about meeting noona too… I haven't seen her since the trial… so maybe if she's free and Chan is up for it…"

"I'm sure he will be and noona will find time for you… just promise me one thing, hyung… try to rest and relax… focus on yourself and let Chan help you… don't let Dohyun win this… don't give up…", the younger begged, worry lacing his voice.

"I won't… as hard as it is… but I won't give him this satisfaction…"

He couldn't. Not only because he had promised his brothers and Chan that he'd stay and try to get better but also because he had made this promise to himself, because he had already survived so much that he couldn't give up now.

Because now he had the right people by his side, people that loved him and helped him unconditionally.

And with them, he knew, he could survive this too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had something completely different written down at first and rewrote everything because... Bambam. I didn't like my other solution with Dohyun so I had to think of something new.
> 
> I hope you liked the chapter! :) I had wanted to update earlier but I got a cat pretty much overnight and she's keeping me busy (she's 6 months old and her name's Lixie uwu)
> 
> If you liked the chapter please leave kudos or a comment uwu it means the world to us authors!
> 
> Thank you for reading ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/softkwj) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW Chapter 19:  
> /

"Chan, look!! That's the sea!", Woojin exclaimed with the utmost excitement. He was glued to the plane window as soon as the plane had started, Berry lying comfortably in his lap.

Woojin had been nervous in the days before his first flight, he hadn't known what to expect but Berry did a good job with calming him down during the take off. Now, he was more excited than nervous. Seeing the world under him, so tiny and fragile, made his worries look insignificant, and the farther away they got from Seoul, the farther away they were from his problems and troubles.

"The sea already, huh? That means we're landing soon…", Chan answered and leaned over to look out of the window, leaning his head on Woojin's shoulder. 

They had grown closer since Woojin's hospital stay. Chan had been worried that the older would close himself off again and actively worked against it, stayed with him when he felt bad again, stayed by his side whenever Woojin had needed him. They had been close before, but Woojin had the feeling something had clicked. The way Chan looked at him when he thought he didn't notice, the way his hands always lingered a bit longer on his arms, his shoulders, his body, whenever Chan touched him. He felt even safer with him. Something he had never felt before. And maybe he could still hope for his own happy ending.

Holding Berry close to his chest he followed Chan out of the plane after they had finally landed and were one of the first to exit the machine. As much as he had surprisingly enjoyed the flight, he was glad that he finally had solid ground underneath him again.

"How do we get to your friend's house?", Woojin asked while they were waiting for their suitcases.

"We'll get a taxi. We could take the bus too but it's faster by car. It's easier for us and for Berry, too."

The baker looked at his puppy in his arms and placed a soft kiss to her head. 

"We're going on a long walk later, okay baby girl? We all need that after sitting for so long.", he whispered while following Chan outside.

The younger hailed them a taxi as soon as they were outside and told the driver the address. Woojin watched the landscape fly by, watched the area grow more rural until the taxi stopped in front of a big house by the sea, about an hour away from Jeju City.

"We're here…", Chan said, pulling him out of his thoughts.

"This is it? It's… huge…!" 

Woojin stared at the house in front of him. He hadn’t expected it to be this big.

"Yeah, it's a bit big for only two people but we don't have to occupy the whole thing. We're probably spending most of the time outside or in the living room anyways…", Chan answered and Woojin nodded. He was sure that even if they slept in different rooms each day they wouldn’t be using all of them in one week.

They quickly made themselves home in the mansion, unpacking Berry’s necessities and feeding her, looking for the best room to sleep in together, one that was facing the sea with big windows from the ceiling to the floor. Woojin thought it was beautiful.

“Bambam has arranged that some groceries had already been delivered earlier today. Do you want to go on a walk with Berry and check out the area?”, the younger asked him after joining him in the big bedroom.

“Yeah, that’s a great idea…”

And so they did. Woojin put Berry on her leash and they went outside. He enjoyed the warm sun rays on his skin, enjoyed the calmness around them. It was so different from Seoul. 

“It’s so nice and quiet here… even though we’re not that far away from the city… But it’s beautiful…”, Woojin voiced his thoughts, watching Berry and their surroundings.

“It is! The perfect place to relax and get some rest. I’m glad Bambam lets us stay here. You need the time out…”

He did. More than he liked to admit. But he needed the time to heal, needed the time to get back on track to getting better. He had to and he wanted to.

The first few days flew by in the blink of an eye. They had checked out the area, had gone on long walks with Berry and relaxed at the beach, taking the time at one afternoon to even meet Jimin for a few hours.

Woojin had missed her and catching up with her on everything felt great. She had grown used to living on Jeju and had opened a new small bakery with her husband. Woojin had told her about his job at Minho’s coffee shop, told her everything that had happened since the last time they saw each other. It was a lot but Woojin was glad he was able to make new and happier memories with her now. Even though it was only short.

But as much as he had enjoyed meeting Jimin again, he was glad when he was back to being alone with Chan later that night, waiting for him on the bench on the veranda. Talking to her had brought back the memories he wanted to come to terms with and it was still exhausting. 

“The stars are beautiful tonight, aren’t they…?”, Chan said after stepping out onto the veranda to join Woojin, towel wrapped around his shoulders and hair still wet from the shower.

Woojin looked up at him, a soft smile on his lips. 

"They are…", he replied softly before looking back up into the starry night sky. "I love the stars… they are so far away but… they kind of calm me…"

"They do?"

"Mhm…", Woojin nodded, "I loved watching the stars after everyone went to bed. Seokjin was able to tell me a lot about them. The constellations and which stars are which… like the yellow butterflies they reminded me of him after he died… and they still do"

"That's a nice way to remember him… and maybe you can teach me about the stars too? I don't know much, I barely recognize the North Star…"

And Woojin did. He showed Chan the North Star, showed him Ursa Minor and Ursa Major from there on and other constellations he liked and was able to explain to him.

Chan enjoyed every second of it, was glued to his lips and watched him more than the stars above them, he swore his eyes were shining so brightly they stood in direct competition with them. He looked stunning.

The older noticed him watching and slightly turned towards him, blushing a faint red.

"Sorry… I got a bit carried away…", he whispered, a shy smile on his lips.

"No, it's fine. I love seeing you like this… happy and invested… and it's really interesting…", Chan reassured him, listening to Woojin for a bit longer, getting to know more about the stars and the universe.

While his own universe was leaning against him, his head resting comfortably on his shoulder.

"Speaking of stars…. And butterflies… can I ask you something, Chan…?", Woojin asked after a while where they've sat in silence, listening to the nearby ocean and the cicadas around them.

"Sure…"

"A tattoo of a butterfly… or a constellation… how much would that cost… and does it hurt…?"

Chan hasn't been prepared for this question. He never thought Woojin would be the type to get a tattoo.

"For you…?"

"Mhm… for my brothers…"

"Cute…”, Chan whispered fondly, “well… it depends on where you want to have the tattoo and how big it is. Everyone handles pain differently and we have to be careful because of your scars so that might hurt a bit more… but both tattoos would be rather small I think and delicate… I can tell you a price when I have a design for it… what exactly do you have in mind?"

"Either constellations from our star signs or… three butterflies. I don't know what would be better… or look better…"

Chan nodded, his mind already racing, thinking about the possibilities and what he could do and what would look best.

"Honestly… go for the butterflies… the combination of three butterflies looks better than three constellations. And I can do a lot more with it. Like colours, variations, size and how they should look together."

They kept on brainstorming, both of them bringing in ideas, dismissing others. Chan eventually got up to get his sketchbook from inside, starting to sketch and colour their ideas, working everything out until they had a design Woojin liked the most.

A simple and small one. Three butterflies, flying around each other. The biggest one coloured yellow while the other two were kept in black outlines.

"I love this design…", Woojin whispered after Chan had finalized it. He was leaning against him, head on his shoulder and body pressed softly into his side after the younger had wrapped his arm around him.

"I'm sure it will suit you well…"

"How much will it cost? So I can start putting away money for it."

"Nothing…"

Woojin's head shot up. "What? It can't be nothing!"

"It can be if I want it to be… I don't want you to pay for it… not for something like this…", Chan chuckled. He knew how much he would normally charge for it, but he also knew how much it meant to Woojin, how much healing it would do. And he knew how much Woojin meant to him.

"Chan… you can't mean that! I can't just take that for free…"

"Then… invite me to dinner?", he shrugged and turned his head to his friend, still not wanting anything in return and jokingly added: "Or supply me with your baking for the rest of my life. You choose."

"Then I'm going to bake for you for the rest of our lives!", Woojin answered without hesitating, blushing slightly when he realized what this implied. Would Chan even want to spend the rest of his life with him? He had already done so much for him, had always cared for him as much as he could, but did he want to do that forever? Did he want to be with him as much as Woojin wanted to be with him?

Chan noticed the faint red colour on his cheeks, felt as if everything around them went silent, the waves in the distance now drowned out by the sound of his beating heart. The cicadas around them quiet, as if they felt the tension building up around the two men sitting arm in arm on the veranda.

"Do you really want to spend the rest of your life with me…?", Chan asked, voice barely louder than a whisper.

"Yeah… I do…", Woojin replied, slightly leaning against the hand that has found its way to his cheek, caressing him softly.

"Good… because I want that too…"

Mustering up all his courage Woojin carefully leaned in, his heart beating fast in his chest, but skipping a beat when he felt Chan's soft lips against his, kissing him fondly and carefully. He replied the kiss in the same soft manner, melting against the younger, drowning out everything around them, wanting to enjoy this moment forever.

Around them the stars were still shining brighter than ever, the ocean was calm and the cicadas were quietly accompanying them with their music, celebrating the two lost souls that finally found their way together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more than 44k words later and there it finally is. The kith  
> It gave me such a hard time tbh cause I feel like I can't write fluff well ^^" I hope you still liked it!
> 
> Also "fun fact": I wrote the part in the plane while I was in the plane to Berlin for the Day6 concert lol
> 
> Anyways! Thank you for reading! ♥ I hope you liked the chapter! ♥
> 
> You can also find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/softkwj) and [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/sammyjw) if you have any questions!


	20. Chapter 20

When Woojin woke up he felt warm. He was wrapped in a blanket, cuddled up to Chan, his arms tightly wrapped around him and Berry at his feet. It was the perfect morning.

A lot more perfect than he had imagined. He had been afraid that it would be different when they came back home, that the magic faded as soon as they stepped into their apartment. But it didn't.

He still felt the same warmth flooding his body and heart that he had felt every morning since that fateful evening. Every morning when he woke up next to Chan, woke up next to his boyfriend.

Smiling happily he cuddled closer to Chan, nuzzling his face into the crook of his neck.

“Morning…”, he heard the low rumble of Chan’s voice, his arms wrapping tighter around him.

“Good morning…”, Woojin replied softly, caressing the naked skin under his fingers, “how did you sleep?”

“Good… not long enough probably…”, the younger chuckled before turning to lie on his back, stretching a bit.

“Go back to sleep for a few more minutes?”

“No… It’s probably late already and if I remember correctly we’re invited to brunch next door…”

Chan grabbed his phone to check the time. It was past nine already and they had to be next door in less than an hour. He knew they should probably hurry but lying here like this, Woojin’s head resting on his chest and his fingers absentmindedly tracing his tattoos, was far too comfortable to give up. He wanted to enjoy this a bit more but Bambam’s message caught his eye.

**[Bambam]:** Back home? Did you guys enjoy your vacation? :)

**[Channie]:** Our flight was delayed but now we’re back

**[Channie]:** The vacation was highly needed, man… we had some great days. Thank you for letting us stay in your house!

**[Bambam]:** Perfect! Lemme know if you want to stay there again! If it’s free it’s yours. Jisungie and Changbinnie can join you next time!

**[Bambam]:** And btw

**[Bambam]:** Dohyun is under control. You don’t have to worry anymore

Chan felt relief flood his body. He had waited to hear these four words, has waited for this to finally be over. He didn’t want to know how Bambam did it, he knew he had his ways and means, especially with the information he had told them recently. For him, it was only important that it was done. That Dohyun had been finally dealt with, that he would finally leave Woojin alone.

“Everything alright?”, Woojin asked, looking up at him with his big brown eyes and pulling him out of his thoughts and inner celebration.

“Yes, don’t worry… Just Bambam… he wanted to know if we’re back safely and if we enjoyed the trip…”, he explained, leaving out the most important part. Woojin didn’t have to know that he had gotten involved. It was better for him to know as little as possible.

“I hope you told him that it was great!”, the baker chuckled, hesitating before he continued, “did… did you tell him about us…?”

“No.. not yet…”, Chan replied lovingly, softly brushing through the silky brown hair, “I think our friends should be the first to know… Seungmin above all…”

Woojin nodded. Chan was right and he was glad that he hasn’t told anyone else yet. They had wanted to enjoy their first few days as a couple, hadn’t told anyone until now but Woojin knew that he wouldn’t be able to keep it from his brother much longer. He deserved to know about it and he wanted him to be the first. He just didn’t know how to tell him yet.

“I can hear you thinking, love!”, Chan laughed, pulling him closer and placing a soft kiss to his lips, making Woojin blush. He had never realised that he was so easy to read.

“Don’t worry about how to tell Minnie or how he’ll react, okay? It’s going to be fine. If I know one thing for sure then it’s that he’s going to be unbelievably happy for you…”

Woojin knew he was right but he couldn’t stop being nervous, couldn’t hide it when Seungmin came over half an hour later.

"You're back! How was the trip? Did you enjoy it?", the youngest asked, already hugging his big brother.

"Yeah… it was really nice… we'll tell you about it at brunch ok…? I… I wanted to talk to you about something else first…"

Woojin felt a bit uncomfortable when Seungmin looked at him with big and curious eyes. The words were easy to say but they wouldn't leave his lips. He didn't know how to say them, as if he had forgotten how to talk.

"Did anything happen…?", Seungmin started to get worried. It was obvious his brother had a hard time to express himself and usually this meant he had to be worried, meant that something had indeed happened.

"No… I-...", he started again, but was interrupted by Chan taking his hand and pulling him closer, placing a soft kiss to his lips.

Woojin instantly relaxed against him, feeling the tension that has built up leave his body again. He could always count on Chan, count on his help, knew he'd always be by his side and help him out. No matter how hard or how easy the situation was.

"That's what he wanted to tell you…", Chan chuckled softly, watching Seungmin who stared at them, mouth wide open.

"Oh my gosh! Are you-... no way!!" The initial surprise finally waned off and Seungmin couldn't contain his excitement anymore. He jumped into his brother's and brother-in-law's arms, hugging them both tightly.

"You deserve it so much! I'm so happy for you! These are the best news ever and-... fuck I'm just so happy for you-!"

“Thank you, Minnie-...”, Woojin whispered, overcome with emotions. He had known Seungmin would be happy for him but seeing it in front of him was different, made the whole situation even realer than it already was.

“Do the others know already?”, Seungmin asked after a while of them just standing there, holding each other.

“No… I wanted to let you know first… but we’re going to tell them at brunch, too…”

Their reaction was the same. Overwhelming joy and happiness.

Woojin hadn’t expected such an outburst of emotions all at once, when actually he should have. They had always been so supportive of him and had always wished him the best.

And the best for him was Chan, would always be Chan, now and for all eternity.

“I can’t believe that you kept it from us for a whole week!”, Jisung laughed happily, still attached to his best friend, hugging him tight.

“Oh come on! We wanted to have some time for us before we tell you guys!”, Chan replied laughing.

“Yeah, yeah, I get it~! I’m just so happy that you’re finally found each other! It took you long enough! Your pining got painful to watch!”

“Excuse me?!”, Chan laughed even more. He hadn’t known that they had been so obvious. But apparently not obvious enough for each other.

Woojin enjoyed the commotion around him, how they expressed their happiness for them. And he gladly took part of it and answered every question they had about how they had gotten together the week before.

Because he had never felt as happy as he did right now and he was sure he was finally on his right way.

There was only one thing missing to finally come to terms with everything.

“Are you sure? Really, really sure?”, Chan asked while putting the stencil onto his skin.

“I am, Channie… and I was sure the last twenty times you’ve asked, too…”, Woojin chuckled before turning towards the mirror to check the placement of his soon to be tattoo. 

They had chosen his left lower arm, close to the crook of his arm. This way he was always able to look at it when he wanted to and it was as close to his heart as possible.

“I like it like this, Channie… I’m ready…”

Woojin lied back down on the stretcher, watched his boyfriend start his work while Seungmin held his hand.

The pain was bearable. Not as painful as he had expected it to be, but still painful enough that he was glad Seungmin had offered to come along - to hold his hand but also to be by his side when he would immortalise his brothers on his skin.

They both kept watching Chan until he was done, fascinated by how easy he had made it look.

Woojin couldn't keep his eye off it once it was done. 

“It’s… It’s beautiful, Channie…”, he was speechless. He had already loved the design on paper but Chan had made real art out of it on his arm. It was even more beautiful than he could’ve imagined.

“Thank you…”, he whispered softly, carefully hugging his boyfriend with one arm, “I love it…”

“You’re welcome, love… I really hope it helps you…”, Chan was touched by his honest reaction. They had talked about it before, talked about how much it might help healing, help Woojin move forward. But he hadn’t been prepared for the tears, hadn’t been prepared for the raw emotions both brothers showed, sweeping away his doubt that it might do the contrary and hurt them even more.

Seeing them like this made him even more aware that this had been the right decision, that this would help both of them, and maybe it had been the last piece to help them come to terms with their past and look forward to the future. 

Time would show but they all knew they were on the right road now.

The right road to recovery.

The right road to their happiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter is done! I didnt't want to end the fic just after the kiss and hope I managed to tie together all loose ends!
> 
> I've already written the epilogue too, which I'm gonna upload within the next few days :)
> 
> I hope you liked the chapter too! I feel so weird and sad that this is really going to end soon! But I'm already planning another fic I just don't know when I'll start writing and uploading it :)
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! ♥
> 
> and please follow woojin on ig and twitter if you haven't already!!!  
> You can't imagine how happy I am that he's back and posting (even tho without captions lol)!! I'm so happy he's back with us as much as he can right now ;;


	21. Epilogue

Smiling Woojin closed the cupboard after doing the dishes and turned around to the table to grab his ring.

He looked at it for a moment, letting his fingers run over the engraving on the inside, smiling fondly when the memories came back.

The memories of their wedding day five years ago.

It had been perfect. Just them and their friends - their chosen family - and a small free ceremony under pink and white cherry blossoms. It still put happy tears and a smile on his face when he remembered Chan’s reaction to his white suit, how much both of them have cried that day out of pure happiness when their friends had surprised them with Berry as their ring bearer, how cute she had looked running down the aisle towards them. It had truly been a perfect day, one that Woojin would always treasure in his memories.

A soft whimper brought him back to reality, pulled him out of his thoughts. He quickly slipped on his wedding band before heading down the hall.

He and Chan had moved back into the big apartment four years ago, had made themselves a new and bigger home after they had been accepted as foster parents. Jisung had already moved in with Minho at that time and Seungmin and Changbin had been more than willing to swap the apartments again, not needing so much space for only the two of them.

“Hey, Seokjinnie… it’s okay… Papa is here…”, Woojin whispered softly, carefully picking up their one year old son from his crib. He had been their youngest foster child, coming to them only a month after he was born and no one had dared to seperate them again. Only half a year later they had finalised the adoption, had welcomed him into their small family as their real son, their second child.

“We should get you changed now, hm? Daddy and Minji will be back soon… and then uncle Minnie will pick you two up so Papa and Daddy can celebrate their anniversary together...”, he said after Seokjin had calmed down and cuddled up to him. He quickly changed his diaper and changed his clothes when he heard the front door being opened, just in time when he left the bedroom.

“Papaaa!! We’re home!!”, their four year old daughter exclaimed happily, already running towards him and hugging his legs. “We went on a long walk with Berry-ah on our way home!”

“Ah… that’s why it took you so long to get home?”, Woojin chuckled, lovingly brushing through Minji’s dark hair. She had been their first foster child, coming to them when she was only a year old. They hadn’t planned on adopting her back then but soon had to realise that she had won their hearts, that they didn’t have the heart to let her go again. The first few weeks had been nerve-wrecking, when they still had to live with the fear that her birth mother wanted her back. But in the end it turned out in their favour and Woojin couldn’t be happier. She was a wonderful and intelligent child and an amazing big sister for Seokjin. They still fostered children of all ages from time to time, had an own room for them ready when CPS stood in front of their door in the middle of the night. But knowing that Minji and Seokjin would stay with them forever calmed his mind a lot, made him happier than he ever could imagined.

“Yes! And because Daddy picked up flowers on our way home!”

“Ahhh… Minji-ah… don’t spoil the surprise…”, Chan laughed, finally joining his little family and pressing a soft kiss to his husband’s lips. “These are for you, love… happy anniversary…”

Woojin smiled happily, taking the bouquet into his free hand and leaned against Chan.

“They are beautiful, Channie… thank you…”, he said, leaning over and kissing him again. “I love you… happy anniversary…”

Smiling brightly he stayed with them like this, enjoying his husband’s embrace and their children close - fur child included.

If someone had told him that his future would look like this a few years ago, he wouldn’t have believed them, wouldn’t have thought it would be possible to turn out like this.

But right now he couldn’t be happier. He had a wonderful husband, two wonderful children and the best friends-turned-family he could’ve imagined. His life didn’t have the best start and it had taken him long until he was on the right path, but what mattered to him now was that he had survived.

That he didn’t have to worry about tomorrow today.

That Seungmin was happy now.

That he could be happy now.

That, in the end, it was all good now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're done ㅠㅠ  
> I was so excited to write the epilogue because I had this idea in mind for a while already.  
> And now it's over. I feel kinda emotional because I've been writing on it for so long ㅠㅠ 
> 
> A big thank you to everyone who's been reading, commenting and giving kudos 💕 I hope you liked this fanfic! I definitely enjoyed writing it! 💕


End file.
